the spectrum heart cathedral system

Honest but odd question.

I have been endeavoring to attend daily Mass for about a month now, often twice a day, whenever possible. However I fear my mental health & living situation are worsening. Is this spiritual warfare, or am I being punished for somehow receiving the Eucharist unworthily? Can someone as sick and stupid as me ever be properly disposed to receive Him? Do I have a mortal sin I am unaware of?

I feel like I cannot attend Mass often enough. Often I will leave one Mass, joyful, then realize I cannot make it to a second due to problems with time or distance, and weep uncontrollably. I feel like my soul is starving to death. I want to live in a church. I miss God so much when I'm at home; I'm so miserable and wretched and sinful, it feels as if I could drink an entire font of holy water and never be clean. I want to be a good girl but all my best efforts fail, and the paltry things I do are never good enough or properly executed. I'm stupid and selfish and a whiny crybaby with anger issues and one very broken brain & body, and my family hates it. No wonder I can't receive Holy Communion properly; I can't even communicate with my own family. If I'm suffering a great deal here but it's sinful suffering, trapped in illness, will I be damned to hell because "well you obviously like living this way or you would have changed things!"? What is mercy supposed to achieve if justice demands I pay my weight in blood here? I should be punished for my idiocy and forgetfulness. Otherwise I will become even more evil I'm sure. But I'm so afraid of justice, because I deserve to die and I don't want to die as a filthy stinking monster. I want to be good but I don't know how. I feel incapable.

This is becoming a ramble but there is a great deal of pain in my heart and I feel like God is fed up with me too. I'm so afraid, such a stupid wretched ugly thing, good for nothing. I want to be good but don't know how and I feel so unloved and I'm losing all will to live. Please pray for me, whatever that entails.

I will likely delete this in the morning. Thank you for your patience, and I apologize.

We have to be like little children in every challenge-- clearly aware of our helpless ignorance, but humbly so, and joyfully surrendering to our trusted parent's direction when we don't understand.

There's a pure joy in knowing that we cannot "figure it out" and don't ever have to, because God knows and He is orchestrating it all flawlessly. That radical surrender of love brings a deep peace even in the worst storms, no matter how they rage. Remember this. God is the safest haven. Stay close beside Him, like a tiny child, and all will be well.

Christ started His Church with fishermen-- proud, obstinate, sinful, knavish imbeciles just like us. Yet He loved them passionately, and He died for them, and He gave them the keys to His Kingdom. Such grace could only be bestowed by grace; no human could ever merit such divine blessing, let alone such common sinners. But Christ chose them. Christ chose us. We are surviving by God's grace alone and that is both terribly humbling and joyously grand. Like Saint Paul, may we rejoice in our poor humanity, so that the divine power of God can shine all the more clearly by it!

------------------------

Attack the roots of your sinful struggles; don’t beat yourself up. Sin comes from a wounded soul. Heal that wound! Christ was all about that. He will always help you do the same.
 

 
 
  

Red Lights : Vatican
France-based photographer Aishy shares shots of The Basilica di San Pietro, in the heart of the Vatican, under a new glance, a new light.
 

Divine Mercy hues. 🩸❤💙💧
We are washed by the water, we are saved by the Blood.

This red light also reminds us that the very Heart of God is present here, in the heart of the Vatican, in every celebration of the Eucharist. The blue of Divinity marries the red of Humanity in perfect love. It is a profound, gorgeous, terrible mystery, that God Himself can and is touched and felt and shared and seen here. The beauty of these photographs is a shockingly dim reflection of that greater joy. Be grateful, be humble, be joyful at that. We are incomprehensibly blessed.

"When you put those two things side by side—the naked fact that “God is” and that “you are"—letting the two exist together in quiet contemplation, you have entered the deepest, simplest mystery of prayer. "Take the good, gracious God, just as he is, without qualification, and bind him, as you would a poultice, to your sick self, just as you are.”"

Belden C. Lane, The Solace of Fierce Landscapes: Exploring Desert and Mountain Spirituality

There is nothing more to add to this beautifully phrased & intimately profound truth, other than the sincere entreaty to pray like this as often as possible.

Just… be there, heart thrown wide and aching open, in that silent recognition. Hold yourself close and quiet to Him like a tired and teary-eyed child clinging to his loving father. Just be there. You will feel the cosmic depth of it, and the utter simplicity of it. And God will speak unspoken Truth to your small yet such-beloved heart.

And you must live there. There is all peace, there is all joy, there is all love.


 

“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.”
(Isaiah‬ ‭43:18-19‬)
 

When your past feels utterly wrecked, and your present utterly desolate, remember this. God wants you to look to Him instead of over your bruised shoulders. He wants you to look in trust, in wonder, in hope so keen it aches. Yes, you are in great sorrow and pain, but look! There is an oasis in the desert. Look! There is life blooming amidst the frozen rocks. Look! God is kissing your wounds. He is recreating you in love. No matter what you were before, no matter what you did… now, God is doing a new thing– He is doing it in you, for you!

Where you see only desolation, God sees an opportunity to work a miracle. His power is made perfect in weakness. Give Him your wastelands, and look– He shall fill them with flowers.

"Whenever we have the opportunity, we should do good to everyone." (Galatians 6:10)

Keep your heart open to those opportunities, and you will see them everywhere– they are like glittering yet hidden diamonds waiting to be revealed and shared.

But be warned– if you grumble over the possibility of suffering to do good, over complaints of inconvenience and impatience and indignities, then you will miss thousands of priceless spiritual gems… your hardened heart will see everything, like itself, as a dulled rock.

Let love break that stone so you can shine. Start small, start sincerely. Even the tiniest jewel is inherently precious. Do good, always and everywhere, and watch the world around you begin to sparkle with the light of God.

Anonymous asked,

Hello, I am asking if you could please pray for me? I had a hallucination/waking dream last night or maybe a real spiritual event but I doubt it--in which a demon tried to attack me and I just want to know that people of God have my back. Thank you. God Bless

 

Dear sibling in Christ, as someone who also experiences such demonic torments, I will absolutely pray for you with empathetic sincerity.

Do not lose heart. Many saints have suffered at the hands of the devil. No matter what he or his minions do, however, Christ has your back. More than anyone else, He is there for you, even if He does not intervene directly. He has His holy purposes; all He allows is meant to help you grow in holiness and virtue, to conform your soul more closely to His. Satan hates our Lord– therefore he also hates His people. But he cannot and will not win, as long as you endure in faith. Take courage.

In any case, many prayers are being said for you, for mercy and deliverance, for strength and consolation. Saint Michael the Archangel, we particularly recommend this soul to your mighty care and protection. Saint Joseph, terror of demons, pray for them and stand by them. Mary, Queen of Angels, chase the fallen ones away! Stay with this soul as a mother who always defends and comforts her children. We ask all this in the name of Jesus Christ our sovereign Lord. Amen.

"Wherever I am, as soon as I raise the eyes of my heart in my affliction to God, the Lover of men immediately answers my faith and prayer, and the sorrow immediately departs. He is at every hour near me, only I do not see it, but I feel it vividly in my heart. Sorrow is the death of the heart and it is the falling away from God."

- St John of Kronstadt

Let suffering & sorrow bring you closer to Christ, by motivating heartfelt & fervent prayer– but pray with faith, and humble surrender nevertheless! Jesus longs to comfort you, even if the affliction does not abate. He will still bring His peace into your heart, true and unshakable, and that closeness to Him is what shall soothe all sorrow.

Do not fall into self-pity or despair; they will choke your soul. Instead, like a child in pain seeking its mother, run immediately to The Lord, Who Loves you. In this, even your worst afflictions will become gates to holy joy– through love they will take you to the Cross, where your pains unite bittersweetly with His, with Life Himself Who will deliver you thus from spiritual death. Fear not!

We typically have no idea what God is doing, in those scary times. We’re frightened, confused, and hurting. But God is holding you in His Hands even then, especially then, when everything but Him is powerless and at a loss. God’s glory is made manifest all the more stunningly in weakness. We know this from Saint Paul, but do we believe this?

Begin by thanking God for everything. It’s radical trust, radical surrender, radical love. And it will bring you the most profound peace.

In trouble,– today especially– I pray like this:

“God, I’m scared and upset and I’m distressed by what is happening… but I trust You. I know that Your Will is Good, and I want to surrender to it despite my fears. Help me to do that by Your grace. Help me to rest in Your Love and care, especially when I cannot see it clearly at work. Strengthen my faith in You during this time. I unite my sufferings to those of Christ Your Son in reparation for my sins. I thank you for this grace. I thank you for Your purposes in allowing these things to happen, however difficult, for You have a plan. I thank You for keeping me safe in Your plan despite my wretchedness, and for loving me so much that nothing in this world can separate me from You, no matter how terrible it may be. I thank You for everything, because I love You too, feebly but sincerely, and I do not fear Your Good Will. I trust You. Thank you for all of this. Amen.”

Just… pour your heart out to God. Center on your love for Him, and on His Love for you, and gratitude will flow out from your soul like a river.

Thank You, God, for everything, everything. Thy Will Be Done.

semperreformanda:

God holds all things together.

Rest.

Everything is under His loving control. He’s got you covered.

Be at peace, like a child in his Father’s arms. Rest there by His Heart.

As He holds you, so He holds the universe.


 

kweza-deactivated20221020:

at some point, you have to realise that all you can do for a hardened soul is pray for them. you don’t have the power to transform heart but God does.

Arguably, that prayer also has great merit because it can only spring from genuine humility– recognizing that I am not God, I cannot change them, I have no control or power nor should I. You must surrender them, and yourself, entirely into God’s care and good will.

Furthermore, this shift from “I must save them!” to “only God can save them” MUST be motivated by love and mercy. You are not “abandoning” a loved one’s hardened heart to the Lord– how could that heart’s Creator ever abandon it?– rather, you are relinquishing your desperate grip on it, so that He can hold it to His own Heart and soften it in a way no human ever could. To admit this exclusive grace is to also hope for it. We cannot see Love without Love first being in us, too, by that same grace.

But I continue with a warning. If, when you stop trying to save someone and “put it in God’s hands,” you fail to pray for them, OR you are begrudging in your loss of attempted saviorship– then you are being motivated by pride and that will drag your soul down into hardness with nauseating speed. “Love your enemies” is a paradox because, when you love someone– love, not necessarily like; there is a difference– they are no longer an enemy, but a lost friend. If you are so offended by your inability to transform them as such with your own power, they will never be loved by you, not in any truth. But when you choose to love them anyway, even with no outward transformation or sign, then– by God’s grace in your soul– they are nevertheless, despite all hell, a friend that you want to meet in heaven.

That’s how we must pray for our ‘enemies’. In fact, no one is our enemy but Satan. Every human being that has ever hurt you is just a lost and stumbling sheep– just like you. Forgive them, beloved, as Christ forgave you– for their soul, too, is beloved to God. Be humble, be merciful, be hopeful, be loving. Put them in God’s care, and tell Him how much you love them and desire their salvation– not for your own sake, but for His, because they may never convert in this life until the last moment. You may never be on “friendly terms” with them until heaven. No matter. Love hopes all things, with no self-interest, and rejoices in the salvation of all, for the love of God Who Is Love.

Pray for those who persecute and insult and hate you. Pray for their hearts to be delivered from evil and brought to God. Pray for all souls to know His mercy, especially those who need it the most. God can soften even a heart of steel. Have faith in this, and pray.

Renunciation of Peter (Fragment), 1311, Duccio di Buoninsegna

He still has his halo, but it is obscured– even as his feet are stretched out towards the flame. There is a powerful sermon in those details alone.

catholic-persephone:

To my fellow Christians, do you guys think we should reply or talk back (not harshly, but just to state or correct) professors during classes? And also to participate in general presenting another point of view? Or should we remain as the others and just pretend we are also insane and agree with everything?? Lol

As G.K Chesterton wisely said: “You cannot love a thing without wanting to fight for it.” In other words, we must be willing to defend the honor of our beloved, or we have no honest right to call them beloved.

I, too, decry the use of harshness and similar rudeness in our responses to others, especially those in authority. Like Christ, we must speak firmly but gently, respectfully but with integrity. We must not bend to spiritual cowardice or laxity.

If we feel our conscience prickling in response to a professor’s statement– or anyone’s statement, regardless of professional context– we have a moral duty TO act upon that and speak up– again, not for our own sake, but for the sake of our Christian faith. Likewise, participation in the general “sharing of viewpoints” is arguably critical in this confused and relativistic age, when your voice may be the only one willing or able to contribute a Christian viewpoint.

Pretense is a form of dishonesty, and an insidiously corruptive one at that. All dishonesty comes from the evil one. The world is mournfully insane enough; to surrender yourself even to the appearance of it is arguably a sin of omission with gravely dampening effects on the Spirit’s fire in your soul. Enough pretense and you will forget the truth of who you are, which is ultimately anchored in Christ. So too does an admittedly spineless “agreeing with everything” attitude cloud your moral compass and rot your sense of fortitude and religious honor– I repeat, “we must fight for what we love,” if we truly love it, for all love will suffer from the cruel forces of hell… and what lover can bear to see his beloved so oppressed, attacked, mocked, wronged, and ignored? The one in love does not think of himself; he has no fear of ridicule, nor is he intimidated into hiding or diminishing his loyalty. He humbly yet faithfully rises to the challenge, and the purity of his heart will lead him to victory.

This may seem an overzealous response to such an everyday question, but that is in fact why I risk the appearance of excess. This is an everyday battlefield. This is one of those unassuming crossroads of character that we encounter regularly yet ignorantly, not discerning the ever-present stakes, the constant tug-of-war between God and Self in our lives, between the militant devotion of faith and the insouciance of the lukewarm soul. We must be vigilant, for evil never ceases to hunt us. We must be ever ready and willing to face the world and its liar Prince with swords drawn and hearts afire, saying with our Savior that “It is written and forever remains written, ‘YOU SHALL WORSHIP THE LORD YOUR GOD AND SERVE ONLY HIM.’” (Luke 4:8)

“…For whoever denies and disowns Me for fear of men, I shall also deny before My Father and His angels in Heaven!” (Matthew 10:33; Luke 12:9)

“How can we understand forgiveness if we haven’t recognized the depth of our sin?”
- John Henry Newman

Truly, forgiveness means very little to one who feels he has no need of it– such a one may even feel offended at the implication that they have done something that needs to be forgiven.

Unless we are humbled– even crushed– enough to both see and admit our great sinfulness and need of forgiveness– unless we realize that we absolutely deserve to be crucified for our evil deeds, we will not, and cannot, understand the staggering mercy and love of God through Christ’s saving death in our place.

Our faith is a terribly beautiful paradox in this: that the greatest of all miseries– our contrite cognizance of how we have offended God– leads to the greatest of all joys… hearing our Savior say from the bloody Cross, “I forgive you.”

filmnoirsbian:

I love how quick people are to band together. Strangers waiting in line, strangers in an elevator, strangers at a concert, strangers in a public restroom, strangers in an airport, strangers on a bus…literally all it takes is one shared glance and we develop a sense of comraderie 🫂

Human hearts are made for relationship, and it’s beautiful to see them bloom so swiftly and sincerely. Even if you never meet again in this world, your souls have spoken, and that touch lasts forever.

Human connections, however brief, are golden sweet things. Beloved, make some today, in that very motivation of love. Smile, say hello, wave to a child, even talk about the weather. Just reach out and touch their heart, genuinely, even for a moment. Treasure that person. Glimpse their full life and potential in that heartbeat of time. Love them, and then let them go on too. Life is all about that shared camaraderie, and it will enrich your days like endless flowers. Give a stranger a bouquet today.

koinohnia:

Don’t worry about money or provision just keep God first and seek Him always.

Believe me, He will provide– if not financially, then with grace and spiritual support nevertheless. Eternal life is more important, and God will prioritize that– thanks be to Him– as we also must. So trust His judgment. Seek Him first, seek Him only, and He will take care of the details.

llleighsmith:

i’m so thankful we’re alive to smell flowers and touch saltwater and get chilled in the breeze and take deep breaths and make foods warm with love and dance and laugh and move and wake up and dig our hands in dirt and eat strawberries and draw mindlessly and remember and sing and joke and walk down the same street again and again and make meaning. we are so lucky we get to be and feel and keep going

God has created a truly beautiful world, yet it is only a pale glimpse of the undiluted blissful purity of heaven. May we treasure our short time on this fragile and precious earth, living our equally fragile and precious lives with charity and compassion and mercy for both it and each other, seeking always to preserve and protect and promote beauty in every action, in every moment.

There are flowers and oceans and gentle breezes, dirt and strawberries and sunlit streets, music and memories and much much more. There are people. There is you. Life is so wonderfully rich in loveliness and we must live in constant recognition and gratitude for it, while never losing hope and direction towards what further love awaits our tender souls after death. This is how Christ Himself lived– God Who became human in order to laugh and breathe and eat and cry and pray– who built furniture and broke bread and hugged children and healed lepers and died to take away our sins, so we could live our lives today with a fuller and brighter joy, with a stronger and truer hope, with steadfast faith and ardent love. Christ loved being human, and He loves humans, and He wants us to be fully human, and so we should imitate His heartfelt and holy life. That includes dirt and flowers and strawberries. That includes singing and sleeping and feeling. Do not worry, child. There is more loveliness to be found in His footsteps than you can ever imagine.

How lucky we are to have this life, this time, this world. How blessed we are to have a Savior Who made it all and shares in it with us as our friend… and how joyous we are to have the constant hope and promise of heaven with Him in the end. That is true life– here, and hereafter. God loves you all.

Everything that is, is because of God’s Will. He orchestrates the universe’s heart. Let that touch yours, as you look at the cosmos around you. It’s all God’s choice. You are, too.
 

“God is love, and all his operations proceed from love.”

— St. Lawrence of Brindisi

All means all. Remember this in your darkest days– God is still in control, and everything He orders and allows will and does serve His purposes of Love. It is His nature, His essence; it cannot be otherwise! So fear not. God is Love, forever and always and in all ways.

This prayer has me honestly weeping. It is heart-achingly beautiful.

Dear Saint Mary Madalene, pray for us, your poor sinful siblings, by the grace of the One Who you love so much! Remind our wounded souls that, as He healed you, so shall He heal us, who also seek Him in our sorrows. Help us to always remember the tenderness of His mercy and love, and to never despair, even when we too stand at the tomb. There is always an Easter morning. May God bless us with the grace to meet you, and Him, there.

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Steel pilgrimage amulet/souvenir depicting Mary Magdalene, Mary of Egypt, and the Virgin Mary found in the River Thames in London, England, c. 1400-1700. [2832x3969]

My three Marys!! Oh wow. Found in a river, too… almost lost, but never forgotten by God. That’s the hope that Mary Magdalene & Mary of Egypt both exemplify for me– no matter how deep and turbulent and persistent a sin may be, its rough and choking waters will be forever stilled by Christ, Who calms every storm, Whose Heart is the purest ocean of Mercy. And Mary Our Mother, Star of the Sea, leads us to Him out of our muddy mires, never abandoning her children, but guiding them with tender care.

That all just pierces my heart with such aching tender love. I am so glad this was recovered and shared with the faithful.

Saint Mary Magdalene, Saint Mary of Egypt, Our Blessed Mother Mary– pray for us poor sinners still drowning here, and seeking the shores of heaven! Continue to intercede for us until the day we stand safely alongside you in heaven, in the warmth of Our Savior’s Love!

ashstfu:

people are so lovely‼️ they do these ordinary and mundane things like someone is walking hand in hand with their lover and someone is helping a blind old lady cross the road and someone is dancing in the rain with their best friend and someone is helping a little girl find her mother on a crowded playground and someone’s cat is lying next to them on the couch snoring loudly and it’s adorable and someone is dancing to music alone in their room and someone just went into a bakery and is deeply inhaling the sweet smell of freshly baked bread and a little kid is waiting for his grandpa to pick him up and someone is making dinner for their family while singing their favorite song and someone just confessed their love to someone and someone is talking about something they love with a sparkle in their eyes and you’re reading this and you are alive and you are loved, everything will be fine, you’ll be okay and you’ll be happy

There is such sweet tenderness to just being human.

Treasure people. Really see them, and be grateful for them, and love them. That's what the heart of life sings about. God created us to love-- to love Him and to love the planet and to love people-- and really, that's the most beautiful truth. We're all included. We're all wrapped up in that beloved cosmic embrace, forever. In the end, there's only love. Take comfort in that. It will carry you, so you can carry others too-- gently, joyfully.

We will all be okay, held so closely to each others hearts.

Be human. Be loving.

Since my earliest days, I have been blessed with a vivid and thriving imagination. Before even starting school I began to write stories, creating entire worlds to play with, even composing little songs to accompany the characters and concepts I loved to watch playing out in my mind. As the years went on, these stories became more complex, maturing from simple child's tales into the heart-deep thoughts of a teenager, and later into rich and brilliant gems polished by adult experience and lit by undying youthful wonder. The League continues to grow, forever blooming anew, and I firmly believe God put me on this earth to share these bouquets of creative beauty for His sake. Developing a League website will be my first formal effort towards that end. It is my sincere hope that the many LeagueWorlds debuting there will touch the hearts of every visitor with the same genuine joy that has illuminated mine in building them, and the sincere gratitude and loving wonder for the Creator of All Who made every heart that ever was.

​

Soli Deo gloria!

THE LEAGUE'S SECRET HEART

THE SONG OF THE SUFFERING SAVIOR

Before we expound the literal history of the League, we must first reveal and recognize its inmost soul. Yes, its infancy had a body built of colors and songs and imaginary critters, but deep in its heart, springing from my own heart, was a Source and Summit that invariably soaked into every aspect of each World I dreamed up, however small, however seemingly insignificant.

​

I was a very premature child, and even in my youth, I took pride in the fact that I had been baptized in the incubator, for fear that I would not survive the three months needed to stabilize, let alone the next three days. With that, I was a Roman Catholic from the first few hours of my fragile life, and that was something I later lived by to the best of my nascent ability. My grandmother is also deserving of the greatest thanks towards this end; she gave me a Bible which I read ravenously, taught me all my prayers, said a Rosary with me every night, and made sure I went to Mass every week with as much reverence as I could muster at that age. She also gave me my first prayer cards, my absolute favorite of which depicted Christ covered in deep raw wounds, a figure so shockingly deformed yet humble that I would easily lose track of time just staring at it. Something in that image spoke loudly to my own heart, and that stuck with me in an unexpected way, imprinting indelibly on my imagination. It made me a morbid child, and perhaps worried my teachers, that a kindergartener was drawing unicorns and dragons and bats with wounds over their own bleeding hearts, but that was already something I loved too strangely and strongly for it to not express itself in my ideas and art.

​

My Catholic faith thus continued to exercise a massive impact on the aesthetics and vibes of the budding League, in terms of it ultimately reflecting the same aspects I loved most in my religion. I had then, and still have, a powerful devotion to the Sacred & Immaculate Hearts, the Shoulder & Side Wounds of Christ, His Most Precious Blood, The Scourging, and the Crown of Thorns. I thought about Purgatory a lot, about angels, about Our Sorrowful Mother, and about saints with stigmata. In essence, the inherently Catholic concepts of sacred woundedness, love through suffering, life through death, and strength through vulnerability, became the fundamental cornerstone of the League at its very core. To this day, any Leagueworld lacking these qualities will quickly corrode and die. The reflection of and glory of God, especially in the very touchingly human life of Jesus Christ-- God with a body that breathed and bled like ours-- is the first and final goal of the League, both in its creation and in its communication, however uniquely that honor may be achieved in each.

​

THE LEAGUE BEGINS

THE SEEDS BEGIN TO BLOOM

My great-aunt, a Franciscan nun, gave me a gift at age three that I adored and still do: a giant plush unicorn with golden eyes and a backwards horn. I named her Unisalia, proclaimed her a queen, and went everywhere with her. She became my first imaginary friend, and many years later, would hold a position of utmost honor within the League... but I digress. In her sudden blessed bestowal, I can now see that already, before I even began dreaming up worlds of any solid sort, the Hand of God was planting the seeds.

​

My second imaginary friend appeared around 1996, and she was, quite frankly, utterly bizarre, but I loved her. She was the result of my obsession with a shoot-em-up game at the local truckstop that my dad introduced me to: one in which you had to kill invading aliens in order to secure a spaceship. Of course, my interest was not in the killing, but in the presence of death in its rawest, most blatant state-- wounds and blood and terrible openness. After some time I became unable to play the game because I kept daydreaming about aliens with softer hearts who weren't coldly spattered on impact, but who instead survived in a wounded vulnerable state and forced the offending soldiers to rethink their actions and open their own hearts to compassion as well. So with this dreaming, something common to my young mind, I ended up with an invisible friend who was a rainbow-skinned Xenomorph princess. She shone like glitter on glass and her name was Jewel and her mission was to evangelize everyone who dared to assume that an alien couldn't be Catholic. In my daydreams, she and her ever-growing gang of technicolor pals-- all named after gemstones-- would endure countless conflicts with humans who adamantly saw aliens as evil and deserving of death, whereas these were seeking only peace and compassion, repentance and forgiveness, determined to help humanity soften its global heart to not only extraterrestrials like them but also to its own people, who were treated as aliens by their fellow man. Oh, and every Xenomorph in my head carried a matching color rosary. It was pretty awesome.

​

My great-aunt passed away when I was six. It was a few days after my birthday. I remember standing in front of the washing machine in the middle of the night, my mom and dad obviously upset but trying to break it to me gently. She had been sick for a while, and being the religious child I was, I already knew she was approaching death, and I dreaded it. So judging by their behavior, I knew. I burst into tears and shouted at them both-- "you don't have to tell me, I already know she died!"-- and ran into my room to dissolve into wracking sobs. I knew what death was. I knew what the afterlife was. It didn't make the loss hurt any less. It didn't make me miss her any less.

I can still remember her funeral, the feeling of her cold cheek as I kissed it in the coffin, the smell of her habit, of her powdered skin, of the flowers. I hugged Unisalia tight when I got home, dizzy from my first funeral, and that dear unicorn became secretly associated now with not only the nun who brought her to me, but also with her death-- with that very mantra of memento mori. Remember that you will die too, but remember also, that it is not the end. Remember that, while you live this life, gifted to you from God, you have a responsibility to that Giver. And that responsibility is to prepare for this life's ever-nearing death, for that final door out of this world, for what-- and Who-- lies beyond. So live your life with your heart set on higher things... because those are the only things that last... the only things that are truly real.

One day, both Unisalia and I would also face death. But until then, we had a mission...

THE EARLY DAYS

THE BIRTH OF A UNIVERSE

In its earliest days, the League began just like any other world-- a vast and shifting sphere of pure potential, wonderful yet unstable. I wrote a great deal of short stories and imagined a great many creatures, but none of these projects belonged to anything greater and grander than themselves.

The first hint of a deeper thread was glimpsed around 1995 with one of my first "imaginary friends," a singing king cobra that I simply called "My Cobra." As this was the 1990s, he was the frontman in a 5-man band, the other members being a frilled lizard, a bat, a unicorn, and a dolphin... my favorite animals at the time. A childish concept, perhaps, but they were the first individuals to carry their own faces and names across many mindscapes, creating a history and reputation for themselves, and building their own unique personalities. Furthermore, this basic idea of a character group with a musical heart became a sort of greater heart to the nascent League, as my personal gift of musical composition invariably went hand-in-hand with my other creative pursuits. 

In 1996, the first hint of a solid "world" coalesced with a new character: Zimbo the Alien. He was an amusing fellow, described as popular and intelligent yet still proving to be hopelessly baffled by earth culture and technology. I spent many hours drawing him and his four color-coded friends flying about in saucer-bubble ships, protecting the earth from hostile invaders, and searching for new planets to explore. These two new concepts-- a character color spectrum and the notion of good versus evil-- were truly the two deepest seeds of the League to come, as they would blossom again and again over the years in its Worlds. 

crownedbythelord:

Reading the Bible was always meant to lead you into a conversation with God. Never just read it and leave, it will not change you. Prayer changes us, because God changes us. We need to talk to Him in order to have intimacy with Him, not just reading about Him.

I always emphasize that our religion is a relationship.

Here’s a key observation I’ve had lately, being on this website: Fandom is flourishing in our culture. Whether it’s focused on video games, books, television, musicians, celebrities, sports… ultimately, people invest their time, talent, and treasure in supporting and praising their personal fandoms to an honestly shocking extent. People will write fanfics that are thousands of pages long. People will spend entire paychecks buying merchandise of their favorite characters, or media with their favorite celebrity. People will weep and rage and laugh and love so strongly and sincerely from how these fandoms have affected their lives– maybe their life has even been ‘saved’ by one, having given them a reason to keep going, a joy to cling to, a dream to pursue.

Why are we not so wholeheartedly invested in our religion?

Because we read the Bible like a textbook, not as the story of someone we love. We miss the entire point.

Harry Potter gets more love than Jesus on this website because people feel like they know Harry, and why? Because they read those books and learn who he is as a person, however fictional; they learn about his life, about his hopes and fears, his friends and enemies, his history and culture and world. People begin to read those books with the mindset of starting an adventure. They expect to be swept up in a grand story, full of wonder and terror and possibility, and they are hooked– invested in it for life– because their heart has been touched with compassion, with care, with camaraderie.

Is that how we view our Bibles?

It may be argued that the Bible is not written like a novel, and its often dry language is harder to soak ourselves in. But it’s a poor objection. There are many poorly written books and movies and games that people fawn over, many celebrities that offer sparse personal details and have equally paltry screen time, but none of this hampers the love of their fans. So why this great discrepancy between fandom and faith?

I argue that it is because we faithful typically and tragically forget to utilize a great gift of God’s, one that can make or break our relationship with Scripture… we don’t use our imagination.

THAT is WHY fandoms thrive. You love the concept but it’s written badly? Imagine. There are holes in the plot? Imagine. Mysterious celebrity? Imagine. No updates for years? Imagine. Your favorite character is abandoned by canon? Imagine. THAT is why we have libraries worth of fanfics, museums worth of fanart, countless contributions of creativity and support and wonder– because of imagination blooming wildly in that fertile soil.

But you don’t bother to imagine anything unless your heart is in it, first. And once it is, you can’t help but imagine– because imagination is how our soul steps into another’s story, into another life, and forms a relationship with it– and you can’t have a true relationship without love.

So if we love Jesus, why are we not imagining ourselves there with Him? Why are we not seeking that relationship? Why are we not dreaming about walking the dusty roads of Galilee with Him, about sailing and fishing with Him and the Apostles, about standing and weeping beneath His Cross, about running to the empty tomb on Easter morning? Are you afraid of how much you will feel from it, once it becomes so personal, so real? Are you afraid of how powerful a force the Bible will become in your life once your life is part of it?

Are you afraid of experiencing such actual, everyday iintimacy with God?

Maybe your imagination is rusty, though. Maybe you’ve never really learned how to use it. That’s okay, in this case, as long as you still have the desire to think about Jesus, and ponder His life in your own way, after reading His story, His Word. That still counts. That’s still building a good foundation for your relationship with Him. But as for building an active, living relationship with our Lord– one not based on mere wondering– we Christians have something utterly profound that no fandom has or can have– prayer. We can TALK TO JESUS. He HEARS us, because He LIVES, and He LOVES us. He isn’t just a character in the Bible! He is our friend, our brother– our Savior and our God!! He is literally the Creator of everything we love and cherish, and He became a mere human like us so He could share it all with us firsthand, so we would never be alone in our joys or sorrows. God became man so we could know Him directly– to see, hear, and touch Him, to be with Him intimately and personally and truly. In this, Jesus is closer to us than any character, even than any celebrity. There is, in Christ, no distance between us and God. He isn’t separate from us by a screen or a page or a crowd of paparazzi. He is as close to us as our own heart– closer, even.

Consider the Mass. Do you realize, now, why that’s so momentous? Through the Mass, every single Mass, we ARE present, outside of linear time and space, at BOTH the Cross of the past AND the heavenly Kingdom of the future– both absolutely THERE in our immediate present. And because of this transcendent unity, CHRIST IS THERE, LITERALLY. He is working through the Priest, He is speaking through the Scriptures, He is present IN US as His mystical Body AND He IS IN THE EUCHARIST. He literally feeds us with His Heart, with Life and Love entire, so we can live in Him and He can live in us. We don’t have to imagine it. He is THERE. If you loved Him in the Good Book, and you yearned to meet Him through your dreams, then this fact should turn your world upside down with unbearable joy. You should run to church, just to be with Him. If you would wait in line for hours or days for your favorite movie or game or book, because you love it, how much more should a PERSONAL relationship with God Himself move you to do anything to be there with Him? Do you realize how much He wants to see you, too?

Go to Adoration, even just for ten minutes. Just be with Christ. Be with the God who loves you ardently enough TO be there, simply yet totally, just because He loves you. Think of it this way… God literally just wants to sit next to you in the church and embrace you. He doesn’t need you to entertain Him, or look all fancy, or be “worthy.” He just loves you and wants to love you… and like any lover, He yearns for you to love Him, too. And so even if you just pop into a church for five minutes on the way to work, and sit before the Tabernacle with a burning heart, knowing He is there and has been waiting lovingly for you– that will console Him, and delight Him, and give Him joy. YOU can warm the Heart of Jesus with YOUR love, too. When you really realize that, it will change you. It will illuminate your entire life with the desire to love and be loved by Him– and the most beautiful thing is that you can love… and you ARE loved, forever.

We don’t need fanfics when it comes to our faith. The story isn’t separate from us. The life of Christ isn’t over, and never will be. We’re LIVING IT, WITH HIM, RIGHT NOW. And that is the most amazing thing I can imagine.

    "Because many Christians are more eager to acquire much learning than to live in God’s purpose for their life they often go astray, and bear little or no fruit."
-Albert Finch

   
"Isn’t it incredible how man, blinded by his self-efforts, can turn something so beautiful, like spending quality time with Jesus, into a work?"
-Albert Finch

spacekrakens:

It would have been my brother’s birthday today, and my mom having a really difficult time with grief tonight, please pray for peace for her

Praying for all of you. 🙏

A small but real comfort: his soul is alive and he still loves you, too. Remember and rejoice that you have memories with him, even while you grieve– for grief is born from love inexpressible– and hold to your hearts thr blessed hope that you shall meet again in the end. God loves you all, and holds your lives and afterlives safely in His hands.

Eternal rest grant unto her brother’s soul, O Lord, and may perpetual light shine upon him. May his soul, and the souls of all the faithful departed, rest in peace. Amen.

jurakan: The media be like, “The Catholic Church is so hypocritical for expecting Joe Biden to follow the beliefs he professes to believe in every Sunday!” Look, I don’t know how to put this more plainly: a man who will not keep his promises to God will not keep his oaths to us.

angeltreasure: He needs to change his ways and go to Confession. He says it’s a private matter but it’s not! Not when my country loves to ‘“police the world”’ so naturally this whole thing is going to blow up as other countries watch us and laugh. We need to pray for him.
 

We absolutely need to pray for him.

Furthermore, it’s never a private matter when scandal against the Body of Christ in His Church. Catholicism is a community of faith, a community of saints born from contrite sinners. If Biden fails to recognize that his actions and inactions are globally reflecting on the Church he has been baptized into, then he fails to recognize that Christ-relationship aspect of it– and that is fatal.

As members of Christ’s Body on earth, it is our holy responsibility to keep each other accountable to God. We are all on equal footing before Him. Politician or peasant, we are all subject to Divine Justice… and Divine Mercy. Pray for our president.

Treasure the lives of all those you know, even in passing. Love them, care for them, listen to them, help them. Tomorrow, they may be gone. What will you miss about them? Yes, you will miss them, even your most distant acquaintance– it is inevitable, for all human hearts are connected, and the loss of any and every one is felt. Think upon this. Do you appreciate the presence of their lives in theirs? Do you care for them? Do you love them? Because there is so much to love, in every one of them.

Kiss your children. Hug your parents. Visit your grandparents. Call a friend. Write to an old pal. Chat with the people at work. Strike up a conversation with a stranger. Love people. Life is so short, so precious. Treat every soul you know like a precious jewel, which you rejoice to look at, for every glance shows some new beauty before unnoticed. One day they will be gone, taken back to God, and all you will have on earth are your memories of them– hopefully, with them, too. Go, make some blessed memories, for yourself and others, today.

This is a story of kindness perpetuated, but it concludes with a tremulous hope. Consider this! Are you anyone’s repeat customer? Do you care about the workers at the places where you shop and eat? Do you know any of their names? Do you want to know their stories, their hopes and dreams? If you knew they were struggling to make ends meet, would you be a little extra kind, compassionate, generous? Do you thank them for their indispensable role in allowing you to have the conveniences you rely on? They are people, beloved people, and they continue to exist once they are off the time clock. They are your neighbors; they could be your friends. Do you love them as such?

Take time today, this week, to be lovingly brave and act on this, if you haven’t ever before. Say hello, smile, say thank you, maybe even make some small talk. Yes, it is an investment, yes it is a commitment to a relationship, however small. But you will bring a little more love, a little more hope, a little more joy into someone’s life, someone who may feel utterly ignored, unappreciated, and unimportant. Have compassion on your neighbor.

And remember– heaven is all about relationship. It is a community of saints, a collective unity of holy love and friendship. If you forsake human connections now, how do you expect to handle heaven? Christ commanded us to love each other, friend and foe alike. This story is a simple yet true illustration of what that looks like.

Every tiny act of kindness and compassion makes a difference. Every single one. You may never see the full effects of it– you may not see any effects at all– but God does. God is Love and He will unfailingly deliver and perpetuate all love. So give a little love, no matter how little; it’s still love, and like the widow’s penny, it carries a precious worth inestimable.
 

"Here now is the shortest and easiest way to salvation: Be obedient and sober, do not find fault, and keep mind and heart from evil thoughts. Think that all men are good and beloved of the Lord. For such humility the grace of the Holy Spirit will dwell in you, and cause you to exclaim, “How merciful is the Lord!""
-St. Silouan the Athonite

This is the very mindset of Heaven, in which the mercy and tenderness of God permeates all our thoughts and actions. It is so beautifully simple, for all it requires is Love!

"The Holy Spirit teaches us to love our enemies, so that the soul pities them as if they were her own children. There are people who desire the destruction, the torment in hell-fire of their enemies, or the enemies of the Church. They think like this because they have not learned divine love from the Holy Spirit, for he who has learned the love of God will shed tears for the whole world.
You say that So-and-so is an evil-doer and may he burn in hell fire. But I ask you — supposing God were to give you a fair place in paradise, and you saw burning in the fire the man on whom you had wished the tortures of hell, even then would you really not feel pity for him, whoever he might be, an enemy of the Church even? Or is it that you have a heart of steel? But there is no place for steel in paradise. Paradise has need of humility and the love of Christ, which pities all men. The grace of God is not in the man who does not love his enemies."
~St Silouan the Athonite

Love your “enemies” as if they were your own children. Be just so merciful, tender, and longsuffering with them, as a mother is towards a lost child! Are not all souls, in fact, God’s children, even if they refuse to recognize it? Their Creator is still Our God, Who loves them most sincerely with a Heart that aches for their safe return home. How could we, knowing this, not share in that same compassion for all?

There is no place for steel in Paradise. If your heart is not willing to melt for others, regardless of their offenses towards you, then you do not yet understand how God loves… you do not yet understand the power of the Cross.

"God is long-suffering and merciful to you: this you experience many times every day. Be long-suffering and merciful to your brethren, also fulfilling the words of the Apostle, who thus speaks of love before everything: “Love suffereth long, and is kind.” You desire that the Lord should rejoice you by His love, rejoice on your part the hearts of others by your tender love and kindness."
- St. John of Kronstadt

This is such beautiful way to phrase that golden rule– may your tender love and kindness cause the hearts of all you meet to rejoice, just as your heart rejoices in God’s merciful love towards you.

"Lead those I entrust to you in the ways of simple love, love dedicated to my divine tenderness. If people had more trust in me and treated me with respectful but profound affection, how much more would they feel helped and at the same time loved. I am in the innermost being of each one of them, but how little they care for me or for my presence, my desires, and my contributions. I am he who gives and who wishes to give always more, but it is necessary that I be desired and relied on."
-Fr. Gaston Courtois

To be helped, we must admit we need help, we must want to be helped, we must be grateful for the help, and we must love the one who helps us. All of this springs from humility, simplicity of heart, and purity of desire.

Think of how much Jesus helps you, always! Reflect on what He has done to save and deliver you in the past, what He does to correct and guide you on the present, and what hope and joy He continues to give you for the future. He never stops giving, because He loves you tenderly, and knows you need His help. Are we so proud that we resist this love? Are we grateful, like an affectionate child, or do we resent needing help? Take time to sincerely thank Jesus for His unfailing help today, to align our desires and priorities with His, and to reverently love Him in every moment– for He is there, within us always, our dearest friend and ever-present salvation in trouble.

"Imagine yourself seriously indisposed, and that I, who love you tenderly, call to see you. After saying a few words of sympathy and consolation, I should certainly look at you with compassion and, through love of you, make your sufferings my own. Thus when we meditate on the Passion of Christ, seeing Him in such affliction, we ought to compassionate Him, and then to remain looking upon Him in so great torments, and, through compassionate love, make His sufferings our own."
-St. Paul of the Cross

True compassion is to suffer with. This intimacy can only truly occur in silence. Yes, kind and gentle words are not without merit, but true consolation is of the heart, not the mouth. When we are able to simply be with Christ in His Most Sorrowful Passion, not seeking anything for ourselves through speech or actions– and especially not seeking a conclusion to the encounter– but desiring only to join Him in His pain, indefinitely even, for the sake of pure love… this is compassion, and this is how Christ loves us.

"When we receive the Eucharist, we become living tabernacles. God has entered our hearts!"

"The correct definition of a good Catholic is a Catholic who takes the salvation of his soul seriously."
- Ven. Bishop Fulton J. Sheen

"Be increasingly available; be confident. I have brought you along decidedly difficult roads but I have never abandoned you, and I am at your service in my own way for achieving the grand and beautiful design of love that we have fashioned from all eternity. I told you that you would suffer a lot—but that I would be near you, within you—and that, sustained by my grace, you would never suffer beyond your strength."
-Jesus, to Fr. Gaston Courtois

There is a deep truth here, a shockingly joyous truth– that, when we suffer for Christ, He is near us; He is within us! If we remember this, we will embrace all our sufferings as graces from God, for they are all blessed opportunities of love.

    “The passions are uprooted and turned to flight by constant occupation of the mind with God. This is a sword that puts them to death. Whoever always thinks about God drives the demons away from himself.”
    - Saint Isaac of Nineveh, Eighth Ascetical Homily

“In Advent… we relearn the lessons of the first covenant: that we cannot make God, however we long for him; that we must be surprised, ambushed and carried off by God.”

— Rowan Williams, A Ray of Darkness

Oh goodness I love this. God is the One Who must make the first move, as it were; He loved us first, after all.

That’s the strange and sweet thought of Advent– oh we do long for Him now, yes, but even when we were totally lost in sin, absolutely imprisoned, we were dearly loved by Him, and He longed to free us… but, we were helpless, powerless, confused, and despairing. We had nothing but the bleariest hope that ‘there has to be something more.’ So our merciful God did, and does, this: He bursts into our dark lives, breaks the fetters, and carries us off like a bride. That’s grace! It hits you like a whirlwind of roses, beautiful and terrible and completely unexpected. The devil is confounded, we are astounded, and no one can stop it. If your heart is at all open to it, if you have only the tiniest crack to let the light in, believe me, God will pour grace in by the tankful. Yes, it is only when He comes and gives us that grace of love that we can return it– without Him, we are useless, impotent, empty– but what lover would ever leave their beloved so alone? God jumps at the chance to lavish love upon us. Give Him the tiniest glance and He will sing about it. Grace is divine generosity and we cannot fathom that magnitude of unconditional compassion… but when it hits, it’s an ambush for sure. We cannot make God do it; that would not be love! Anything freely given cannot be forced. So we must wait, and hope, and trust, and this is Advent’s very heart– listening for love at the door.

“[H]oliness is not the denial but the acceptance of being creatures.”

— Rowan Williams, Creation, Creativity, Creatureliness: the Wisdom of Finite Existence

We cannot be holy if we are proud. The humility that accompanies this total submission to God’s sovereignty is the only door through which His grace can enter and change us, to make us holy. We cannot do that ourselves. We are only clay– He is the Potter.

When we accept and freely admit our status as feeble creatures, then we also admit that we have been Created, and therefore Our Creator can and will do whatever He wills with us… thanks be to Him, that very will is to make us holy.

“The Advent tension is a way of learning again that God is God: that between even our deepest and holiest longing and the reality of God is a gap which only grace can cross; otherwise we are alone again, incommunicado, our signals and symbols bounced back to us off the glassy walls of the universe.”

-Rowan Williams, A Ray of Darkness

“...In spite of appearances, God and the world belong together. There is no place where the love of God can’t go. And that is unbearably hard to believe.”

— Rowan Williams, Archbishop of Canterbury, in “A Ray of Darkness” (via intrinsicallydisordered)

Paradoxically, it is only hard to believe if we forget that our God is a suffering God, a loving Father Who meets His children directly in their distress. In the most decrepit, war-torn, diseased, corrupted, ignorant, sin-wracked parts of the world and the human heart, God is there, poignantly there, because He needs to be there– He wants to be there. God’s Presence in those places is, quite literally, What allows them to persist. Suffering might also persist, but when God is acknowledged there nevertheless, it becomes a seed-ground for the most powerful mercy, charity, and justice to be proven.

God created this world. That is a fact, one that cannot be revoked, no matter how damage this world has been subjected to since. This world belongs to Him, as do we, and we are forever beloved to Him. We belong together. He is, inevitably, always with us. And that is the deepest comfort.

Saint Francis in Meditation, 1606, Caravaggio

There is so much intimacy in this. The simplicity and silence of the scene is touching, a glimpse into a private prayer, and the tiny details say so much. Everything is a quiet brown, warmed by candlelight, humble and guileless… I love that his Bible is propped open on a skull, and the beloved Crucifix is balanced between those worn pages, a little lopsided… and Saint Francis’s expression, brow furrowed with emotion, head resting on folded hands in deep thought. It’s such a natural pose but it’s not at all casual; I can feel the prayer in it, the absolute attentiveness of his soul.

God bless Caravaggio, this is gorgeous.

“But realize, every “you shall not” in the Bible is a promise of God’s protection. He is not preventing you from enjoying life; rather, He is saving you—keeping you from destroying yourself. Every command in His Word is an expression of divine love to you, His beloved child… . Adam and Eve didn’t understand this and the world is still paying for it. Don’t you make the same mistake.”

— Charles Stanley

Honestly, if God said “you shall not eat fly agaric mushrooms” or “you shall not put your fingers in an electric outlet” would you still disobey “just in case He’s hiding something from you?” Pride is going to kill us. When are we going to just trust God? Don’t we understand the nature of correction? If someone is blindly walking off a cliff, wouldn’t you shove them out of the way to solid ground? God is protecting us from our feeble human ignorance and stupidity– and I say this with humility and affection, for I personally am very stupid and ignorant, and if God didn’t love me so much I’d have tripped headlong over the Grim Reaper’s toes years ago. God loves us. God knows we don’t know the right thing to do on our own– no child does! We can’t reason out morality because our ego gets in the way. We are lost and we need help and if we would just trust our loving Father and admit our frightened weakness He would sweep us up to safety in His arms in a heartbeat.

Honestly this simple sad truth always makes me tear up so bad. Every command of God is just a different translation of “I love you.” Why don’t we believe that? Why don’t we listen to Him? Why do we think we’re missing out and run away, when our Father is really just saving the most beautiful stuff for later, when we are grown up enough to truly appreciate it? There’s nothing outside but snakes and thorns. God’s enemies want to kill you. God wants you safe. He has warned us. But somehow, we get duped. A devil offers us a fruit and the taste makes us forget it’s poison. God rescues us, chides us, and we associate our guilty pain with His discipline instead and blame Him rather than the devil at fault. Why do we keep making that same mistake? Why do we harden our hearts and pretend nothing is wrong when we sin? Why do we reject the gentle yoke? Do we not understand love?

See, that doesn’t even count as “drag” anymore– unless you’re referring to the “old serpent,” pun gravely intended. That man is outright dressing up as a demon. No one is thinking that he is a woman– that’s obviously not his intent. He’s actively mangling femininity into a disturbing caricature, turning woman into goddess into devil. Satan is mocking Eve to this day, through people like this. Satan is turning femininity into a hideous parody and we ignorant sinners are praising it. But hey, pride is the devil’s trademark. It rots everything it touches. There is nothing beautiful or feminine in that crazed costume whatsoever. It’s an atrocity. I genuinely fear for the poor children who are being forcibly fed sugar-coated propaganda from a literal nightmare.

Seriously, pray for these people. This is spiritual warfare and they are glamour-blinded prisoners, doomed to die if they are not rescued. Their souls are very sick. Pray to The Woman who crushed the serpent– Our Lady, the Virgin Mary– to heal femininity in our world, to restore the truth and beauty God intended to every woman, and to heal the hearts of all men who do such scandalous things as this!

insertcringename: A gay man, talking to a class of children: “Hi, I have a boyfriend. I like to hold hands with him, kiss and maybe one day we’d like to get married, just like your parents are. This is not something to be afraid of, and I hope you all grow up to be respectful people who doesn’t hate and attack people for being different.” Some of you: “oMg whY is tHiS PErsoN tAlKINg aBOut diRTy seX WiTh mY kiDS???!!??!!”
 

Gay people aren’t inherently more sexual than straight people, no. That isn’t the statement being made. The point is that the LGBTQ+ community has and does actively associate with deviant sexual behavior, sexual promiscuity, and mental illness. Just look at this website. This is not a criticism of individuals– this is a well-deserved condemnation of the evils of the LGBTQ+ movement.

I, personally, hold zero hatred for gay/trans folks, and actively denounce all violence and discrimination against them as people. The gay man in genuine love who just wants to spend his life with his partner is no threat to our children. The movement associated with his sexual preference is– notably in the surreptitious morally-relative adjustments they persistently attempt to make in the psyches of children.

As a Catholic, I staunchly believe in sexuality as being sacred, and only valid when chastely expressed within the sacrament of marriage, between a biological man and woman, for the sake of childbearing via conjugal love. Marriage and family are deeply important to my faith and I will defend them to the utmost.

This is where the hidden danger comes in. A gay man in love does not intend to undermine the sacred teaching of the church on this subject, but his innocent misunderstanding of what marriage is will nevertheless achieve the same end. This also goes for LGBTQ+ views on sex in general: in practice, in purpose, and in one’s biological relation to it. The more our societal views on sex are subtly twisted to a hypercasual, entertainment-based, self-serving model as opposed to one anchored in formal reverence and self-sacrifice for the sake of a family, the more our society as a whole will morally deteriorate until we are left confused and hollow at the expense of compromising our integrity.

Difference isn’t the issue. The matter in which the LGBTQ+ mindset differs is. And while I will always respect human persons, regardless of sexual orientation, I will not and cannot respect the beast of “pride” that attempts to use such folks as puppets for its own self-gratification. That’s what is corrupting our children through the media. But unless people stand up against it in these sneaking atrocities, it will swallow up the identities of SSA individuals everywhere in its glut of rainbow-stained hedonism.

That’s why they think you’re talking about “dirty sex” whenever you mention homosexuality. They recognize the ravenous wolf when they see even a friendly pup, so to speak. They don’t know that there is a difference between the two– between the movement and the man. Those who fear it, will fear you. Those who hate it, will hate you. That is wrong, yes, but they don’t understand. Not yet. Until people in general are able to differentiate between the fact of someone helplessly experiencing same-sex attraction and the optional but fatal choice to identify with the now-toxic subculture based on making that inclination into a proudly sexual obsession, they will assume that they are the same.

That thing is the enemy. Not you.

“Religion isn’t just a cute necklace you vibe with.” Amen. Religion is a matter of life and death, of morals and priorities and values, of how you treat humankind and creation and time and responsibility. Religion must inundate everything in your existence, and if it doesn’t, you’re treating it like a toy instead of the solemn way of life that it is. And this, this ridiculous marketing of religion for fashion and kitschy “inspiration” is outrageously crass.

The general neopagan idea seems, to me, to be that “women are goddesses” in general; there is a frustrating and shocking inability to see women as both subservient and yet heroic. The very idea that a women could be successful, strong, inspiring, etc. and yet still be submissive, meek, and feminine, is alien to them. Hence the disturbing pseudo-worship we are now frequently seeing for such figures as RGB and Kamala Harris, and the childish abuse of such words as “fierce,” “fearless,” “independent,” “wild & free,” etc. as if female virtue was based on the traits of an attack animal. There’s also the pervasive worship of intelligence, seen in the growing hypertrust in science and disdain for simplicity, as well as the hidden fear of having to ask someone else for help. Can’t do that and be a “goddess,” now can you?

To this company, and many people in our modern society, “a strong woman cannot be submissive to a masculine God” and therefore, she is now hailed as the god(dess) instead– but in a solitary role of power, rejecting all masculine divinity as “unnecessary” or even a hindrance. This modern goddess worship is a frightening, antichrist, misandric erasure of God Himself. “Who is your inner goddess” is a garbage phrase that seeks to foment this satanic ego-worship. It’s blatant self-idolatry, not just heresy. “Non serviam,” in essence. Yet ironically, like Satan himself, they are still ignorantly imitating the very God they rebelled against– the women are trying to claim masculinity as their own, and the devil is trying to recreate everything in his own image. In trying to usurp God, they only prove His necessity to existence, and His sovereignty over it. They want His job, but humans are worse than devils in that they refuse to admit He has it– let alone that He even exists.

Worst of all, this labeling of not only female saints but The Blessed Virgin herself as “goddesses” specifically attacks the Christian God by denying the fact that His Power is made manifest in their love and humble obedience to Him. Again, rejecting the virtue of submissiveness to God. But this flat-out undermines the Incarnation, by not only refusing to grant any power to God as Father, but by also so idolizing the female that she is seen as not needing a Savior– especially not a male one. Heck, I’d say that Jesus’s profound humility and submissiveness are also seen as ironic threats to this goddess mindset, because deep down they cannot deny that there true power lies, and real Truth, and it starkly reveals the hollow pride of their stolen thrones. Mary is Queen of Heaven because of her Son and because she was unflinchingly submissive and faithful to God despite all agony and hardship. She had no power, influence, or accolades on earth! That’s not what her Queenship is about! She is forever Our Mother, Our Mediatrix, who incessantly prays for us and helps us in our needs. She seeks no glory; she seeks no reward other than God Himself. THAT is true feminine power– “Behold, I am the handmaid of the LORD; may it be done to me according to thy word.” We don’t worship Mary, and she would reject the very attempt. Seeing her idolized here is so ignorant and offensive, it’s actually disgusting.

This genuinely angers me so much, but that means I need to pray hardcore for these folks and plead Luke 23:34. We need to admonish, instruct, and forgive these terribly lost and confused souls. God can convert even them, as He converted even us.

“Be satisfied with the living conditions you now have. And do not be prompt to show your learning or skill. Hold back your remarks, No, it isn’t so-and-so, but so-and-so. Contradict nobody and do not get into arguments; let the other person always be right. Never set your own will above that of your neighbour. This teaches you the difficult art of submission, and along with it, humility. Humility is indispensable.”

— Way of the Ascetics 

This is terrifically counter-cultural. To not demand any privilege, to forsake luxury, to reject entitlement, to avoid publicity and recognition and acclaim… it’s the exact opposite of what we see in the media, in politics, and sadly even in our own homes. To place the good of others always above your own requires much grace; this virtue is not of man, unachievable by human effort alone. Man can mimic virtue, true, but pride will render those same actions worthless and repugnant before God. Pride can keep its mouth shut if it means people will praise it as a result, but it is still seeking to “win,” to be greater than others. Pride sees others not as people, but as opponents, as rivals, as servants, as adorers, even as fools. Pride cannot honor others. Pride cannot serve others. Pride cannot forgive others, or show mercy, or sacrifice. Only humility is capable of that, for humility is the crown of Christ, Who Is Love.

Yes, a simple holy gratitude fosters humility, when we remember that all we have is God’s gift, and we deserve nothing in and of ourselves. This applies to possessions as well as talents. But holding one’s tongue in check, refraining from commentary, remarks, arguments, willfulness, and attention, requires a deeper sense of one’s littleness and unworthiness before God– a sense that, without the grace of charity, will be manipulated by the devil into further twisted pride through self-loathing. No, only love can inspire virtuous behavior. Love for God is what moves us to obey Him– to submit to Him with quiet, trusting joy, knowing He does Good for us at all times. And this same love of God, overflowing to our fellow man, will make our tongue naturally gentle and kind, with no effort but transformative grace. The meek heart sees all men as fellow children of God, as beloved siblings by the Father’s Love, and such a soul cannot help but love them in return– a true and tender love, seeking always to do them good, always to show them gentle mercy.

Have faith in God’s Fidelity & Goodness; He will work this change in you for His glory and honor, if you would only ask Him with sincerity.

Blessed are the meek!

Anonymous asked,
"You know that Ada Limón poem where she’s like “i can’t help it i love the way men love”? my dad recently confessed to me that he became a shoemaker because they buried my grandma shoeless"

---

"When the plane went down in San Francisco,
I thought of my friend M. He’s obsessed with plane crashes.
He memorizes the wrecked metal details,
     the clear cool skies cut by black scars of smoke.
Once, while driving, he told me about all the crashes:
The one in blue Kentucky, in yellow Iowa.
It was almost a year before I learned
his brother was a pilot.
I can’t help it,
I love the way men love."

- Ada Limón, “Accident Report In The Tall, Tall Weeds”

Oh, how even death cannot stop love– and all the depths of grief serve to strengthen its roots to bloom. To turn loss into light, to transform sight through suffering, so that every glimpse of the grave becomes instead a fiercely tender testament to the indomitability of compassion…!

The love of a man is a love that cannot break, that never quits, that persists even secretly into eternity. There is a strength in his heart that carries thousands in fond fidelity. When a man loves, he loves with all his powers, and by his silent yet solid service to it, he will reflect the ardor of God to the aching world.

The powerful simplicity of this image really emphasizes the significance of that Most Blessed Sacrament. We recieve the very Bread of Angels-- We recieve Christ Himself, from His Own Hands! It's enough to, fittingly, bring one to their knees in awe.

What deep reverence this inspires. May we all treasure and contemplate this sacred mystery with ever deeper love and humble gratitude.

leitharstjarna:

Can you imagine what cathedrals would have been like if the medievals had access to neon lighting?
Some Vietnamese churches give a glimpse of what it might’ve been like:


 

I am wholeheartedly here for this aesthetic, oh my goodness! Talk about a Light in the darkness, for sure!

Honestly though, why don’t we incorporate more modern artistic technology into our religious spaces? Human culture is so creatively beautiful, a reflection of the infinite imagination of God, and Christ, in becoming man, embraced and blessed that creativity too. So why not bring that part of us to the altar as well?

This is honestly why I love, so much, seeing individuals creating devotional works of art– their faith and love is overflowing into a natural and unique expression of holy adoration, something that cannot be mass-produced or automated, something truly beautiful. It’s like the legends of Christmas, with the little drummer boy being the most well-known. We offer our individuality, not to destroy it, but to sanctify it– to use it to serve God instead of ourselves.

Let’s put neon in our churches– if we are moved to do so as honest worship, not just for style. That’s the key here. It’s totally fine to give God all the glitter you’ve got as long as you’re doing it for His glory, not yours. If it doesn’t move the soul into deeper love of the Lord, then even all the neon in the world won’t mean a thing. Beauty is of God, so let’s direct it all back to Him!
 

"Humility facilitates a person’s encounter with God and sheds fresh clarity on all life’s daily problems. I truly become the center of your life at such a moment. You act, you write, you speak, and you pray for me. It is no longer you who live, it is I who live within you. I become your all, and you find me in all those with whom you come in contact. Your welcome is then more compassionate; your word is more the bearer of my thought; your writings are much more the faithful expression of my mind. Yet for this to happen, how much you must detach yourself from your ego!"
-Jesus, to Fr. Gaston Courtois
 

Humility is, the more I see it, a way of living in devoted love– you become so saturated with adoration of God that you don’t even think of your self-will anymore; everything you do, think, feel, and say is soaked through with the color of Christ. “He becomes your All,” but joyfully so, not begrudgingly or ruefully. Does the soul in love ever complain about doting on their beloved? Never. It is because that love insists on expressing itself perpetually; no one forces or coerces it. Love just loves, and when you are in love, you want it to take over your life, pushing your selfish impulses gently aside, and making all your choices focused on that tenderness and happy service instead. Even when it hurts– especially when it hurts, for love proves itself most powerfully in trial!

This is how we must love Christ. This is how we are to become humble. You cannot “make yourself” humble. God’s grace will accomplish that feat, in crucifying your ego and uniting you with Jesus’s own self-sacrificial death unto true life. Only then, truly, can you live for Him, in Him, through Him, with Him, because your heart’s gaze will be fixed on Him alone. Like the poet and the lover, you will see Christ in all, and sing of Him in all, and serve Him in all.

"My degree of radiance in a soul depends on how intimately I am present. But I am always there insofar as I find in the heart of a person my meekness and my humility. In the measure with which you renounce all superiority, you enable me to grow within you. This, as you know, is the secret of all true spiritual fruitfulness in the domain of the unseen. Ask me to be as humble as I want you to be, without pretense but with utter simplicity."
- Jesus, to Fr. Gaston Courtois
 

You cannot have an intimate, loving relationship with someone whom you deem as lesser than yourself. You may protest that you do not treat Christ as such, but do you truly? How often do you put your own desires ahead of His? How often do you forsake time with Him in order to do your own thing? How often do you disdain or treat lightly His Commandments and teachings? This is no way to treat your Beloved! The subtle slights and distractions are the worst, for they rot all sincerity out of your interactions. The only cure for such encroaching doom is, indeed, humility. Only within that queen of virtues can true ardor, fidelity, and tenderness flourish. When you humbly treat another as deserving of greater merit and attention than yourself, you are not doing so out of shame or idolatry, for true humility requires charity. Humility simply loves so fiercely and gently that the soul graced with it joyfully lavishes their attention, time, and service to the beloved, seeking their highest good and yearning to love them more fully. Superiority cannot feel such a motivation, for it demands that others treat them as such! Not so the humble heart, which thrives on self-giving and communion, and asks nothing but the grace to serve more, giving no thought to any other ‘reward’ but charity itself. That is simplicity of heart, and in that purity, we can see God.

This is how Christ lives. This is how Christ loves. Humility is His royal crown. Meekness is His robe of honor. When your heart meets Him there, in that lowly yet sweet place– a secret, quiet place– it is able to embrace Him as Beloved, without self-interest or hesitation. The more you know Him, the more you can imitate Him; then you can love Him all the more, and serve Him, and bear fruit for Him. But it all starts with the grace of humility– to put your self aside, especially in simple things, for the sake of simple love. Thus you grow closer to Him constantly, and so tenderly, as that humble love begins to inundate all the tiny aspects of your life.

Christ is the Bridegroom of your soul. Do you live that way? Do you invite Him into your daily life? Do you have that humility and guileless openness to Him yet? Do you have the meekness to turn to Him in all things, and seek to do His will with all gentle submission? Do you do all of this with fidelity in love? That is what will illuminate your life with His Light– the closer you let Him hold you, the longer you embrace Him, the brighter His radiance will shine in you.

This is all so ironically difficult to put into words. Truly the simplicity of it is proven in that. When you love Christ, the tender sweetness of it– of Him– makes humility blossom. Live in Him, live with Him, live for Him, love Him!

traumacatholic:

If you’re seeing this, please take a moment to pray for yourself and your own mental health. May God comfort you in your misery, may He steady you in your anxieties, and may He strengthen you.

You are allowed to pray for yourself, remember. If you struggle with that, I do recommend praying some of the Psalms to get your heart into the first-person mode of prayer, as well as to tune more fully into the wholeness of your emotions– sadness, frustration, confusion, joy, wonder, love. Your heart will then naturally sing out on its own, now that it has heard what the music is like.

In your most dire needs, pray for faith, pray for mercy, pray for grace. Even if all you can muster is the name of Jesus, that is His name you are calling, and like any beloved one, He will come running to meet you.

God hears you, even if He doesn’t respond in a way you can hear. Trust in Him. Sometimes the most sincere and loving response cannot be heard– an embrace, a hidden kind act, a look of deepest compassion. He will steady and strengthen you, even if He does not remove the suffering. He carries that cross with You and for You. Lean on Him, and He will be an unfailing comfort even in the face of your greatest trials. Pray for this! He will give it. He loves you.

"Let them take courage who are humbled by their passions. For even if they fall into every pit and are caught in every snare, when they attain health they will become healers, luminaries, beacons and guides to all, teaching about the forms of every sickness and through their own experience saving those who are about to fall."
- St. John Climacus

As someone who carries a heavy cross of mental & physical illness, this gives me such profound comfort it moves me to sobs. It really is an awful struggle, a humiliating war, but I know that God sees me and loves me and will never abandon me. Like Joseph in the empty well, like David in the lion’s den, like Job in his devastation– these trials are given to me from the Hand of God as part of His holy and salvific plan for not just me, but all of His people. If I hold strong to faith in Him, if I persevere in prayer and draw ever closer to Christ despite all obstacles, I trust that He will give me health through Christ, and the trials I have endured will now become teachings OF God’s utter Faithfulness and purposes in the most excruciating circumstances. This is the sight given to the blind, the light to those in darkness, for I too am currently blind and shadowed and frightened and in pain. But I have a fierce fire of hope in my soul, the burning love of God the Holy Spirit, Who cannot disappoint and Who will guide me through this dark vale of tears into the greenest pastures I could ever dream of. And once He has led me there, once He has navigated me safely through the pitfalls, then I will become His servant to show others the way through, too. That is my uncrushable hope. And so I will carry this cross up this hill until, with my Jesus, I finally die to death and rise in new blessed life– through Him, with Him, for Him.

Take courage, dear heart! The tomb is empty!

tomicscomics: HOW you say matters more than WHAT you say. …Right?

Terribly relevant to the world we live in, and the curse of moral relativism, is the disturbing fact that language matters, and abuse of words is a direct affront to The Incarnate Word– Christ Jesus, Who Is Truth, and Who Created all things By His Word. In horrible contrast, the devil is a liar, The Liar, always was and is and will be, and in his hatred for God he really enjoys twisting language until the Truth is unintelligible. Political correctness, euphemisms, slang, even misused wordplay are all symptoms of this grossly cowardly offense. If you have to conceal or costume the roots of something with your words, you’re playing the devil’s game. God does not mince words or deny reality. Your words cannot change His facts, although you might bury them deep. They’re still alive, though, and when they are revealed, there will be awful consequences. After all, you can joke about murder all you want– someone is still ending up dead.

tomicscomics: We live in a society.

Oof, this is way too reflective of the state of the world lately, and not just in politics. I have sadly seen this very mindset running rampant online, especially in mental health circles, and it is lethal! Whenever we shift blame, responsibility, choice, or power onto someone else, we turn a blind eye to our own involvement– and trust me, nothing is ever a one-person affair. We all have an effect, at all times, on the people & resultant culture around us. We need to be humble enough to admit that our influence is not always a good one, even if we have no ill will. Our sins are actually contagious– you can and will spread their symptoms without actively meaning to. But you must expose yourself to it in order to catch it, and that is always your own decision! If you aren’t guarding your heart, that sinful stuff all around you will find a careless eye, an uncaring ear, or an open wound, and take root. It then festers and molds inside of our hearts, and if it’s not addressed properly, it will spread like a cancer to affect every part of us… and blaming someone else for “making you sick,” denying that you are ill, or claiming helplessness will only kill you faster, spiritually. There is a cure, but the only cure is humility & confession– admitting that you’re sick, understanding how and why, realizing that you are responsible for and seeking help from the Physician Of Souls, Christ Jesus!

In short? Don’t let pride suffocate you. Moral relativism is saying that a tickle in your throat and lung cancer cause the same cough, and it’s not a problem. Have some candy, that’ll fix it! Not so. You need to be sharply honest and discerning about the state of your soul. Your decisions matter. Your choices have consequences. You don’t get to dictate the morality of what you do, any more than you can pick what symptoms you get from a disease. So think about the spiritual environment you are putting yourself in! What are you exposing your heart to? What contaminants are you breathing & touching? Refusing to look at your hands and heart means that you’ll never see the sores and scabs adding up there. And refusing to admit that you can get sick is just toxic foolishness. Think about how you use your free will– God gave you a conscience and a brain, after all!

Knowing that the water is filthy but drinking it anyway because someone told you to is both your faults. They chose to tell you, and you chose to obey. Free will is always extant. Use it courageously. Be humble, sincere, & responsible, not a proud yet cowardly liar! Learn to stand up for the moral good. Claiming victimhood does not absolve you. Your eternal life depends on it!

tomicscomics: It’s about sending a message.

Sometimes God’s messages really are that blunt– and goofy! “A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down,” after all. But honestly… God absolutely has a sense of humor, but He also tells it to us straight. He will never sugarcoat the Truth, although He might still give it to us anxiety-prone humans in a way that makes it more palatable. Just look at Jesus’s parables!

I like to think that angels delight in having some harmless holy fun, too– Lord knows their job is arduous enough!

tomicscomics: 06/04/2020

This is the sweetest thing… and it tugs at my heart for the depths that very sweetness reveals. How often do we, like Saint Joseph, marvel at the simple yet spectacular fact of the Incarnation? How often does it really hit us that God became a little boy? He went through the entire endearingly clumsy process of learning and growing, completely dependent on His parents, pure and ingenuous and so, so small! What meekness, what love– for the Creator of All to become a tiny toddler, willingly and tenderly, wanting with all His Heart to be with us in such a gentle and intimate way.

Jesus is God become man, yes, and that is grand enough– but in that very same truth, let us never forget that first He had to be a young man– a child– a baby. A boy. What a thought!

"We could name each individual raindrop and then mourn its loss when it reaches the sea, but we understand that the water was neither lost nor diminished by rejoining the vastness from which it came."

We all die one day, yes, but have you forgotten– we were all also born? From whence did we come? God is the one Who put us here, Who knits together our tiny bodies and breathed our life into us. But these blessed vessels are finite, and one day the path will loop back around to His doorstep where we began. We will be embraced once more in the arms of the Father Who loves us.

Remember this carefully! Do we lose ourselves here? We are not raindrops! We are individual souls, and sacredly so! God has not formed us so painstakingly only to smush us back into primordial clay. Souls don’t get recycled. Bodies don’t get erased, even if they do temporarily lose their structural coherence when we leave them. But atoms persist, and relationships, and purpose. Life is neither perfunctory nor accidental. It is also not stopped by death– only changed. We arrive here, and we leave here, for a reason, and nothing is lost, and nothing is forgotten.

Death is truly a bittersweet sorrow, for the pain of loss is s temporary one, wrapped in mysterious hope. Your dearly departed have only passed from here to there, and unlike the raindrop swallowed up in sea, you will see them again– entire, beloved, and alive.

Crucifixion and Pietà, Polish folk art woodcuts, circa 1831.

I’ve never before seen a Pietà where Mary and Jesus are crowned! That speaks volumes. In that moment of profound suffering, where the Mother held her Child in agony, in death, in apparent despair– even so, He had just conquered death itself, BY dying– and in her unwavering yet severely tested faith, she shared in the first foretaste of that victory. In that beautifully heart-rending moment, we see, with our own hearts, not a vision of doom, but one of utmost love and hope. In the Pietà, Christ has still won, and Mary is now essentially the Queen of His nascent Kingdom, having been given charge of His now Cross-saved people [John 19:26].

Christ Jesus is victorious, despite everything. Glory be to God!

"Always remember that despite how people treat you or make you feel, there’s an entire heavenly court who want nothing more for you than your good. In heaven are saints who, if they could, would come back to earth and do penance just to have you in heaven with them."
-Nichola Regina

This is 1000% true. That is how deeply and powerfully and sincerely you are loved by Heaven– by God the Trinity, by His Mother, by His angels, by His Saints. Yes, all of them love you. Yes, you. Tonight, right now, just as you are, in your struggles and sadness and pain and fears and even your sin. They love you. They want you to be with them in Heaven, healed and joyous and embraced in that love forever. They would leave that paradise and suffer all your agonies for you of it meant you would be delivered safely to God… and Jesus Christ, God Himself, did do that.

No human, no devil, nothing on earth, nothing in hell, nothing in all of Creation can ever alter this fact. You are loved by Heaven as a permanently indisputable fact. And when you feel most alone and unworthy, that love holds you all the more tenderly to its heart, to the very Heart of God.

Please, remember this always. Anchor your joy in it. Never lose hope. Have faith in it. If you open your heart to recieve it, I promise you, it will guide you through even the darkest nights, straight to heaven.

Painting at the ceiling of the chapel in Mergozzo (Italy).

This art is gorgeous in and of itself, but I dearly love the subtle deeper truth– Behold, the Lamb of God, in the image of the humble, pure and innocent child, but also in the Word Spoken through Scripture read in reverence, in the ever-blooming joy flourishing in all growing things through that same Voice, and– most clearly yet most mysteriously– in the infinite and eternal paradox of the Cross, the Divine death of Self-giving Love which brought true and holy Life to those who were living in mortal emptiness.

The Word of God, the Life of God, is so close to us, all the time, in such simple and profound ways… but do we behold Him? Do we recognize His reflection in creation, His recollection in the Gospel? Do we truly grasp that reality yet unfathomable– that God is with us? For so He Is, now and until the end of all ages. Behold!

"The psychological trials of dwellers in the last times will equal the physical trials of the martyrs. But in order to face these trials we must be living in a different world."
-Fr. Seraphim Rose

I think about this so often. It’s a harrowing yet steeling truth that is more visibly relevant now than ever.

Remember that key endnote: you must be living in a different world than the secular one you must inevitably travel through. Yes, your body dwells here physically, but keep your heart & mind unstained and separate! Fix your thoughts on God, and no matter what surrounds you, your soul will be set strongly in a higher place.

“I am the servant of the Lord. I will what God wills, when He wills it, as He wills it, because He wills it.”

— Novena to Our Lady of Perpetual Help

Oh this is beautiful. Powerful, absolutely, and yet so beautiful! I could, and would love to, prayerfully meditate on this for a while.

This is why Mary is so lovable. What a heart she has!!

“Prefer nothing, absolutely nothing, to the love of Christ.”

— St. Benedict

It is, objectively, the only thing worth anything, in any world. The love of Christ is the only real thing, the only true thing. It is beauty and joy itself. It is the foundation of all existence. It is the sole and root desire of your entire heart. You were created for and from it.

If you have His Love, you have everything.

“I assure you that God is much better than you believe. He is content with a glance, a sigh of love.”

— St. Therese of Lisieux

This is both incomparably sweet and achingly tender. What a God we serve! What love He has for us– for you, personally, specifically, intimately! How He yearns for communion with us, for the tiniest return, from His beloved children. Just a glance, just a sigh, and I am sure He sings! Wouldn’t you, from the one you adore? Do you understand, even just a little, the purest beauty and ardor of the Heart of Our Lord? How can we not fall in love, too, knowing this?

“Our vision is so limited we can hardly imagine a love that does not show itself in protection from suffering. The love of God is of a different nature altogether. It does not hate tragedy. It never denies reality. It stands in the very teeth of suffering.”

— Elisabeth Elliott

This speaks volumes. God IS Love. His Love is true Love. Therefore, if His Love accepts and thrives even within suffering and pain, tragedy and trials, we have to love others in the same way. And isn’t that joyous, truly? Real Love is so powerful that it does not need to be protected from dangers– it overcomes them all, facing them outright with open arms, and transmuting them into opportunities to prove His glory– despite nothing, through everything.

So remember this. God’s Love may not deliver you from struggle– it does not need to. That struggle is no threat to Love. Instead, He meets you there, victorious and compassionate, embracing it all, you and your pain both, and so saturating even your darkest moments with purest Light.

"Should the soul say to those who forcefully seized it, “Release me, that I might repent a bit,“ no one will any longer pay him heed. Rather his fearful and relentless escorts will answer him: “When you had time at your disposal you did not repent, and yet now you intend to repent? When the stadium was open for all, you did not wrestle in any of the spiritual matches, yet now when all of the doors have been closed and the time for the matches has passed, do you want to enter into combat? Did you not hear what the Lord said, “Watch, therefore, for ye know not what hour your Lord doth come?”
Think about these and similar things, my beloved, and struggle all of the time to maintain unextinguished the lamp of your soul through works of virtue, until the Bridegroom comes and finds you ready to go with Him to the bridal chamber of the heavens, together with all of the other pure souls who also conducted themselves in the present life in accordance with His Holy Will."
- The Evergetinos, from St. Ephraim

Procrastination will murder your soul. Punctuality is a virtue. Do good now– right now, however small. It is still virtue! Pennies add up to a fortune, raindrops add up to an ocean, with persistence and faith and the grace of God. A few tiny loaves and fish can feed thousands by His Hands. Do not despair, but persevere in doing good. Start now.

Fight off every temptation; always resist them and strive to uproot their roots even when off the battlefield. Say prayers in every spare moment, even a few seconds, even just the Name of Jesus. Saturate all those tiny empty spaces with God. Carry a Bible, read a verse whenever you can. It will grow on & in you. Carry a rosary, pray it even if only in short bursts. Carry sacramentals and remind yourself of their present reality & truth. If you have even two spare minutes, stop at a church and pray or adore the Blessed Sacrament. Yes, even for only a minute! Make this a habit. Alongside this, watch a Mass or do Adoration online whenever you can. Say the Liturgy of the Hours, even if you can only manage one hour at first. Set an alarm for it. Smile at a stranger you’d otherwise avoid or ignore. Be a little extra patient and kind. Make a phone call, write a letter, say hello. Share a meal. Buy a gift. Visit the sick, the aged, the afflicted. Visit a grave. Do good always and everywhere, in the spirit of Christ, Who lovingly & mercifully helped all who came to Him. Be merciful. Strive to be holy.

All we have, by grace, is this moment. The next is a gift from God’s Hands, and on until we die. Are you using this moment gratefully, for Him? Are you sanctifying your actions with holy love & service? You are in the Stadium of Life now– are you watching from the stands, or are you wrestling in the ring? Yes you may fail & fall at first, but so what! There is no final judgment call until the end, when the King returns for you! Will He be satisfied with your persevering efforts to earn His Crown at last, despite all your weakness and frailty? For He is rewarding your love, not your power– power is His alone. Will He smile at your dedication, or will He be cut to the heart at your negligence, your laxity, your dearth of fervor and devotion? Do not fear the pain, the effort, the exhaustion– it is all worth the cost. No good thing comes easily. Be a warrior for God, a soldier for Christ, against the onslaught of demonic attacks and moral relativism and your human pride. You will only regret not picking up your sword. Even a child’s effort is viewed with genuine admiration, for we see their burning heart, not their inexperienced arms. They do not fear, or even concern themselves with, the size of the task, the struggle of the fight. They know only what must be done, and without any doubt or hesitancy, they rise to face it. Childlike courage is still pure courage, and it is true, albeit immature. They will grow into a great saint, if they persist in the grace of God. But it all starts small, so small, so vitally small. Start there, with the seeds of great trees. A spark is needed to kindle even the greatest fire. Do not give up.

Fight the good fight, right now!

"Not much experience is needed to be fully aware of human weakness and to understand that human beings—and especially the young, who are so exposed to temptation—need incentives to keep the moral law, and it is an evil thing to make it easy for them to break that law. Another effect that gives cause for alarm is that a man who grows accustomed to the use of contraceptive methods may forget the reverence due to a woman, and, disregarding her physical and emotional equilibrium, reduce her to being a mere instrument for the satisfaction of his own desires, no longer considering her as his partner whom he should surround with care and affection."
- Saint Pope Paul VI

Similarly, I fear women may be affected in the same manner! When a woman sees the gift of pregnancy– and by extension, the blessing of having a body that can conceive and bear a child– as something expendable and unimportant, even annoying or a hindrance, then she sees the entire reality of her womanhood as worthless. When a woman accepts and uses contraception, then she sees the miracle of sex as irrelevant… truly, she doesn’t see it at all. When sex becomes separated from conception, there can only be disaster, for you have mangled and sliced up the natures of your own bodies. Affection, care, tenderness, reverence, and deep love all vanish when the seed of life is stomped upon. When the blessing of children is labeled as a curse, then sex itself becomes a curse, too– something disfigured beyond recognition, bringing only death.

This is why sex and marriage must be united, never separated, just as sex and conception must be revered as one and the same. The family unit is a reflection of God, of the love and relationship of the Trinity, so perfectly seen through God’s tender work in the Holy Family. Marriage must emulate this beautiful example. Sexuality must be so respected and honored. Children, the natural fruit of the womb, must be equally cherished and never cut off. This all begins with how we see the disturbing phenomenon of artificial contraception, produced and used solely for the sake of turning sex into an empty and dirty play-thing instead of recognizing it as an inherently sacred and intimate act of life.

We must never understate the absolutely central significance of this issue to the very heart of society and human culture as a whole.

“The most important person on earth is a mother. She cannot claim the honor of having built Notre Dame Cathedral. She need not. She has built something more magnificent than any cathedral—a dwelling for an immortal soul, the tiny perfection of her baby’s body— The angels have not been blessed with such a grace. They cannot share in God’s creative miracle to bring new saints to Heaven. Only a human mother can. Mothers are closer to God the Creator than any other creature; God joins forces with mothers in performing this act of creation… What on God’s good earth is more glorious than this; to be a mother?”
- Venerable Jozsef Cardinal Mindszenty

Reflect on this awe-inspiring reality for a moment, a truth we take for granted and tragically forget the holiness of... every soul incarnate on this earth is here because of a mother. Women are the gates of love through which God sends life into the world. Yes, a man must unite with her as a key, but this beautiful cooperation serves to further dignify both! The man who unlocks and the woman who opens are both reverently, wonderfully dignified in the work of God, Who gives them a child through that gate of love.

But oh, what a marvel is motherhood. Nothing else on earth can do what a mother does: to form a human body to house a human soul. And-- do we truly grasp the gorgeous gravity of it?-- she forms that tiny body from her own body, from the materials that her own cathedral consists of. As she breathes and builds her own temple, as we all do daily, she now naturally takes from those same sacred resources and, with God's invisibility perfect direction, gives them up to God for the sake of sheltering another soul. This deeply loving sacrifice of life is so amazing, so worthy of the greatest respect! Every mother works with the Master Architect Himself, the One Who knits bone and sinew and blood all together, by giving her womb as His workshop of wonders, and there He gives us life anew. Life! Real, fragile, true, breathing and blessed with a heartbeat-- a baby. What joy.

Yes, what suffering too, but what is love without suffering? Do we not adore the Cross in its eternal testament to this fact? The joy is worth infinitely more than the pain. The miracle is worth any and every price to accomplish-- just ask a mother. My own mother went through so much to get me into this world, and she has never once regretted it-- indeed, she now rejoices that her sacrifices allowed for my birth to occur. She sees me and does not mourn the struggle at all; she remembers seeing my tiny face for the first time, and cherishes it to this day. She is my mother, the gate and guardian of my life, through whom God Himself put me here, and I will honor her always. Thank God for motherhood.

"Do you not know that you are God's temple and that God's Spirit dwells in you? If anyone destroys God's temple, God will destroy him. For God's temple is holy, and you are that temple." (1 Corinthians 3:16-17)

Protect all children! Protect all mothers!

"Don’t worry if your heart won't respond: do the best you can. You are certainly under the guidance of the Holy Ghost, or you wouldn’t have come where you now are: and the love that matters is His for you - yours for Him may at present exist only in the form of obedience. He will see to the rest."
-C.S. Lewis

No matter how deep the desolation, God is with you.

When you feel utterly hollow, when you cannot even remember what love and joy feel like, then lift your poor ragged heart to Him nevertheless and pray– “Lord, I want to love You. I want to obey You. I want to rejoice in You. But I have no strength of my own; I cannot feel anything at all. Without Your help I am lost, and I know You do not want to lose me. So please– help me.”

Pray no matter what. “God, my heart feels empty, but I still love You. I choose to love You even if I cannot feel it. And I know You love me even if I cannot perceive it. Please give me the grace to act accordingly. Do not let me give in to despair.” Trust God, radically so, and hold on to hope like the life-raft it is.

Love is the most powerful when it is tried by fire. When love is given the opportunity to prove itself in the face of great opposition, it secretly rejoices to crush the odds. Oh, it does. Watch a dandelion bloom through solid concrete. Watch a billion breezes carve out the Grand Canyon. Love is unstoppable, by virtue of its existence– feelings don’t affect that fact whatsoever. Yes, it is wonderful and good and right to feel it, but it can and does exist outside of them at times, vital times, to show you that it will. Act upon the reality of Love, despite every obstacle, and you will soon find that it has taken up deeper roots in your heart than it ever could have otherwise.

Consider the spiritual dryness to be a form of anesthetic, if you will. God has to do deep work to plant His holiness ever the more strongly and solidly in your soul. So, at times, you won’t be able to feel things. But those are the times when the most profound growth can occur… if you cooperate with it. So, beloved, do not fear. Do not despair. Hope carries you like a mother, Faith protects you like a father, Love makes you His child. Live according to that calling, no matter the numbness, and watch miracles eventually occur– for the Holy Spirit will, indeed, see to the rest.

"Remember that true holiness is accompanied by pains and tribulations from within and without, by attacks of visible and invisible enemies, by trials of body and mind, by desolations and prolonged aridities; “and all that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution” (2 Tim. iii. 12) —that is to say, all sorts of trials from demons, from men, and from our rebellious flesh. Be generous, and remember that you ought to walk in the footsteps of your Redeemer. We must not serve God for the sake of His consolations, but because He is worthy of being served."
-St. Paul of the Cross

I’ve been reflecting on this frequently lately, and taking note on how it feels in my heart, with the immense struggles, pains, trials, & confusions I have been recently afflicted with.

When love is deep, true and honest, consolations are cherished indeed but not sought. It’s so wondrous. True love will and does love the beloved for their own dear sake– not because of any gain, recompense, acknowledgement, or even personal comfort.

I love God, and when He lays His Hand upon my life in suffering, I may indeed become frustrated and frightened because I feel lost and helpless, but does this make me angry at God? No! Do I spurn Him? Never! I instead realize all the more that I need Him and must trust Him more completely. And I can only do this because I love Him.

Demonic attacks are horrific but the devil only attacks his enemies. Mental and physical trials are exhausting but Christ’s Passion gives me fortitude. Desolations and aridity feel like death itself but Life has risen from the grave and I must be faithful to that, to Him, for His sake alone. Even when I am dry as a desert in my soul, He is Living Water, and if I persist in prayer and devotion to that truth then I have a strange sort of pure satisfaction, even if I don’t get any rain. The ocean still exists, and I love it dearly, and that is enough. Yes I want it in my life, but God understands infinitely more than I. Only He knows if and when I truly need consolation. And I must surrender completely to His Holiest discretion.

I have faced a great many awful trials and will inevitably suffer more. My body and mind do throw fits and scream and wail in pain. Often my prayers are just terrible wracked sobs, “God help me; I don’t understand but I trust You; Please sustain me with Your grace,” etc. But deepest down, it’s love. Somehow, still, it persists, like flowers through concrete. Love itself is actually consolation enough. Even when my emotions tank, I know that God is Love, and that He loves me because Christ loves me, and Mary loves me by Him too, and even on my worst & empty days I want to love God and strive to act accordingly, even feebly, even if despair tells me otherwise. This simple reality of divine Love is an unfailing hope, an anchor against all storms.

I thank God for this grace and beg Him to tend it in my soul, so that pride is crushed at its inception and devils are guarded against. I weep that I am so unworthy of it. But I post this to give some gracious comfort to others in their hearts that love God too. The Holy Spirit is with us. Do not trust your feelings; many beautiful truths are intangible, yet they remain. Love for Love’s pure sake. God will do this in You. All glory be to Him!

"Our guilt begins from the point when we favorably incline ourselves toward a passion that has been observed; that is, we do not rush to acknowledge the enemy and do not arm ourselves against it with anger. On the contrary, we accept it and begin liking it, delighting in the impulse in which it appeared. This already shows that we have no objection to being familiar with the passionate, and, subsequently, enemies of God. “Because the carnal mind – the passionate - is enmity against God” (Romans 8:7)."
-St. Theophan the Recluse

Key points here:

1. Acknowledge that the passion is the enemy. Name it as such, without justification or excuse. Admit that you are inclined to this evil– don’t let pride deny it. Confessing your weakness is the first step to combating it at all.

2. Be angry at it. Be furious that such an evil is tempting you against God! If it is His enemy, it must be your enemy– no exceptions.

3. Refuse to become friendly or familiar with these passions. Turn them away at the door– don’t let them in even for a minute. They may still persist in knocking, so you must persist in resistance. Struggle is not failure. Fighting is your only hope of freedom.

4. Remember that, without God’s help and grace, you can do nothing. Pray always, pray earnestly, pray unceasingly.

If you too suffer great guilt from giving in to your weakness to passions, bring this before Christ with all humility, and begin the battle again with the merciful assistance of Our Lord & Lady. Do not despair! Fight the good fight of faith!

lilaccatholic: Lol literally the devil is so boring and dumb. “You’re worthless” And? Even if that were true Jesus still died for me so clearly there’s something worthwhile in there. Die mad about it.

thor-nn:

Seriously though, REMEMBER THIS.

Worthless? Never. Satan knows the God-given worth of your soul– otherwise he wouldn’t be trying so hard to steal it!! He’s a petty liar and manipulator.

Satan wants you to despair and die in sin. God wants you to trust in His infinite Mercy and live. God LOVES you; if you doubt that for a single moment, just look at the Cross. Jesus died to save you before you even knew Him, before you even cared, because He loves you that profoundly.

Remember the parable of the prodigal son. God is waiting for you on that road home, arms open, heart open. He already forgives you. You just need to open your heart to admit your need of it, and run into His saving embrace.

"I know that no one has ever seen or heard God, except the One who comes in the name of God: he has seen the Father (cf. Jn 6:46). But I also know that he speaks to me every day in my inmost depths, and I hear him in the silence that gives rise to mutual listening, the desire for communion and love. God is a light that illumines and radiates noiselessly. His flame blazes, but its brilliance is silent. God shines and blazes like a sun. He burns like a furnace, but he is inaudible. This is why I think that it is important to allow ourselves to be inundated by God’s silence, which is a voiceless word."
-Cardinal Sarah

Now that American quarantine measures are being relaxed, and summer festivities are beginning, the troubles of secular entertainment and noise and busyness are flaring up in the baleful heat. Be warned– you cannot hear God in all that chatter. Make time to sit in stillness and silence this summer, for the sake of your soul. Listen to the quietness of the Heart of God. It is the only way to survive spiritually.

“I implore you, brethren, never to break or despise the rule of this prayer: A Christian when he eats, drinks, walks, sits, travels or does any other thing must continually cry: ‘Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy upon me.’ So that the name of the Lord Jesus descending into the depths of the heart, should subdue the serpent ruling over the inner pastures and bring life and salvation to the soul. He should always live with the name of the Lord Jesus, so that the heart swallows the Lord and the Lord the heart, and the two become one. And again: do not estrange your heart from God, but abide in Him, and always guard your heart by remembering our Lord Jesus Christ, until the name of the Lord becomes rooted in the heart and it ceases to think anything else.”
-St. John Chrysostom

This is a holy truth and it works. Only by this constant recitation of prayer can our hearts be kept on the straight and narrow, and the tempter chased away. Oh how easily our hearts get distracted and stray! But this little powerful prayer brings us home.

Abide in Him so! It is achieved by such small yet incessant rededications. Breathe His name, drink it in like water. Let it inundate you in every moment. Do not despair if you slip– just return quickly, pleading mercy, and He will embrace you again.

This works. It is achievable by all through grace and love and hope. Just think of Christ, always. Just turn your thoughts to Him whenever you can, and He will increase this frequency of visits– He will wholeheartedly requite your feeble yet honest love.

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy upon me!

"God is saying that it will be hard for believers. The more you enter into the mystery of faith, the harder it will be in this world. You will become more and more aware of the idleness of this world, the hustle and bustle, the rhythm. Music, conversation, worldly festivals will become alien to you. And the more you feel the sweetness of the spiritual, the harder you will feel the spiritual lowliness of the carnal, all that our world lives with today. But there is no need to be afraid! All things can be overcome when the Lord is near. He has overcome the world…"
-Hegumen Raphael (Bolevich)

Despite my great sinfulness and unworthiness, I can attest to this– it is indeed so hard to dwell in the carnal world now that my soul has tasted, however briefly, the sweetness of the spiritual! It frustrates me to tears, the progressively more alien world and its desires, both without and within. I frustrate myself to tears, when I do not enter into the mystery of faith as frequently and fully as I truly yearn to. Sometimes this hardness, and my weakness, drains me almost to despair. But I must not. There is one undying Hope, and that is Christ my Lord! He can, and has, overcome all things. I must meditate on that. Christ has overcome the world… what does that mean to my soul? It means this hardness cannot and will not last. Only Christ endures. In the end, and even now, He triumphs. With that thought in my poor heart, I can carry on.

“We are at times reduced to a material or animal perseverance, or even to simply being there, like a rock, without really knowing why, nor to what purpose. It is like a narrow room without light or air. Still, one goes on by a sort of gravitational law. Later, one realizes that perseverance is a pure grace, independent of any personal merit. Then, the Spirit once again breathes life into our dried bones; we get up and go on.”
-(A Carthusian)

Perseverance is a pure grace.

Lord, what a terribly wonderful truth that is. When we have nothing left, when we are hollow and empty and lost, God is still there, and He alone lifts us up, and because of Him we go on.

When I hit rock bottom, and I cannot so much as lift my head on my own, I will cling to this truth. I will cling to grace. It is all I have left, and it is all I need. God alone is sufficient. Hope does not disappoint.

“…what higher, more exalted, and more compelling goal can there be than to know God?”

— J.I. Packer

What other true and honorable knowledge is there, but that of God? What other knowledge lasts for all eternity, and is not reliant on faltering human thought to discover? What other knowledge is worth seeking above all other things? There is none. Truly, we need to prioritize our holy role as students of Our Lord, and spend dedicated, devoted time every day learning more about Him.

Pray, read your Bible, read the Catechism and other holy books, and go to Mass. There is no loftier, lovelier goal in this life. Know God as deeply as you can now– this will make the hope and joy of heaven’s knowledge all the sweeter.

Q: What hath God done for you?
A: God hath made me, He keepeth me, and He can save me.

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately.

God has, literally, done everything for me. I wouldn’t exist without Him. He knit me together in my mother’s womb, He knew my name before I could breathe, He had me in mind before the stars were formed. He created me and everything and everyone that I love and treasure in this life… but He is my truest love and treasure, because He loved and treasured me first. He put that love into my heart by loving me and by being Love and making me to share that love with Him. It’s all too magnificent for my little heart to comprehend, but I will think about it forever, and rejoice in it.

God made me, He keeps me made– He teaches and guides and disciplines and corrects me– He protects my body and soul, my mind and heart, He counts every eyelash and blood cell and breath. He loves me more than I can ever imagine… so how could I ever imagine I could be forgotten or lost? Never, never, not to the One Who Loves. I tremble that in my weakness I can get lost, but I find undying hope in knowing– knowing!– that my Good Shepherd will seek me out, this feeble frightened lamb, and carry me warmly home, safe on His shoulders, singing.

God can save me from anything. God can save me from everything. I need only trust in that Truth. I need only to believe in Him, in What and Who He Is. And when I remember that He Is Love– when I see His Love, proven forever on the Cross– oh, I do, I do believe. I can be saved, and by Love, by God– by grace, merciful grace– I will be.

"Thank You, Jesus, for never leaving my side no matter what I go through."

I think we all need to be regularly reminded of this. It’s such a simple yet staggering truth.

No matter what we go through– inside or outside, joy and sorrow, laughter and pain, beauty and terror– Jesus is with is. He Incarnated so that He could be with us, in all of the situations and circumstances of being human. There will never be a moment in your life in which Christ is not there with you. You are never alone, even when you feel you are, fear you are, or wish you were out of shame. Christ is there, steadfast and sincere, His Heart overflowing with love for you, no matter what. He is with you, always… and not even death can change that.

Thank You, Jesus, for staying with us. Thank You for loving us so much that You even want to stay, even when we’re at our worst. Thank You, Jesus, for You.

spacekrakens: I need some prayers today, ive cried like twice today even in math class and im scared im gonna break down in my next class
 

Oh sweetheart I am praying for you. God sees your tears and He cries with you; Christ shares your suffering and is holding your heart safe even if you cannot feel it through the pain. I pray that He continues to uphold you through whatever is causing you this great distress– and that He also blesses you with healing through both tears and joy at the right times. It’s all important. But cling to Him now, when you feel weak and fragile and scared. He will be your shelter, He will give you strength, He will help you breathe. Trust in His gentle and tender love for You. God bless you. 🙏💙

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Saint Dismas is arguably my most beloved Patron Saint. Everything about his story speaks so strongly to my heart, in the most powerfully bittersweet ways. He means a lot to me– as does the hope that Christ has given another poor sinner like me, through him. Lord, remember us! 🙏

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“To give life to someone is the greatest of all gifts. To save a life is the next. Who gave life to Jesus? It was Mary. Who saved his life? It was Joseph. Ask St. Paul who persecuted him. Saint Peter who denied him. Ask all the saints who put him to death. But if we ask, “Who saved his life?” Be silent, patriarchs, be silent, prophets, be silent, apostles, confessors and martyrs. Let St. Joseph speak, for this honor is his alone; he alone is the savior of his Savior.”

— Blessed William Joseph Chaminade

We tend to overlook this stunning fact because Saint Joseph never sought recognition or praise for his humbly heroic actions– He acted solely out of Holy obedience and love. But it is for that very reason that his actions truly do merit the highest praise and recognition! Saint Joseph, who gave your whole life in silent love for our Savior, may your name as his father be forever blessed!

alwaysabeautifullife:

Good morning time to talk about Dad (St. Joseph) again

-is cool

-powerful

-he’s my dad now
 

I’m doing the 33-day consecration to Saint Joseph and it is honestly life-changing. He is such a holy, loving, powerful, blessed man! My love for him as a saint and as my spiritual father is deepening daily, and I am so grateful.

So yes– Saint Joseph is, indeed, the coolest dad. 💛

em>

"When the Enemy of your souls whispers, “You have lost all, you cannot be saved,” answer him: “I do not despair of my salvation, for I have a compassionate and long-suffering God. And this conviction upholds me in my belief that He who commanded that we forgive our fellow man for his transgressions against us even seven times seventy - that He, by the same token, will forgive the sins of all who with their whole souls turn to Him.”"
-The Evergetinos

I forget this simple yet powerful truth so often: that Our Lord commanded us to forgive others so graciously, and that He also forgave those who crucified Him even as He died– and that in both cases, there was no apparent contrition or even awareness of wrongdoing. So why do we despair? Do we so easily and wrongly assume our God is as cruel as we are, so unwilling to pardon offenses, so unable to let go of grudges and old wounds? Do we, in hating ourselves for our weaknesses and failures, assume that God would inevitably hate us too? Do we so quickly forget that His Ways are infinitely more righteous and Holy than ours? And do we even more tragically forget that such righteousness and holiness includes compassion, gentleness, longsuffering, and mercy?

Do not despair. When you feel hopelessly crushed by the weight of your sins, look to the Cross– Christ carried that weight for you and still does, out of purest Love. Look to Him and find hope in the profound meaning of His Pierced Heart– that eternal spring of deepest mercy. As long as you sincerely lay your own heart bare before Him, confessing your sins, He will wash them away with the utmost loving care. Do not be afraid. No matter how lost you feel, Jesus waits to give you all the grace you need.

"A brother, possessed by sadness and melancholy, went to an Elder and asked him: “What am I to do? My thoughts present me with the idea that perhaps in vain I denied the world, and that I cannot be saved.” Pensively, the Elder answered him as follows: “My child, even if we do not succeed in reaching the promised land, it is better that we should give our carcasses to the desert than return to the Egypt of fearful enslavement” (Number 14:29-33)."
-Evergetinos, Volume I, Hypothesis I

God is in the desert; He is not in the hedonism and pagan idolatry of Egypt. The desert is brutal and frightening and harsh, true, but God is there in that golden suffering– purifying your heart, mind, and body to become holy! Yes, it is far better to die in the desert struggle than to rot in the corrupted city, for if we do not reach the Promised Land in this life, we shall still have the hope of reaching it in the afterlife, by the loving mercy of God, Who we have so striven to pursue and imitate here. It is tempting to return to the alleged comforts of the world, but remember– all that is ephemeral and subject to death. It is only through dying to this death that we will recieve true life and rest with God. Your sacrifice for Him is never in vain. Keep this truth in your heart when the trials are fierce; God is trustworthy, and there is always hope in Him.

"Another brother asked the same Elder: “Father, to what does the Prophet refer when he says, ‘there is no salvation for him in his God” (Psalm 3:3)?“ The elder gave the following response to the brother’s inquiry: “He is referring to thoughts of despair, which the demons place before the sinner, saying: ‘Neither now nor hereafter is it possible for God to save you.’ With such counsel they try to cast the sinner into despair. But a person must contrast these thoughts with the words of Holy Scripture: ‘Mine eyes are ever toward the Lord, for He shall pluck my feet out of the snare’ (Psalm 24:15).”
-The Evergetinos

Psalm 3 continues as the Elder says= “Many say to my soul: ‘There is no salvation for him in his God.’ But Thou, O Lord, art my protector, my glory, and the lifter up of my head… Salvation is of the Lord: and Thy blessing is upon Thy people.”

The demons do indeed quote Scripture, but they never quote the truth of it. They leave out the wholeness, the context, the heart. Ironically, the best way to refute them is to prayerfully go straight TO Scripture and read the entirety of what they are misrepresenting. In any case, you are now safe in the Word of God, a sure and unfailing weapon against all falsehood and despair.

“Do not enter into dialogue with temptation. Allow me to repeat it: have the courage to run away and the moral strength not to dally with your weakness or wonder how far you can go. Break off, with no concessions!”

— St. Josemaría Escrivá: Furrow, n. 137

The serpent is smarter than you. Admit this with fearful humility; admit your weakness and crush your proud desire to test or try it. Flee immediately to Christ, like a child who knows that he has no strength of his own and needs his Father’s help! There is true courage in this– only a fool speaks to the snake, whose only goal is to poison him.