the spectrum heart cathedral system

Time to figure out my buddy CALYREX!! ❤

Basic= GALAR region= gallant, gala, GALAHAD (King Arthur), HOLY GRAIL (ALL CHALICE INFO RELEVANT), & disease (Gaelic)
Dynamax curse= PAPILLOMAVIRUS HORNS!!!
✱ Based on UK, notably WALES, SCOTLAND, & the ISLE OF MAN. (+London, Bath, Liverpool, etc.)

✱ He is a WOLPERTINGER: a rabbit-deer. "General rule" is JAY WINGS, ROEBUCK ANTLERS, COTTON OR PHEASANT TAILS, & SABER FANGS. (fusion) (+duck feet?) "CHIMERICAL"?? They are very shy & live in dark Bavarian forests (conifers, rolling mountains, MASSIVE.) They have a weakness for female beauty and, like unicorns, can only be caught by a beautiful young woman-- ideally at night, on a full moon, in a secluded nook. "They... fall in love with human females."
✱ ARCTIC ones are "snow hare, polar fox, reindeer, & snow owl" fusions, "beautiful & deadly"
✱ Related to JACKALOPES? Shy unless approached, then deadly. POISON BITE? Can imitate the human voice!
✱ Wolpertingers are a GLOBAL phenomenon. "One must be drunk to see them"? Partial to drink (whiskey), too.
✱ "Warrior rabbits"! ALSO, HORNED RABBITS go way back, to Persia, Medieval manuscripts, etc.
✱ KAUYUMARI? "Blue deer" deity; seems to fit "life-bringer" "harrower of hell" tropes?? Antlers from RABBIT? ALSO ties to LIVE-GIVING BLOOD? (CHALICE! PLUS Kauyumari is tied to WATER?? ) + "Overwhelming perception" with which he "secures life" = the "divine essence in all things". = "NIERIKA": portal that CONNECTS THE (3) WORLDS = a mirror, holes carved in stone, EYE OF GOD, FACE OF DIVINE = most notably all refer to PEYOTE, "the visionary sacrament through which they can be in contact with the realm of the sacred" = "The intimate relationship between [plants & humans], evidenced by certain plants producing substances that can influence the depths of human mind & spirit" & "the wonderful/ dreadful effects prove their religious importance & the sacred respect they are due" effectively. Psychoactive plants have SACRAMENTAL purposes, + medicine! There are many, but we're focusing on PEYOTE: it is American (jackalopes) AND it blooms as a CACTUS, reminiscent in shape with Calyrex's head & notable as such.
✱ PRAYER BOWLS (chalices) & WHITE FLOWERS (life) tied to HOLY WORDS-- kept in a basket ("hamper" = "hanepier" = case for holding a CUP = "hanap" CHALICE) (But ALSO in medicine, "hanepier" = SKULL or HELMET→) held by his ANTLERS, & received BY THE HEART. Again, there's a lot, & I don't need it all, nor do I want to appropriate it-- we're just looking for relevance to Calyrex, and, always, for reference to CHRIST.
✱ On that note! "Blue Deer was created to give life to the votive offerings (to God?), so he is connected to the PRAYER BOWL, full of fresh water (the nierika = portal to sacred = BAPTISM??) & given to "OUR MOTHER OF THE SEA" (STELLA MARIS + OCEAN OF DIVINE MERCY), as his BLOOD gives LIFE to the prayer bowls"!! OBVIOUS EUCHARISTIC CHALICE. Also notable, "Blue Deer offers his blood in sacrifice to nurture & grow the CORN" = staple crop = wheat/ bread of life = EUCHARIST again!!
✱ LASTLY there is a SHEEP, "its blood was the first shed to allow Kauyumari's words to rest (in the heart?); in its head is a plumed ARROW, attracting his words & embodying the Spirit of the sacrificed lamb." CHRIST = SACRIFICIAL LAMB = WORD OF GOD = HOLY SPIRIT = ARROWS OF LOVE/ REPARATION FOR BLASPHEMY = FREE WILL (in the head) + RATIONAL SACRIFICE, etc. Very rich in Christ symbolism, unsurprisingly!
✱ Another notable paraphrased myth of BLUE DEER is that he first appeared to a group of starving youths, all glorious & fat, so as they chased him in hunger he pitied them & instead led them to PEYOTE-- it SATIATED THEIR PHYSICAL & SPIRITUAL HUNGER & THIRST, despite intense famine, AND it was also MEDICINE for healing their diseases of malnourishment & poverty! (EUCHARIST) It was, all in one, "rain, food, & health"-- BOTH "deer & corn," essentially both BLOOD & BREAD (EUCHARIST). But the packaged significance & parallels of all this being in a SACRED CACTUS PLANT is notable, ALSO to Christ Jesus, Who was a desert flower of abundance & health blooming in the Palestine deserts & the dry starving hearts of unbelieving men. "Christ is the Vine," yes, but He's also the APPLE TREE... which is our next point!
✱ But first, PEONIES. Calyrex's head bud looks JUST like a peony bud, just white. They are often called the "KING OF FLOWERS"? In China, it symbolizes royalty, wealth, honor, bravery, & integrity-- but also it was exchanged upon farewells as a GIFT OF LOVE.
✱ In Japanese tattoos, peonies are associated with a novel in which 108 men/women were "banished to the hills by the feudal government" & banded together to "ferociously" foil their oppressors-- they were the "Outlaws of the Marsh" & were covered in tattoos, often peonies. Also titled "ALL MEN ARE BROTHERS." It's not really relevant, except for the possible idea of heroic rebellion against unjust power & invaders.
✱ Peonies also mean COMPASSION, purity, lifelong commitment, joy, & MARRIAGE? They live long!
✱ BTW, peony = heal; Calyrex MENDS HEARTS!!
✱ Peonies don't like to be moved or divided, need to mature for years before blooming, cannot have too deep roots, & need support to hold their weight. All that can & should be expanded symbolically IN RESPECT TO CALYREX-- also taking into account his BUD STATE.
✱ In winter, the foliage dies back BUT the CROWN & ROOTS survive (Calyrex silhouette??) They need drained soil & full sun or they ROT. Also "if they don't go dormant in winter, they will flower poorly the next year." Cutting down to ONE bud will boost its size.
✱ Flower lack is caused by no sun, overcrowding/ competition, disease, or "PLANTING CROWNS TOO DEEPLY."
✱ Peonies, though, thrive in cooler, dry places with lots of sun. They are NATIVE TO ASIA.
✱ ETYMOLOGY = "Paeon," Greek student of "god of medicine" Aesculapius; teacher got jealous & Zeus saved Paeon by making him a flower. Paeon is considered the "physician of the gods", HEALING ALL THEIR BATTLE WOUNDS. That's CANON! It also pings for King Arthur again, with the Grail (chalice), but we'll get there.
✱ The name "Paieon" ALSO was used for ANY "god" who was a "deliverer from any evil or calamity," even sorrow & pain. Again, CANON. Paradoxically, "paiein" means TO STRIKE, giving "destroyer" vibes, & so "Paean" would both heal & avert evils AND go to battle to strike AT those evils. Hymns & warsongs both. PROMPT.
✱ Paieon healed with HERBS (hello Peyote) & "knew the remedies for all things"; the "healer of pain."
✱ HE WAS SAID TO "HAVE NO PART IN DESIRE; HE IS ALIEN TO THE EROTES" = CHASTITY!!
✱ TONS of references to plants as medicine.
✱ Paeon used the PEONY ROOT (liquid) to CURE HADES??? It was a POISON ARROW TO THE SHOULDER. (See Blue Deer!!) BTW HADES ≠ HELL.
✱ Deer were an ancient STAPLE FOOD & were frequently seen as MESSENGERS OF GOD (angels!!)-- Calyrex has a notably wing-shaped cape!
✱ WARRIOR RABBITS, too-- they fight with their horns.
✱ CALYREX IS NOT A SKVADER; he also DOESN'T HAVE ACTUAL HORNS-- he has ears split into FOUR, which act like sepals. His bud is TRANSLUCENT when light hits it in official art??
✱ His cape ONLY becomes frilly & winglike ON HIS HORSE-- more Apocalypse angel vibes = White: CONQUEST (IN CHRIST??) & BLACK: FAMINE, in stark contrast to his title as the "King of Bountiful Harvests"-- although, on Spectrier, it is said they "ran all over Galar to BRING GREEN TO THE WASTELANDS." This is so notable-- Calyrex can both cause plants to "spring forth" and can MEND HEARTS!! So despite Spectrier's ghostly tendency to drain life & herald famine, Calyrex HEALS it and TRANSMUTES the presence of famine into a herald of MIRACULOUS ABUNDANCE.
✱ LIKEWISE, Glastrier-- a forceful, brutal, arrogant conqueror-- has its heart MELTED in a sense BY CALYREX, who uses its power for good in serving/ saving the weak, AND by uniting raw "justice" (in war) to MERCY, as Calyrex HEALED HIS ENEMIES WOUNDS after battle (PAEON)!!!
✱ BUT YOU NEED THE REINS OF UNITY. Without this BOND of LOVE (the horses are called "beloved" & "faithful" by Calyrex), THERE IS NO LOVING TRANSMUTATION. "Make all thoughts captive to Christ & obedient to Him!" Christ is the TRUE KING, Who alone bestows kingly authority on earth, AND charges all kings to justly IMITATE HIS EXAMPLE of mercy, humility, love, & service. "The greatest must be a servant," etc.
✱ The reins ALLOW those they unite TO communicate with each other (love surmounts ALL obstacles), enhance Calyrex's power "over bountiful harvests" (blessings of abundance TO FEED THE HUNGRY & GIVE LIFE), "unite him TO his beloved steed," AND were GIVEN TO CALYREX BY THE PEOPLE!!!
✱ They CREATE it by fusing a lock of hair (black or white) from either steed WITH a beautiful, Radiant BLUE Petal Calyrex gives YOU from HIMSELF. The horsehair can only be obtained by DEFEATING them-- a humbling act-- and when fused with the petal, they BECOME the reins, now luminous blue (seen in card art quite strikingly). Like this, they are "AS ONE"-- a paradox, but a blessed one-- it shows, literally, how unity via self-giving love & its resultant communication-- unity with CHRIST, the Life-giver & King-- can REDEEM & SANCTIFY ANYONE, no matter how troubled & lost. Calyrex TAMED him & now, instead of selfish rage & pride, he is loyal & uses his power for THE GOOD OF THE SAME PEOPLE HE USED TO TERRORIZE-- notably, by "ravaging & raiding" ALL OF THEIR FOOD, especially the CARROTS! THAT is when the Reins of Unity were forged: in gratitude, AFTER Spectrier & Glastrier had been HUMBLED and now SERVED in loyal LOVE. Their hearts had to BE bondable first!
✱ THEIR INITIAL FUSION CREATED A BOUNTIFUL FOREST IN THE WASTE (FAMINE & DEATH DEFEATED)!!! THEN they traveled & spread green life & food; again, an apostolate effect of sorts.
✱ The PEOPLE built the CROWN SHRINE for them to live in-- a GORGEOUS monastery-esque structure with STAINED GLASS even. BUT!!!! WHEN THE PEOPLE GOT COMPLACENT & LOST FAITH & GRATITUDE, CALYREX LOST HIS POWER TO DO GOOD for them, the Reins of Unity BROKE, and they faded into legend. (BTW Crown = King = CHRIST)
✱ CALYREX CAN SEE ALL OF TIME??? "KNOWN" events specifically?? So there's NOT omniscience, but WISDOM & CLARITY & KNOWLEDGE. Holy Spirit gifts, really.
✱ Yearly, Calyrex brought food & vegetation to the people = his LEFT hand for fruit, his RIGHT for verdant blooms & grass.
✱ Assumedly prior to all this, Calyrex was FOUND INJURED in the Crown Tundra DURING A TIME WHEN IT WAS BARREN & INHOSPITABLE. Calyrex just APPEARED during a bleak winter, "regal yet wounded & weak" (Christlike), so the people were MOVED TO PITY, took him into their village, and nursed him back to health!! (Loving service) Once healed, Calyrex "emitted a dazzling BLUE (heavenly) light" that turned the tundra into lush plains. The people then thrived DESPITE the frigid & barren region BECAUSE CALYREX SUSTAINED THEM WITH HIS CONSTANT BLESSING. The people now considered him their KING, perhaps because his life-nurturing power already did hold a sort of honorable rule over them, in gratitude & goodness (you WANT to serve such a gentle & loving King).
✱ CALYREX ALSO PERSONALLY PROMISED to tame Glastrier/ Spectrier, a "ruffian" & rebel, and soon enough he was "BENDING HIS KNEES" to Calyrex in CONVERSION & LOYALTY (lost sheep/ prodigal son?)! THAT'S when the people made the Reins of Unity FOR them, so Calyrex could "command him with ease."
✱ I find that detail SO notable-- Calyrex DIDN'T & perhaps COULDN'T make the reins; he didn't demand Glas/Spec's loyalty so "hard." BUT the bonds were forged BY THOSE THEY SERVED, not as a control device, but as a SIGN OF GRATITUDE, and even a SYMBOL OF FRIENDSHIP, as the reins REQUIRE a GIFT OF SELF from BOTH parties, which the people only UNITE for a new purpose of closer unity-- more loyalty & ease of obedience THROUGH self-giving relationship, NOT control or force, just GUIDANCE (easy yoke)! AND IT HAD TO BE REMADE YEARLY. Their relationship & commitment NEEDED that regular, true rededication & renewal... BUT. IT ALSO BANKED ON THE FAITH & GRATITUDE OF THE PEOPLE THEY SERVED. Without their love, Calyrex & Glas/Spec's bond would weaken & break-- pride & arrogance would again replace Glas/Spec's humility, angry as he would be with their lax hearts, & Calyrex would lose his ability to do them good as their hearts would slowly but surely turn cold towards him as their faith & love waned.
✱ Glas/Spec LEFT Calyrex then, as they had no power or purpose, & thus no reason to stay united. Glas/Spec went to the Crown Shrine & Calyrex disappeared?-- a show of arrogant taunting vs meek humility, it seems.
✱ The Crown Shrine was built AROUND a "sacred sapling"? No origin given. Perhaps it was the first green thing Calyrex brought forth. But the Shrine/ Temple, like a Church, was built TO GIVE CALYREX A "WORTHY HOME." You can't ignore the Catholic architecture here... nor the fact that, when they LOST faith, CALYREX (the gentle king of life) LEFT IT, & GLAS/SPEC (rebel of pride & destruction) TOOK OVER. It was heavily symbolic of the state of the people's hearts: who & what they were REALLY worshipping in their forgetfulness of LOVE & the King that loved them (Christ parallels). The barrenness in their hearts brought the same fate to their land, & they began to starve & freeze again, without the warmth & nourishment that grateful faith & love ALLOWED to enter & change their lives!
✱ There's a WEIRD myth post-Calyrex that claims he would "steal the body of those who misbehaved," which strikes me as a GROSS MISUNDERSTANDING of the nature of his bond/union with Glas/Spec. Their fusion was NOT a "stealing of one" BUT a "sharing of TWO." Their bodies remained INDIVIDUAL, BUT now operated AS ONE, in a sync born NOT of force, power, or control, but of HUMBLE, LOYAL, GRATEFUL, FRIENDLY LOVE. It's a COOPERATION for a GREATER GOOD & PURPOSE THROUGH self-giving & self-sacrifice to the point of achieving a FULLER self, FOR OTHERS' SAKE. Also, the specific mention of "misbehaving" also reveals their fear (therefore NO "perfect love") of justice & inability to grasp BOTH mercy AND conversion??? Because Glas/Spec REALLY misbehaved, BUT he never lost his body-- actually, EVEN IF HE DIED & SPLIT IN TWO, HIS BODY WAS NOT LOST TO DEATH?? Big Christ/ resurrection vibes; "if you life IN ME and I IN YOU, YOU WILL NEVER DIE." But the people couldn't grasp the SHARING & SELF-SURRENDER/ GIVING for the sake of cooperative love & SERVICE!!! Yes they worshipped Calyrex, yes they had faith, BUT was it only "because he multiplied the loaves"?? Was their devotion corrupted by becoming complacent in abundance, forgetting the utter famine he saved them from? Did they forget the tender compassion they showed him, which he reciprocated a thousandfold-- OR did they decide he OWED them, forgetting pure charity?? Either way, they could no longer even conceptualize the truth of Calyrex's actions; their lax hearts were blinded now. They forgot his face, & now could only mourn that vague yet keen loss of a King who once loved them so, & gave them riches untold without cost-- "come, all you who hunger, and dine without cost"-- recognizing their hopeless & powerless need. BUT THAT'S THE DOOR, THAT HUMILITY & CONTRITION & SEEKING, however feeble. Deep down they could still taste the heaven of mutual charity & I think they hungered for THAT even more than food. All they had now were fables, which kept their faith from totally dying thanks to HOPE-- an abandoned BUT extant church, testifying to a greater yet forgotten purpose AND the King for whom it was built (a King who COULD NOT MOVE BACK IN until/ unless they STOPPED WORSHIPPING IDOLS. so to speak)-- and a poor yet sincere effort at a statue, a sign of repentance and affection, an apology & a consolation all in one-- the King couldn't have been a mere myth, to hold such a place in their hearts, and that statue was a reminder of & hope for his literal presence to return & take its rightful place again.
✱ BUT THIS is the BEST part-- if the Crown Tundra people were prodigal children, then Calyrex was ABSOLUTELY the father. He NEVER LEFT! He is seen WATCHING OVER THEM, assumedly heartbroken & yearning too, POWERLESS to help WITHOUT FAITH, HUMILITY, LOVE, and REPENTANCE. Their doors AND hearts had to be UNLOCKED & OPEN for him to come back in & reign there... just like Glas/Spec, who would have to do the SAME now in the present. We'll get to that!
✱ BTW, CALYREX & GLAS/SPEC'S INITIAL FUSION WAS OF THEIR OWN HEARTS!! The reins, made by the people, were only a symbol OF the people, & only STRENGTHENED their unity BY GIVING IT A DIRECTION OF PURPOSE!!! It's not a chain, but a BOND. I can't emphasize that enough. It's becoming a SLAVE OF LOVE, a HUMBLE SERVANT, under a HUMBLE MASTER... Christ, His friends, & His people. I ALSO reiterate: The reins ALLOW the connected TO communicate with each other! They heighten their relationship from simple cooperation to DEVOTION. "I no longer call you servants but FRIENDS." This bond UNITES THEM AS BELOVED (!!!) and thus boosts Calyrex's ability to flourish life AND FOOD; again, Eucharistic vibes, as it is a SACRAMENTAL BOND, a COMMUNION, and LIFE-GIVING FOOD, THAT UNITES YOU TO THE WHOLE BODY OF CHRIST, His CHURCH-- the Temple of which HE is the Crown, the Head-- for the sake of LOVING SERVICE in FEEDING HIS SHEEP in the cold-hearted, desolate wastes of the devil's destructive attacks on the world. Calyrex, imitating Christ, is RESTORING Creation to its INTENDED state of nourishing life & love & giving & sharing! Food is grown AS A HARVEST not to be hoarded or gobbled, but to FEED THE HUNGRY, and to rejoice in CHRIST'S ABUNDANT LOVE, with "plenty of wicker baskets left over."
✱ THE CARROT SEEDS. "To plant IN A FIELD (parable of the sower!!!); the kind of carrot is determined by WHICH field you plant the seeds in." There are only TWO fertile grounds available... the SNOWY VALLEY (slope) and the OLD CEMETERY. Calyrex, imitating Christ IN HIS LOVE FOR THE LOST, is bringing food-- nourishment AND communion, a deeply natural act of love-- OUT OF BARRENNESS. Without cooperative love & care & concern, NOTHING would grow! You humbly buy the Seeds from an old farmer, it's so simple & pure. NORMAL carrot seeds, purchased from an old man who is STILL growing vegetables to feed his people, despite the cold & hard ground, sells YOU seeds so YOU can feed others too... and YOU'RE only buying them FOR a friend in need. It's all charity, simple as food & friendship.
✱ Carrots are hardy ROOT vegetables that can withstand tougher climates; they are actually TAPROOTS, reservoirs of nutrition for the plant, which are designed to dig DEEPLY into the soil to REACH WATER & SURVIVE DROUGHT. They are difficult to remove & are SINGULAR in purpose, not a tangled mes, and you CANNOT DIVIDE IT & have it still grow WITHOUT THE CROWN & ROOT IN EACH PART!!! "I am the Vine," etc., but ALSO Christ is our CROWN! And attached SINGULARLY to Him, we too can send down DEEP taproots int he dark yet fertile soils of life, where we WILL anchor in BY UNITY TO CHRIST BY FAITH, and absorb life from deeply hidden springs of LIVING WATER despite any lethal droughts on the surface world.
✱ OH. Also, Glastrier is PESTILENCE. He WEARS A CROWN & USES ARROWS (AGAIN). White horses in general were associated with warrior heroes, fertility, & END OF TIMES SAVIOR, Who traditionally rode a white horse in triumph over evil-- but white horses can ALSO mean DEATH, and when linked to pestilence/ disease, we have a tie to ETERNATUS as well. BUT. In general, horses represent freedom & power & spiritual awareness, BUT when the ego takes over that you get the ANTICHRIST, not the real Christ. In any case, it is CONQUEST.
✱ White horses are often PSYCHOPOMPS, guides between the LIVING & DEAD (Christ or Satan, abundance or famine, etc.). They are also heroic & pure & the ONLY fitting mount for a King! So there's a dichotomy, with which one Glastrier can become-- alone or serving Calyrex. An evil white horse has poison arrows; a good one, LOVE.
✱ Tangent: the BLACK horse of famine, Spectrier, is JUST (scales) in how misuse, neglect, & luxury will lead to LOSS & DEATH: "Memento mori," the ghostly steed reminds us of consequence and the beyond. It is ONLY by honoring the reality of death & the soul that we CAN let go of greed & gluttony, and THAT is why Calyrex uses Spectrier to BRING ABUNDANCE. "Our daily bread" is still needed, but we MUST RECEIVE IT FROM THE KING, and use it JUSTLY! Spectrier reminds us of the alternative & cost.
✱ White is FALSE PROPHETS of pride, of whitewashed tombs, of power held through lies.
✱ The Black horse DOESN'T TOUCH the oil & wine (blood & anointing?) but there's NO BREAD (Christ)!
✱ Carrots symbolize HONESTY, confidence in good conscience, integrity, wellbeing, HEALTH & PROSPERITY, fruits of labor, success in efforts, LONG patience (esp. hidden & dark). They also IMPROVE OUR EYESIGHT-- BOTH STEEDS ARE BASICALLY BLIND. They have NO vision on their own, wild & free but with NO DIRECTION. Calyrex's carrots are PURPOSE-- a vision of meaning & a future! This WILL bring them all those other good qualities.
✱ In Hebrew, CARROT = CUT ("g.z.r." root), as in making a DECISIVE CHOICE ("cut" a choice) one way or the other.  Combining this with the carrot-- given as FOOD, requiring a sort of surrender to humble service & helplessness (can't feed self, need help to live, NO PRIDE)-- is a choice between LIFE & DEATH again. Relatedly, the "carrot & stick" metaphor contrasts "hard vs soft" power-- obedience through punishment, OR through reward. Yes it's a basic start, BUT any good heart will inevitably soften to true devotion towards someone who is/was willing to feed & guide you even when you were greedy & stubborn & ungrateful. Calyrex just loves his horse and wants him back. So he, although nearly powerless alone, humbly asks others to aid him in this mission of mercy & kindness, PERPETUATING those virtues, all to grow his friend's favorite food as a PEACE GIFT-- Glas/Spec used to STEAL them! But here is one JUST for him, growing right in the midst of ice & graces-- love & life flourishing hardy & strong despite all odds. This carrot is the ultimate reward in what it manifests, of Calyrex & their bond. 

1. CROWN TEMPLE / SHRINE (CHRIST/ CHURCH HOME)
GLAS/SPEC IS STILL THERE, WATCHING, but WON'T COME OUT WITHOUT THE CARROT! (needs that tangible good, that hope made REAL)
2. PATH TO THE PEAK (CROWN PUN; "HEAD") = ALL barren snowy trees. STEPS! & AWFUL Giga beams. NO ABILITIES; stripped.
3. TUNNEL TO THE TOP/ SUMMIT (EUCHARIST REF, "source & summit") = CAVE. Winding! Tied to HEART; INITIATION? SEARCH FOR MEANING. + TOMB! ✞
4. SNOWY VALLEY/ SLOPE = FIRST snowy spot. Going UP! (get ice carrot)
5. GIANT'S BED = HUGE. → GIANT'S FOOT (scary) RUINS. DEVIL TRIED TO "STOMP OUT" GOOD??
↑(RUMBLING SEA CAVES → THREE POINT PASS → SPLIT DECISION RUINS → FRIGID SEA)
↑(FROSTPOINT FIELD = BETWEEN 2 PATHS. Cold. Flat, or UP) → FREEZINGTON (The ONLY settlement!!!) → (DEAD END) SLIPPERY slope/ Max lair (HELL)
6. OLD CEMETERY (shade carrot) (No snow. Lots of ghosts BUT ALSO NIDORAN??? "Till death do us part" pair??) (AUDINO too!! "Listen" and "hearing the HEART"; life despite death) (THERE ARE RUINS?? of CHURCHES??)
7. [RIVER] BALLIMERE LAKE → (surrounds) DYNA TREE HILL (in it) (GLUTTONY.) (Also NO HEALING POSSIBLE; just the tainted Berries!!! LOST EDEN SATAN TREE) → LAKESIDE CAVE

✱ About that fear of Calyrex "stealing bodies?" DEER & RABBITS DON'T EAT PEONIES.
✱ Peonies cure many diseases, and WHITE ones show APOLOGY. Also peonies are for 12th anniversaries= 12 is PERFECTION OF GOV'T AUTHORITY-- the King has returned, contrite, and seeks to COMPLETE his love-- Christ marrying His Church, and lovingly ruling Her.
✱White Peony ROOT is said to cure pain (sin), inflammation (vices), cramps (sin hinders), autoimmune (selfdestruct), & bloodclots (wrong life). There's TONS of symbolism! White Peony symbolizing "apology, regret, shame," and Peonies being generally "compassion, honor, fortune, joy, etc." = White: PURE, VS "White horse" paradox of PRIDE! The "King of Flowers" (CHRIST) purifies this color true, making it a bridge to HIM & His cures THROUGH that humility & love! For Calyrex to speak THROUGH PEONY exemplifies this. He's the flower given a HEALING gesture, to RESTORE relationship, allowing PERFECT KINGSHIP to be restored, thus curing the ills of stubborn pride and FLOURISHING THROUGH SERVICE & COOPERATION.
✱ BTW Peony really seems to have a pure heart. He is SUCH a dad... and he has GREAT FAITH; open heart.
✱ THAT SCARY DYNAMAX TREE has FRUITS that are basically SATAN APPLES (fallen Eden) (the birds that eat it FIGHT): the tree is IN THE MIDDLE OF THE "GARDEN" (vs. Tundra), surrounded by water, and IF YOU EAT OF IT YOU WILL "BE LIKE A GOD," but an EVIL "god," ETERNATUS... because Dynamax energy IS PART OF ITS BODY/ ESSENCE and it's a HORRIBLE corruption of intimacy, an power, in AWFUL contrast to Calyrex = His power is FOR OTHERS, supportive, humble, etc. But Eternatus power is FOR SELF, offensive, proud, etc. ALL "MAX" FORMS LOOK DEMONIC... & BIBLICAL GIANTS WERE DESCENDED FROM FALLEN ANGELS. The "Giant's Footprint" appears to have STOMPED ON CHURCHES??? There are RUINS BY A GRAVEYARD. And that area of misleading verdance-- oh yes, it's a "garden," but the ONLY food is TOXIC and NO ONE LIVES THERE, ONLY GRAVES-- opens up into SEA CAVES & a FRIGID OCEAN... inhospitable, undrinkable, rough waters bringing DEATH, NOT LIFE, & symbolizing the devil again. "Three point pass" leads to 3 dead ends. It's a scary mockery.
✱ BUT!!! THAT THREE WITH THE FRUIT WAS NOT CREATED EVIL, and there IS HOPE OF REDEMPTION FOR IT... IN CALYREX. That bud on his head isn't a "flower," per se. IT'S A FRUIT BUD. And it appears to be the SAME KIND AS THE DYNAMAX TREE, before it "fell" (when Eternatus fell)! In official art, the "bud" LOOKS TRANSLUCENT even, as if it weren't a flower but a FRUIT.
✱ Calyrex's "bud" LOOKS just like a Peony, BUT its connection to the Dynamax & large calyx makes it STRONGLY RESEMBLE A PERSIMMON. And some persimmons ARE PURPLE. That's very close to the Red/Blue dichotomy in Dyna/Caly, as persimmons are Orange/Purple, and purple is RIPE? But the shape is EXACT, even with the "bulge lines" into 4 sections. It's soft & translucent and the ONLY RIPE FRUIT LEFT, truly-- the only one that is NATURALLY EDIBLE, not "mutated" & toxic! OH-- AND IT'S ONLY "GLOWY" WHEN HE'S ON HIS HORSE. Otherwise, alone, it's the same opaque dark green as the "buds" around his neck, which don't change color on the horse.
✱He has 8 buds, which symbolizes HOPE, "new beginnings," salvation, triumph, bright futures, etc.
✱But he's ALL BUDS. He's a CALYX, NOT A BLOSSOM HIMSELF: The calyx is the FIRST part of a flower that develops, and the petals & parts grow WITHIN. The calyx PROTECTS the flower as it develops, preventing it from drying out.
✱BUT. "After flowering, many plants have NO MORE USE FOR THEIR CALYX, AND IT BEGINS TO WITHER." THAT'S what the villagers did-- when they finally had food & flowers, they LET CALYREX WILT... but they didn't realize that THEIR SOULS WEREN'T MATURE, and Calyrex was PROTECTING & NURTURING THEM. So once he was thrown off... the cold returned & crushed them. Their hearts dried up from lack of gratitude & love. They weren't ready to bloom on their own yet-- and wouldn't be WITHOUT that cooperative unity!
✱"THE HOLY GRAIL OF FLOWERS IS THE BLUE ROSE." They DON'T EXIST in nature, but are rich with myth, symbolizing a LONGING FOR MIRACLES, the "search for the impossible," wishes/ dreams becoming reality, etc. In general, roses symbolize ARDENT LOVE & BEAUTY, the "QUEEN OF FLOWERS," and a blue one in that respect speaks to a PERFECT love-- a HOLY love, blue as the heavens. There are also 2 myths in which a woman would only marry a man who gave her a blue rose: many tricked her with stone, paint, magic, but this is not true love. Ultimately, a simple & pure man gave her a white rose-- "if their love is true, it will be blue." And so it was!! Blue roses are NOT unrequited-- just "unattainable," and for GOOD REASON: true & perfect love CANNOT be "attained," or created, or hunted down, or bred, etc. Blue roses, according to myth, ONLY come through a PURE & HUMBLE GIFT OF A WHITE ROSE. Where others gave up of this "impossible task" or turned to trickery, the one who valued LOVE persisted in HUMILITY... and FAITH, NOT POWER OR PRESTIGE!!! That's why it's "impossible"... BUT "nothing is impossible for God." In the Chinese marriage folktale, actually, the princess ALONE could see the blue in the white because THROUGH LOVE & TRUST, HER FAITH LET HER SEE THE HIDDEN TRUTH. Tying this to Calyrex, and the mythicality of the blue rose, HE grants miracles THROUGH FAITH, FOR LOVE WITHOUT COST, selfless not sensual, BUT power schemes & doubt & the like BLOCK both his power AND will make him fade from sight! His love also cannot be forced. He can only bless through pure gift: notably the Reins, which REQUIRE A PETAL, a beautiful blue one that OBVIOUSLY is from a rose... a WILD ROSE. And it GLOWS.
✱ OH, BY THE WAY. The reason why the white rose alone can become blue is because it is HUMBLE = EMPTY OF SELF so it CAN HOLD THE UN-EARTHLY COLOR. All other roses are full of THEMSELVES = pride in their power, beauty, etc.: in their own merits. But you can't love like that... blue pigment DOESN'T EXIST IN NATURE. Blue ONLY exists AS LIGHT. So ONLY a white rose can BE blue, by BOTH RECEIVING & REFLECTING that blue light-- the color of heaven, UNATTAINABLE UNLESS GIVEN IN LOVE to a heart that is PURE enough to reflect something BESIDES ITSELF. The "Holy Grail" is holy BY HOLDING.
✱ If Calyrex's 8-bud garland truly is of ROSEBUDS, they symbolize UNAWAKENED LOVE, but a garland of roses symbolizes "THE CROWING REWARD FOR THE MERITS OF HOLY VIRTUE"... but remember, "Virtue is only virtue in extremis." Roses HAVE FRUIT when they bloom BUT "fruit flesh becomes soft AFTER A FROST." So there's a LOT to unpack. Unawakened love = 8 buds for HOPE & SALVATION = Calyx protecting from death by inclement weather = Those buds will only bloom AFTER A FROST that will ALSO allow their eventual fruit TO BE SOFT, SWEET, & EDIBLE-- not hard & bitter & inedible. ALL of this is a recipe for LOVE, humility, self-giving, perseverance in virtue, purity of heart, right relationship & communion, etc. This is the journey of Calyrex & his people... and ALL OF THE ROSES ARE BLUE. Their whole story is one of sheer generosity-- it's ALL GIVING & GIVING BACK, and being open to receive IN LOVE. The INSTANT ego & pride & complacency fill up gratitude's humble place, THE BLUE CAN'T GLOW.
✱ About rose hips: they eat them IN SCOTLAND for their ANTIOXIDANT properties that FIGHT DISEASE (Eternatus)! But the Scottish rose (petal match) is the wild DOG ROSE, said to soothe "rabid bites" (DYNAMAX) and its 5 petals representing the WOUNDS OF CHRIST. Roses are also "pain & sweetness" which is VERY CATHOLIC. You must be willing to SUFFER FOR LOVE.
✱ The bud-mantle Calyrex wears is also marked by little TRIPLE TRIANGLES; an obvious tie to the HOLY TRINITY & Their Love, Communion, & Generosity. They are pointing DOWN & are dark blue, blue-gray, & white at the heart-- the latter an also OBVIOUS CALLBACK to the Blue Rose myths. When the heart-- where the Spirit dwells-- is PURE & WHITE, humble & not trying to glorify itself with pigment (earthly color), then it is EMBRACED BY CHRIST, Who is WHITE-BLUE as the INCARNATE GOD-- the truly divine FUSION of white & blue, literally impossible in anyone BUT Him-- and His Life in/ through/ with ours is the BRIDGE to TRUE Blue... God Himself, Love itself, the "ever-unattainable" BUT ever-given in love.
✱ The Blue & White triangles point DOWN: a symbol of receptivity, the WOMB, & the CHALICE! We must RECEIVE the Spirit, THROUGH God's grace poured out in BAPTISMAL WATER (cup), for our soul, like Mary's womb, to CONCEIVE THE SON... Whose Blood FILLS the Chalice.
✱ CHRIST is an UPWARDS triangle because it is PASSION & the force of action, the SWORD OF TRUTH that can ONLY occur INCARNATELY. Thus ONLY Christ can hold this "masculine" vibe because its ties to energy & activity REQUIRE A BODY-- the "feminine" down-shape is more subconscious mystery, in how they operate. BUT, NOTE THAT THE "FATHER" TRIANGLE UNITES BOTH.
✱ Three-triangle patterns ALSO symbolize many trinities of existence, notably PAST/ PRESENT/ FUTURE & CREATE/ DESTROY/ PRESERVE for Calyrex's powers of psychic vision & abundance.
✱ Three as a number also symbolizes harmony, completeness, & new life, and triplets emphasize the importance of something. Applied to these symbols on the BUDS-- 8 meaning hope & salvation-- shows how our salvation & hope is ONLY complete THROUGH the Trinity working in our hearts, working as a PROTECTIVE CALYX as our souls mature into wholeness of new life in Him, blooming as blue roses of selfless love, colored by the Divine.
✱ Alchemically, the up & down triangles are the unity of fire & water: two things plants need to grow (fire's light) and symbolizing the unity of power & meekness, justice & mercy, etc. Calyrex's kind kingship exemplifies this.
✱ Triangles in general mean "growth into higher states of being," higher purpose, transformation, etc. This applies to both Calyrex's calling Glas/Spec & bringing harvest ot of famine, but also its trinitive aspect reminds us that ALL those good things can ONLY occur THROUGH GOD WORKING IN US. Triangles are always spiritual, it seems; not carnal.
✱ Those buds are arguably SIERPINSKY TRIANGLES, too-- SELF-SIMILAR FRACTALS: zooming in on ANY part of one reveals a PERFECTLY IDENTICAL COPY of the original. VERY EUCHARISTIC! Fractals are found all over nature, too: in three branches, snowflakes, flowers, cabbages, etc.! They are proof of Divine order & elegance-- "patterns that the laws of nature repeat at different scales... we see this basic principle repeated in the fractal structure of organic life forms... every tree branch is a copy of the one that came before it." (CHRIST = VINE = LIFE; ALL THINGS THROUGH/ WITH/ IN HIM!) A fractal is like, one big basic heart-form that keeps "self-replicating" at increasingly smaller scales until you can't even SEE the original, all-embracing shape-form anymore... but you see all its fractal copies, echoing its essence infinitely. THAT'S GOD & CREATION!!
✱ FURTHERMORE, the also-ubiquitous natural FIBONACCI SEQUENCE-- recurrent geometric patterns & numbers-- began with RABBITS and is most clearly seen in FLOWERS. Everything has this divine ratio & symmetry as its wholeness. I just love that. There's no "deep symbolism" other than its referring to Calyrex's species, the bud-triangles speaking of uncomparable life & abundance despite all famine & loss, and the innate reflection of God in all things, giving them true life. The greatest fractal in existence-- indeed, the clearest-- is the Eucharist, the BREAD OF LIFE. Christ, our true King, gives us Himself PERFECTLY & INFINITELY. Calyrex cannot & does not, but his generosity does at least reflect that miracle of heavenly abundance, and the triangles remind us WHO is the source & summit of that.
✱ At its heart, a fractal is the great guarantee of infinite life & abundance, through the eternal life, love, & generosity of God. Look at Jesus & the "fractal bread." Have faith, & He will sustain you despite all famine.
✱ CALYREX'S EYES ARE ALSO TRIANGLES. The iris is 3 TONED: pale blue, grey blue, dark blue-- and the pupil is WHITE. This of course hearkens back to the blue rose + fractal points, BUT! 4, Biblically, means completeness & perfection, notably in CREATION: the divine 3 plus the 1 "other" that He has made in Love! So for that to be CALYREX'S EYES immediately ties into his GIFT OF SIGHT: he can see all events, past & present & future! True sight is COMPREHENSION THROUGH FAITH, seeing by the same Light of the world that makes white roses blue, seeing His infinite Being in nature... and Calyrex uses this sight TO HELP OTHERS, that extra 4th color of pure white, of selfless humility & purity OF sight-- of understanding.
✱ His eye color is the REVERSE color of the buds, giving a vibe not of "becoming/ maturing" but instead of that 4's PERFECTION, of being spiritually cognizant of God in all BUT recognizing Him AS Him, first. Christ is again the bridge, but here, the Spirit's color is the outermost and it's ROUND?? Which lends itself to seeing His influence IN all things, AND people, THROUGH CHRIST. And all of this is again set in white-- the same purity of heart at the core is ALSO what unites it all, "as within so without," the Golden Rule.
✱ Some notes while reviewing Calyrex's Pokédex data (because this is a very fluid "document")-- flower "crowns" are for the triumphant & faithful, but Calyrex's isn't a pagan garland but a ROYAL CORONATION CROWN: a symbol not of award, but of SERVICE TO THE PEOPLE! And in heraldry, green is both nature & WISDOM. Hope & health & life are other associations. But BLUE is ALL ROYALTY & PIETY, TRUST & LOYALTY, patience & understanding & humility & peace. Also rare virtue? Wisdom & intuition are united in it, and it is surrounded by similar spiritually calm virtues. So for Calyrex's bud to be primarily green with a blue heart gives vibes of that "green" life & hope & health, connection to others & need of community (lushness of rainforests, rich in chlorophyll, PINE green that survives the cold & shelters others), being what PROTECTS & NURTURES the deeper heart-virtues of BLUE; trustworthiness, wisdom, peace, understanding, loyalty, piety, stability, spirituality, etc. In the spectrum, Green is the BRIDGE between "body & soul," the hue of pure natural life, bringing the holy color virtues to the more earthly tones. Blue is all about honor & truth, but is softer in tone than indigo, bringing a sense of gentleness & mercy & empathy despite its "ethereal" essence.
✱ Calyrex's blues are notably unique-- the palest is PERIWINKLE, a flower color that symbolizes new friendships, new beginnings, purity, strength, & eternal love. It is all about cherishing; that's all Calyrex (bless him). It's also hop, innocence, peace, kindness, protection, loyalty, devotion, comfort, etc. It's also the "Virgin flower," for MARY, the CHALICE OF GOD! The next blue is actually CORNFLOWER, another flower hue! Cornflowers are "very courageous, being able to stand strong against all the elements of nature." They are signs of unfailing hope, they're edible, and in Greek myth, they were said to-- AGAIN-- HEAL WOUNDS CAUSED BY POISON ARROWS. They are fragile in appearance but terrifically hardy. They can represent chaste love, purity, & blessedness; hope in love; fidelity, life, resilience, tenderness... AND MARY, who gave us the true "corn," the grain of Wheat from Heaven, to feed every heart forever. They are super medicinal, too, especially for tired eyes-- symbolic of relieving the soul, too, of long watching & waiting for hope & deliverance. They herald good fortune, and "each bloom is a blessing." They are said to notably wilt when one's true love is unrequited-- that, too, happened to poor Calyrex.
✱ The final, darker blue is, unsurprisingly, royal blue. Its first notable association is with "paranormal vision"-- seeing beyond the physical, into the "royal kingdom of God" which is only visible with the heart. It also is associated with INNER sight & wisdom, clarity & decisiveness. It opens the heart & mind with integrity. Like most blues, it is trustworthy, reliable, calm, and communicative, but all of this is enriched further by its REGAL aspect, that encompassing honor. In general, it's about DIGNITY & KNOWLEDGE, uprightness, fidelity, and the essence of both AUTHORITY & SPIRITUALITY, notably UNITED. Royal blue is serious but emotionally sincere & deep, conservative but respectful, professional but courteous & peaceful, humble yet kingly IN such virtue. So this is all obviously very applicable to Calyrex: he is a gentle, wise, trustworthy, solemn, & honest king, not aloof but not attention-seeking, etc. Remember: Blue is the color of HEAVEN so inevitably it will carry those virtues, AND making this last hue on the bud-triangles (and his eyes) ROYAL emphasizes the fact that ALL kingship is ordained BY GOD, FOR GOD, and IN GOD. The ONLY true King is CHRIST, so ALL earthly authority is spiritually OBLIGATED to imitate His example in reflecting His royal role! That Divine authority symbolized by Calyrex's royal blue AND its placement: His sight & knowledge come FROM God, and it is God Who protects & nurtures all blooming virtue in our souls. Lastly, Calyrex's cape (+WINGS) follow the same pattern as the buds-- interestingly, as they symbolize quite literally both his kingly role AND the holy "angel = messenger of God's plans & purpose" aspect: Calyrex's kingship is not for himself, but for others, in BLESSING THEM. The cape/wings are primarily PERIWINKLE, only bordered by royal blue-- putting the emphasis on FRIENDSHIP, PURITY, KINDNESS, & ETERNAL LOVE, which are ringed with HEALING & COURAGE and only tipped with REGALITY & HONOR. All these virtues are present in equal importance, BUT!! In his normal form they are small and almost decorative, mostly hidden behind his back, and LOOKING LIKE TEPALS: a sepal (protector) that resembles a petal. HOWEVER. This is interesting because, although Calyrex does have floral ties to both Peonies & Dog Roses (btw HELLO HERO DUO), this little addition of his wings adds elements of a LILY: notably the AGAPANTHUS, the "BLUE LILY," whose name means "FLOWER OF LOVE." Like cornflowers, they are tenacious and strong, symbolizing the heart's power & spiritual strength. Notably their blue color, associated with their name of love, emphasizes HEARTFELT & NOBLE LOVE.
✱ They are believed to PROTECT FROM STORMS (Eternatus) AND HEART DISEASE (Calyrex mends hearts), as well as signifying valiant & caring protection in general.
✱ Tying into Spectrier, Agapanthus is often used in FUNERALS, made into wreaths & placed on coffins to "represent the beautiful soul of the deceased"!
✱ And, again, it's a sign of purity, "fertility," beauty of soul, & loving relationships. They are ALSO tied medicinally to HEALTHY BABIES-- noted because flowers/ buds/ fruits are also reproductive.
✱ "Generosity of spirit" too! "AGAPE!"
✱ Note that Calyrex ISN'T wearing a CAPE (sleeveless), but a MANTLE!!! --and ONLY ON HIS STEED!!! By himself, he only appears to wear a BOLERO jacket. I note this solely because a "bolero" is a genre of song, "characterized by sophisticated lyrics dealing with love." It's all about heartfelt emotion, with a "beautiful singing melody," simple & purely romantic. It's like courtship; whereas the MANTLE is a symbol of AUTHORITY and POWER & RESPECT & PROTECTION, all Kingly aspects. The mantle "REQUIRES respect for the authority of the wearer," ESPECIALLY IN THE BIBLE: "there is no one in authority that GOD didn't put there!!" So HIS Power is working through them & protecting them. It is a GOD GIVEN power & authority that ONLY GOD CAN TAKE AWAY-- even if people disrespect it or forget or hate the king, GOD STILL SUSTAINS THEIR AUTHORITY, BY HIS WILL, FOR HIS PURPOSES. God also did this with PROPHETS-- their mantle was a tangible sign & proof that GOD CALLED THEM & they SPEAK FOR HIM. It is a sign of the HOLY SPIRIT upon them-- and for Calyrex, HE GETS WINGS TO SHOW THAT. This is why he continues to exercise power over his steeds, & has power to influence nature-- he's doing GOD'S CHARITABLE WORK, serving & blessing & healing others, with NO thought for himself-- he does assert his kingship, but NEVER demands or coerces obedience, or even loyalty, as it were-- his people lost faith and he did not retaliate; he respected THEIR free will-- for only freedom allows for GENUINE faith & loyalty & love. His power DID NOT DISAPPEAR-- it only was BLOCKED from affecting them, due to unbelief-- like Jesus & His miracles. SO. He manifests his mantle when his kingship CAN manifest, notably BY THE BOND OF UNITY with his steed-- no good & humble kind rules alone-- but he wears his "bolero" when alone, a symbol of SEEKING reciprocal love, of "romancing" his beloved people with sincerity & giving of himself. HE CANNOT RULE WITHOUT PEOPLE TO RULE, AND HE WILL NOT/ CANNOT RULE WITHOUT LOVING RELATIONSHIP.
✱ The "WINGS" are different too: his mantle has angelic/ bird wings, BUT his bolero has "fairy" or bug wings. Although yes, I consider them tepals in truth, the visual effect is still valid. Avoiding paganism, Calyrex's four tepal-wings resemble those of an iridescent beetle-- notably a JEWEL BEETLE. Not only is that an obvious reference to "CROWN JEWELS," the objects of metalwork & jewelry that "symbolize the particular power & continuity of the monarchy" (crown, sceptre, orb, sword, mace, ring, etc.) (BTW during coronation with these, they are ALSO ANOINTED WITH HOLY OIL!), but jewel beetle wings have been used AS ART for centuries, notably in RELIGION, for both their ethereal & unfading beauty (literally), but also for what they symbolize: beetles fly "between heaven & earth," dwelling in both, and they were used as FOOD-- notable because food = life, and eating something of such God-given yet humble beauty & flight was hoped to bestow such virtues upon the eater.
✱ In MANY shamanic societies, the beetle is mythically & profoundly linked to CREATION: their working with dirt balls evoked primordial "potter" themes & planet-shaping, in "retrieving/ shaping" that raw matter into shape. BUT note!! The beetle ONLY SHAPES, NOT CREATES! He's God's HELPER, in forming order out of chaos, & life out of death-- turning empty waste into a flourishing land. Very Calyrex! And the ball-pushing is WORK, spiritual work symbolically, but also LABOR FOR OTHERS, as the beetles do that FOR THEIR CHILDREN. In Egypt, this rolling is tied to the SUN, another life-giving symbol, yet ALSO tied to death in its setting, although still carrying the promise of sunrise. In his beetle wings, Calyrex evokes the essence of this "life cycle" with HARVESTS & HOPE, his ability & promise to work for others to bring blessings, his powers to make new life flourish AND help hearts "fly to higher things," the lasting beauty of SELF-GIVING, rebirth after suffering & apparent death (famine, Eternatus), the requisite of "dying to self" for the SOUL to be reborn "like the sun," ALSO BY THE SON, the spring after AND WITHIN winter. ALSO HEART SCARABS, focusing ALL of those virtuous things rightly in one's heart, not in any outer object, for all virtue comes from cooperation with God (the Divine)-- the One Who created life from dirt & can transmute ALL sorrows, & Whom the beetle "flies up to meet & bring His blessing down"-- MORE ANGEL VIBES! Honestly, there is SO MUCH Christ-parallelism with beetles in Egypt; it's notable, especially in its staggering humility... & overlooked beauty... & FOOD ASPECT, HELLO EUCHARIST = UNITY.
✱ Beetles were ALSO, like Christ, tied to DEATH as well as life, IN THE CONTEXT OF REBIRTH, & therefore also INITIATION = CORONATION in terms of being a "spiritual warrior," notably-- and all Kings carry a Sword.
✱ THERE'S MORE BLUE-DEER "SACRED ALTERATION" in that the scarab beetle was the "CUP OF DIONYSUS," relevant ONLY in the chalice & wine aspect, and the resulting "holy drunkenness" being a means of "communicating with the divine," noting wine's "inner fire" = HEART, & again lifting all this up to the Eucharist, a HOLY BANQUET given FROM SELF & ALTRUISTIC LOVE.
✱ HERE'S A KEY: THE SEMITIC PEOPLE WERE THE FIRST TO PORTRAY THE BEETLE WITH 4 WINGS = it being COMPLETENESS, only possible BY self-giving & communion with God & others, a holy paradox. AND. SAINT AMBROSE & OTHERS EQUATED THE BEETLE OF HABAKKUK 2:11 TO CHRIST, the true King & CREATOR! (Also Psalm 22:6 for His humility!)
✱ LASTLY, the beetle's "creator/ helper" myth was purified by this, in alchemical reference to Christ: the beetle was the "prima materia" of the great transmutable work of the soul, from dung to divine-- CHRIST was the "stone" created AFTER & BY HIS DEATH & RESURRECTION (SUN/SON), the jewel from the mire, the crown gem from the beetle's wing. This is the beautiful hope He gives us all, despite our wretchedness, and this great hope of life from death, of flying from dirt into heaven, from emptiness to fullness, is the King's promise bestowed on Calyrex to carry, the blessing of both physical & spiritual rebirth & growth into ever-lovelier things. Beetles are all about CHANGE!!
✱ As for the angel-mantle having those LONG GREEN ENDS, they simply remind me of EVERGREEN enedles... notably YEW. THERE'S A YEW, IN WALES, IN A CHURCHYARD, which is one of the OLDEST TREES IN THE WORLD. Like 5000 years! That's VIRTUALLY CANON with the sacred tree in Freezington!
✱ Yews, again, are symbols of LIFE & DEATH, said to transfer longevity to the warrior who used weapons of its wood, and said to protect against evil, notably against the devil himself.
✱ They resprout from a dying trunk = rebirth, but their RED BERRIES are lethally toxic = DEATH!
✱ CHURCHYARD YEWS are especially sacred, through prayer & proximity-- with weapons OR branches from it being vanquishers of evil. They decorated places of worship, reaching up to God yet rooted in the earth-- like the Church herself-- and its longevity a hope for eternal life in Christ, crucified on a tree, dotted with "red berries of blood."
✱ Some even say that the Cross WAS a yew!! This is fitting, as ancient cultures associated yews with death, funerals, sorrow, mourning, etc. It was also said to "draw out the poisons from the air" in graveyards, warding off evils. So it is treated with solemn honor in this "memento mori" respect.
✱ BUT. Remember that it is ALSO RESURRECTION, which requires death first!! Their presence, however melancholy in some respects, are also POWERFULLY HOPEFUL, living reminders of life AFTER death. Extracts from their bark have even been proven to fight cancerous tumors (DYNAMAX)!!
✱ BTW those berries AREN'T TOXIC TO DEER OR RABBITS.
✱ Their bark can withstand unlimited clipping & shaping-- metaphorically with Calyrex, no amount of "reshaping" his memory or "clipping" his power could damage him; the yew's wood is SOFT & grows slowly, giving it great strength & resilience.
✱ OH, and that ANCIENT Fortingall Yew was once used by locals to carve out DRINKING CUPS: "quaich" cups, inspired by ancient BLEEDING VESSELS-- even MORE Eucharist/ Cross connections-- even morseo as these quaichs are used as signs of FRIENDSHIP & WELCOME in community gatherings.
✱ There is an old legend that the yew was also the BURNING BUSH (sent by God to DELIVER HIS PEOPLE from slavery & starvation) & the tree "of Golgotha, growing FROM ADAM'S GRAVE." That's more death/ life, which is ALL super fitting as Calyrex ONLY wears his yew-like mantle ON HIS STEEDS, who are VERY death-associated BUT who paradoxically BOOST Calyrex's life abilities-- that's resurrection! "This is the tree of glory," BECAUSE Christ worked His redemption FROM one.
✱ Evergreens in general speak of life undying despite death (winter); BUT they have NEITHER fruit NOR flowers! Calyrex's ties to the yew are small yet significant BUT ONLY IN THE CONTEXT OF HIS MANTLE-- his sign of HOLY & PIOUS AUTHORITY. He is not immortal, nor is he so directly tied to death-- BUT that mantle gives him a SOLID RESURRECTION MISSION, something even greater than his life-blessing gifts.
✱ This is ALSO different from his beetle wings as they represent the JOURNEY TO & COOPERATION TOWARDS resurrection-- they do not herald it so immediately as the yew & its ties to the CROSS!
✱ Next up-- his last color! It's actually NOT straight-up gray; it appears to be IVORY, or even cream? But either way it's a WARM tiny, not a cold or neutral one, but its subtle enough to, again, give that vibe of gentle hope. Ivory in general is pure & comforting & soft, good balancing qualities for the authority of blue & formality of dark green. It's sophisticated, elegant but simple, pleasant & unassuming, but never harsh, aloof, or obtrusive. it's also close to BEIGE, which often gets a bad rap for being "boring," but it fits his humble nature perfectly. Beige is loyal & dependable, reliable & practical & constant. Predictability is not a bad thing when it concerns virtue, & the comfort sought by those in tumult & turmoil! And this is his BODY color-- not his flowers or bud or wings-- it's his own natural heart's purity. AND THAT IS WHAT BECOMES HIS ANGELIC MANTLE: could ANYONE truly serve God, or seek to work as His messenger, if they were not so humble of heart & poor in spirit?
✱ Ivory is "understated elegance," "a place of refuge," gentle warmth, reverence & humility, etc.
✱ In many images, though, Calyrex's color is more of a silvery GRAY. That color is "the perfect neutral," calming extremes & balancing between absolutes. It is intelligent & diplomatic, refined & dignified, authoritative & wise-- the virtuous benefits of "gray hair," as it were. Gray is reasonable, agreeable, sophisticated, and serious. It is "the soul of all color," and "a gray day provides the best light." It is a stable "middle ground" of clarity & prudence, free from wilder emotions. It makes all other colors glow without overwhelming. Gray "doesn't lead with emotions," is mature & stable, "solid as a rock" & therefore a safe soothing haven for turbulent & aggravated hearts. It avoids attention and publicity (private), but will offer practical insight to all who ASK. Gray can "overthink"-- Calyrex's massive noggin!-- because it sees AND UNDERSTANDS "both sides" so clearly. But it will never force anything, being supremely patient & still, maybe even too much-- it can miss opportunities to act? It is deeply self-reflective BUT needs help from brighter colors to take more active decisions according to it. Despite this, its "dynamic humility" makes it the "ideal authority figure," honoring & respecting others & always acting with equity, integrity, & candor. Lastly, gray can be grim; it does not deny darkness; but it also always holds on to the light.
✱ Calyrex is LIGHT GRAY which is MUCH more soothing & even hopeful than darker shades. Calyrex is arguably almost WHITE, too-- emphasizing "lighter" virtues while still preserving gray's roots-- and the warmer, ivory/ beige overcast is a perfect finishing touch for this king, making him approachable, personal, & amiable, but not overly so-- he is still private & unassuming. His neutrals are therefore the perfect complement to his dark blues & greens, adding levity & a touch of warmth without burning, and without stifling or muting them either-- the snowy gray even HIGHLIGHTS the "life-giving" hues in quiet contrast!
✱ One last color bit that I forgot before: the bud on his head DOES look like a PERSIMMON, and I still theorize it being a "FRUIT BUD" connecting him to the Dynamax tree & its fake, toxic "harvest"... notable because the Persimmon is also known as the "FRUIT OF THE GODS" or "DIVINE FRUIT"-- in this context, an EXPLICIT warning against the idolatry of power & self-worship, & another mini sermon about CHRIST being "THE VINE" apart from which NO FRUIT can grow in a soul, with the BLUE ROSE & PEONY/ PEYOTE ties emphasizing the elements of pure love & gracious healing.
✱ When RIPE they are nutritious & sweet; when UNRIPE they are BITTER, SOUR "CHOKE FRUITS". Pride has no humility or patience & you WILL choke on its impatient, immature, inedible "fruits."
✱ Persimmons symbolize PERSEVERANCE & HARDY ENDURANCE, as they thrive in many soils & can survive SUBZERO TEMPERATURES!! They are also DROUGHT TOLERANT & RESIST PESTS & DISEASE to a great extent. They are signs of "increased blessings" in one's endeavors, and their sweet beauty promotes joy & peace. The trees are ABUNDANT in fruit, promising prosperity, especially with its durability, and the branches are a protective home for small & weak creatures.
✱ They also represent TRANSFORMATION, ENLIGHTENMENT, & PRUDENT JUDGMENT-- this last bit as their inner-shape was said to PREDICT WINTER WEATHER!
✱ There are ISRAELI PERSIMMONS (Christ's land) that are ALWAYS SWEET, even when hard. They are called "SHARON FRUITS," after the Biblical plain, which was "proverbially fertile" & known for its ABUNDANT FLOWERS, and referenced in the Song of Songs with the "ROSE OF SHARON"-- a beautiful flower that grows in dry, unfavorable conditions, and whose delicate beauty was matched only by its HUMILITY, despite being a "lily among thorns" for that very fact. But this flower refers to CHRIST-- the bridegroom, the King of flowers, giving Himself to us in a gesture of totally committed love, unique in rarity & beauty & perfection. And, again, this desert rose was ALSO a HEALING flower, making this gift even more benevolent & selfless.
✱ Connecting these virtues to the persimmon-- notably since Calyrex's is GREEN, symbolizing "immaturity" & need of growth into wisdom-- shows that ONLY CHRIST gives us WISDOM & SPIRITUAL FRUIT, which requires LOVE & HUMILITY to receive.
✱ This "unripe green" is only tangential though as the INNER color is BLUE. So the TRUE fruit is ripe with HEAVEN'S color, but it is still in its green calyx because NO ONE BUT GOD HAS PERFECT WISDOM. Even if He gives us the fruit, it is paradoxically "never fully ripe," always needing more grace & patience to become more full of truth-- a process that terminates only IN heaven. So the "blue" impossible color hearkens to that unattainability, as does the blue rose: their fullness is ONLY tangible, whole, & accessible THROUGH PURE & HUMBLE LOVE.
✱ A note on Ravel's Bolero (as in the jacket)-- "the repeated theme & slow build has been called an 'exercise in hypnotism.'" It is "nostalgic, sweet, & quietly complex." Being a LOVE song, the repetition shows persistence in its devotion, & the slow build shows how, like fruit & flowers, true love sweetens & matures over time, with fidelity-- it is no wild, sudden infatuation. The "nostalgia" also refers to the people in Freezington reminiscing on when they knew & loved Calyrex, after they had become "hypnotized" by his constancy & forgotten how precious it was-- had forgotten to reciprocate or be grateful, their hearts lulled into complacency. They weren't truly listening-- for although the tune & harmony stay the same, more & more instruments come in over time, enriching the orchestration & adding flourishes of color to the heartbeat of a theme. Like the cycles of seasons & harvests, predictable & repetitive & slow, there is nevertheless always a new joy to it, a new sweetness, dear in its familiarity yet never quite the same twice. Love is not novelty, but fidelity, a solid prism for the light of grace. Itself it does not change, but every tiny shimmer of light casts new yet familiar rainbows. This is true, committed, joyful & grateful relationship. It is the "bolero" of perpetual courtship, of the core of love recognized by all yet always new, always returning even sweeter. Ravel himself disliked the bolero, claiming it had "no music in it" due to its repetition-- but isn't life itself repetition, cycle, pattern? And it IS music. Calyrex's little jacket is a little reference to the loving reliability of the harvest, but also of winter. Wisely, he heralds both, but with the inherent reassurance that spring will return, that hopes will be fulfilled, and that life cannot be stopped. Neither can love, and its power to GIVE life.
✱ Hares in general are a symbol of vitality, rebirth, & resurrection-- life & fertility, spring & autumn. The white color is for chastity & purity, removing all unsavory connotations. They are also PREY animals-- more self = food symbolism. In Egypt they are notably tied to the life/ death/ rebirth cycle too. Some myths see them as "spirit messengers," bringing wisdom from heavenly realms. They represent attention & contemplation with their ears & watchful nature. They are mild, humble, lucky, & good-natured, solitary yet auspicious, resourceful & clever. They can also be tricksters; there's definitely a hint of this in Calyrex's sense of humor.
✱ BUT! He is also PART DEER. They are typically seen as spiritual & mystical.


(black apples, avalon)
(GRAIL (+ calyx/ sepal))
(↑KING ARTHUR (+ ZACIAN??))
(CELEBI ties? vision + element typing)

new therapist, second appointment

notes from paper immediately after session ended:

★PRINT STUFF! she needs basic refs!!
★ start bringing morpheus everywhere again and taking AUDIO NOTES on everything notable that day/ moment. we are losing so much info from work and from daily life because we're not recording it fast enough, and then dates+details get lost. that isn't good!


drawing= gave us markers. drew tree, house, person (no face!!)
realized we were drawing SYMBOLS. inherently empty.
THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T "JUST DRAW"; subject needs a context/life in it?
we cannot draw "a" person, or "a" house-- those are empty concepts! BUT we can draw a specific person or house, and the detail+effort jumps SIGNIFICANTLY as well because we are trying to portray a truth.
BUT that very fact includes heavy responsibility of proper representation. this can be overwhelming, often terrifying. why we don't like drawing people; it's like a photo legend, you're "capturing a bit of their soul" in that and you CAN'T LIE. therefore the thought of making a mistake in representing them isn't just a "visual error," it's a LIE in the same way the young wizards books tell it and that is HUGE.
is that true?
either way, we need a way to manage that better so we CAN draw again.

julie fronted, talked a little.
therapist let us then draw anything= we drew a shining heart, a pink lotus (julie drew), leaves/swirls, stars (lynne drew, having lots of fun)

talked about Spectrum. MOST CENTRALITES SPOKE UP.
javier= surprised us that he came out; spoke a bit about red? barely fronted though; he's not comfy with talking outside yet so i'm just aware he was there, not what he said. i can still feel lingering pain in him over the reset of dec 2013? and how that damaged red. HELP HIM HEAL.
lynne= all the orange talk. true to her description, she was very easy to talk to and very merry in her disposition; honestly of everyone upstairs she probably has the least trouble fronting on a dime and talking to TOTAL STRANGERS. most internal people don't even know how to front in social contexts, but lynne just comes right out smiling.
josephina= trying to correctly describe yellow; mentioned how it is tied to the "screaming" feeling (not anger, JUST screaming, like a blind hell sound) and anxiety, BUT that it shouldn't be "defined" by that heavy negativity? said he was trying to emphasize the goodness of yellow-- sunlight, flowers, things like that. but said it was still a difficult process.
nathaniel= describing green as a sort of "neutral" color in the system? notably, "not gray neutral;" said green was HORIZONTAL and gray was VERTICAL? in terms of their balancing feeling. green was like an expanse of grass; a safe and comforting and calm "baseline" for everything to rest upon/within? like that's green, that very feeling of "safe rest."
leon= describing the vibe of the indigo realm, trying to put into similar words the feeling of that color in and of itself-- mentioned the fog and snow and quiet, and the dusky color, but said it was NOT negative or depressing or oppressive? said it was that sort of "before night" feeling, there's a life to it, even in that silence; indigo is about COMPREHENSION in the "inner sight" way? hard to verbalize. it's understanding something, not a "lightbulb moment" but more of a "getting the truth" in a more solid, permanent click. settling in. but the indigo vibe itself is all about being tuned into that discernment and openness of mind and such. also mentioned "indigo is SCALES" and touched his necklace. still not sure how that applies exactly?
laurie= out for a short time; she has trouble just "chatting" and wasn't quite sure how to express herself so quickly. i know she was trying to describe the feeling of violet but it's so powerful, both in its nature and in what it means to her, she couldn't find the words. i remember mentions of it being "like a soldier" but with devotion/ dedication/ protection, how it was that sense of "giving your life for something" out of that same ardor and compassion? but violet is also independent in that it "evangelizes" or something??? in how violets will actively go out and help/ teach/ guide others without making themselves a teacher in the school-like sense; they're more like "voices in the desert?" i remember that concept being totally under-described, we don't have the ready vocabulary for it yet. but it's very important.
julie= besides her drawing, i don't recall what she said? i know she was describing pink as being feminine and soft and pure and caring, but besides that general known info i don't know what else was disclosed.
eros= made it very clear that cerise was "lustless sensuality" and that this was DEEPLY IMPORTANT to us, not just as a system/ as individuals inside, but also in how we interacted with the ENTIRE OUTSIDE WORLD. we do need to talk about this more, it's so important
sherlock= no idea? he mentioned it was data and knowledge, and i think he revisited nathaniel's "balance" bit, but he didn't front for long.
waldorf tried to talk but couldn't, kyanos peeked in and maybe said a few words?
spine, infinitii, and jay DID NOT FRONT OR TALK.

we found it interesting that the colors we couldn't make with markers-- lime and aqua-- were the two colors that STILL had no Centralites assigned to them, and which still felt unstable.
PLEASE GO INSIDE AND FIGURE THIS OUT ASAP.

wattson talked mainly this session?

"definitive person" concept for colors? i.e. "if a person perfectly embodied the attributes of this color, what would they be like?" lynne described orange!
orange is warmth and ebullience and "the kind of person who lights up a room" and "could befriend everyone in a room full of strangers" etc. like our dad, but with an extra "gregarious" (key word!) warmth.
interesting because orange isn't social for the sake of being social?? like oranges are perfectly fine being alone? they're just always a hearth. kind to animals and children, take care of houses, always smiling. "big guy" build vibe, like a gentle giant without the shyness. we NEED to type about this stuff more in depth, it's fascinating

BLACK is "safe" motherly because it is "SPACE"/ a concept field, NOT A PERSON!!!
pink is NOT motherly, it's virginal?? too clear/pure.
(white= "true masculinity?" NO ADULTS concept)

talked briefly about system levels, socials + context locks, faceless/nameless phenomenon, socials having no sense of self, SELF ONLY EXISTING IN A VACUUM???

going home= abusive; "it's an abusive place SO we abuse ourself there"
HOLDING PATTERN (inescapable social mode??)
we have NO addictions away from home? if we're on the road all day we don't even THINK about harming ourself, EVER. but automatically when we walk in the door, that automated addiction starts IMMEDIATELY.
WE NEED TO REDEFINE THE CONTEXT OF THE HOUSE.

tied to symbol-drawing of house: therapist asked what it'd be like to live there, we said "you couldn't;" it was just a depiction. BUT, if you could, it would feel like a very anxious 'interim.' like you weren't supposed to live there. it was just a "standby place," someplace unfit for "living in." thought that was interesting.

talked about razor, the jewels, sylvain in brief.

COLORS!!!!❤



questions to ask ourself in the aftermath of mistakes/ missteps/ bad situations:

1. what did you do right?
2. what could you have improved?
3. what were you aware of?
4. what would you do differently?
5. what would you do the same?

 

 

 

I am devastatingly depressed.
I haven't updated in days (feels like weeks) because frankly I just don't care much about anything anymore. I'm too tired. I don't have the strength to get out of bed. The only time I feel anything close to alive anymore is when I run, and thanks to this surgery I can't even do that for more than 30 minutes without pain.

My memory is getting worse. It's making things tough. Today I forgot that fruit hurts, and I ate an entire apple. The wave of grinding pain and nausea was a total shock at first, as I had no idea why it was there. It took me a good five minutes to remember that "oh yeah, apples have been painful to eat for two years now."
I forgot the other brother, the older one. He moved out sometime, a long time ago. He used to live here and I don't remember what that was like, or who he was. It's unsettling in a vague way, but I'm too tired to care.

I hurt too much. I want to vomit until I'm empty. I'm tired of the stomach and chest and head pain. I woke up almost every hour last night, so nauseous I was shaking. I can't remember the last time I felt rested.
I had nightmares again, the bland ones that are defined by existential annulment. In it I was driving, I got lost, had to walk home without shoes or much clothing, and when I got there the family acted like I wasn't even there. That's common. I wonder about the driving; every time I'm in a car in dreams I get hopelessly lost or, if someone else is driving, we get in an awful accident. But driving dreams are rare, except I've had like seven in the past two weeks. I wonder.

Is this bad, to talk about the bad things?
It's just so hard to focus on the "good" because currently, my perspective is so warped, it considers everything "bad." It considers everything a punishment or a sin. It's f*cked up, if you'll please forgive my language. It's just the only thing that sounds ugly enough to match this situation.
The voices won't stop. I am so tired of them. I am so tired. I actually considered going on medication to get them to shut up, but I know what that did to us last time.
"Us." That damned, saving word.

My therapist has either gotten too soft, or I've gotten too smart (again). I have a bad history with therapists, because I used to read psychology books for fun as a teen, and learned how to pick my own brain better than they ever could. So I know exactly what buzzwords to say and avoid, I know what body language they look for, I know what symptoms to hide or emphasize, I know too much. I play them like a harp.
The problem is that therapists aren't supposed to "get involved" like Laurie. I cannot tell you how horrible it is to end up in a self-destructive loop during a therapy session, trying to claw myself out of it and only being unable to because that horrid woman is staring at me. Just like that man before her. Staring. That makes it so much worse it's disgusting, because that sustained blank eye contact puts the body into "social mode" while my brain is in "you're a disgusting whore who doesn't deserve to live" mode, so I end up catatonic and silent. Then the therapist says, "what are you thinking about?" And I don't say anything, because that's the right answer. But a more bitter part of me wants to scoff and spit and tell them "nothing, you idiot, that's the whole problem!!" Can't they pick up on clues? Can't they think outside of the DSM-V? Or are they just as tightly programmed to "follow the rules" as I had to be on the job? It makes me sick.

I want to talk to Laurie, but the solution already negates the problem. The problem is that I am too suicidally depressed to care about heartspace. Acknowledging her presence would already mean I was okay enough to not need to talk. So we go back and forth, between bloody blinded sparkle-eyes and bleached-out corneas. Extremes.
I talked about that in therapy last week, I remember. How black+white does not equal gray, to me, and never did. It's the most exasperating, frustrating thing in the world. I cannot escape from the extremist mindset as long as I am fighting it, because that fighting keeps me trapped in that mindset. See? Gray is its own thing, a neutral perspective that sees clearly. I wonder if Sherlock would swap. I'm tired. I really am tired.

I'm splintered enough to switch colors, I'm sure. I realized that the other day. I realized that the reason I keep name-slipping with myself is because I dissociate so totally, so easily, around others, that I think a third-person perspective of my own alleged form is normal. When it hit me that that boy was acting the way I knew I should be acting, or at least would be if I had written the script, just like Jewel's outspacer adventures in elementary school… I knew that we were different, somehow.
Did I ever mention that? We were so used to that depersonalization, for so long, that we didn't realize it wasn't "normal," for lack of a better term. Jewel knew who she was, she would write down what happened to the letter, with herself and others. But the person writing those things was not her. Same with me. I, the one "watching myself," am not that boy, that loving boy. Somehow. I'm not even sure if he's real, or if he's just a projected splinter yet, a conscious psyche-split, like Cannon and Eros before him.


(ended suddenly)