prismaticbleed: (soniccity)


lightning

She's always been lightning, to me. I've never paused to consider the depths as to why. My immediate impression is of the ultraviolet flash they illuminate the nightblack skies with, when they crash in jagged glory from one end of thunder to the next, from heaven to earth, a crash of power and fire. I think of how childhood tempests always echoed the Last Judgment to me, the suddenness and brilliance and inescapable terror-wonder of it, and how now in my adulthood she has become the new and living icon of that inevitable day in her own right. And I think of death, too, of the Lichtenberg figures of blood beneath my skin and how she pulls them into the iron-ozone air. She reminds me of the clear defibrillating charge to resuscitation, to a hope of resurrection, the sheer force of life even at the brink of the grave. She is a spark in the storms of my heart. 

prismaticbleed: (soniccity)

ceiling

There was no ceiling, in fact. There never had been. The room was domed by open sky, by endless stars, by soaring comets and brilliant nebulae and all sorts of cosmic treasures. The room had no floor, either; there were only endless miles of green, of blue, of brown and red and yellow– trees and fields and oceans and rivers, mountains and hills and canyons and caves, plateaus and tundras and deserts and dunes. What were walls, to a world. What were borders, what were boundaries, what were limits? What was a ceiling but a nonsense word, a nonexistent cap on an infinite climb, a vertical ascent stretching out beyond the atmosphere? There was no ceiling, there never would be, and life rejoiced for it forevermore.

prismaticbleed: (held)

content

It’s raining outside. It’s the first week of December, the air is flirting with 50 Fahrenheit, and the pavement is as soaked as summer. Hazy rainbows cloak every streetlight and every car hisses past like an oceanic sigh. Behind us, through cracked-open screens, the rich warm aroma of steak and marinade lazily drifts, in jovial defiance of the encroaching cold. Christmas lights swirl about the porch, entwining with well-worn wood– aged, luminous, mist-touched. Our arms do the same. Content in quiet wintry perfection, life ebbs and flows all around us. It’s raining outside.

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welcome

It’s more of a feeling than it is a word, really. Even if you first open your eyes to pitch-thick black, or to screaming fearful yellow, or to hot gurgling red, the feeling remains, echoing, pulsing in multicolored veins. Welcome, welcome. Welcome to the System, to the Spectrum, to your collective heart. Welcome to Us, that deep embrace repeats, speaking of starlit cities and glassy oceans and labyrinthine woods. Caves and towns and clear skies and thunderstorms, volcanoes and stairwells and deserts and snow, all of it inundated with it, with you. Welcome home, it all says, aching and scarred and trembling and dizzy with gilded love. Welcome home.

prismaticbleed: (Default)

instigate


She was an instigator, she always had been. Dropping matches into teapots. Leaving spice jars untapped. Searing bright promises across plaster walls. She sang like a kettledrum with sequins in it.
Every step she took brought flowers. Every name she touched burst into light. Every day she walked into was enraptured, left topsy-turvy and jubilant.
Her eyes could instigate a revolution of the heart. Her name could change your life.

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approached

She had woken up without her plush rabbit, and rubbing her eyes, was surprised to find him missing from both her bed and bedroom. With a small, exhausted stretch, she stumbled out into the hallway, tiny fists scrubbing at the corners of her eyes, ears ringing dimly in the unnatural silence. Peeking into her parents room, she whispered for a reply, but received only a snore. Tired and a little miserable, she shut the door and padded further down the hall.
Then, turning the corner to the living room, she saw him.
Moonlight was streaming in through the curtains, painting the familiar room in hues of alien silver, washing everything in secrecy. And there was her rabbit, sitting on the couch, his little black eyes brighter than any buttons had the right to be.
She stood still for a moment, holding her breath, as her toy glittered in the dark. Was she dreaming? Was she awake?
Lifting a tiny paw, her rabbit waved.
And smiling, blissfully ignorant of time, the girl approached.

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crook

In the crook of his arm the shepherd held it, like a glossy sort of egg, like a too-large marble, a globe unhinged and placed there as gently as a child. It hummed like a midnight tune as he rocked it softly. His eyes glowed as green as its lush surface, as blue-swift as its rivers and oceans. It was his world, his darling blessed world, his beloved sphere.

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unfolding

Like a flower, like a book, like a great ream of silk, it opened-- it rolled, like a wave of sea water. He felt it collapsing within his ribs; opening, closing, opening again... a great roiling truth that had been loosed, never again to be overlooked or forgotten.
The future had been unhooked. The possibility of tomorrows had been promised, all at once, in a rush like something gold and rich and sharply cold. Life was unfolding, unfolding, like a toy in a child's hands, like a heart coiled up into itself, like a butterfly burst forth from the womb of death.
There was a glow on the horizon, a great crescendo of jubilant roses, and it would never fall again.

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tame

What does it truly mean, to “tame” a beast, she thought? What does one expect of such a creature? Surely the wildness in their heart has not abated. The creature sleeping and sighing under her hand was no less fierce than he had been before they had met, a terribly passionate thing running unfettered through the leagues of green around her home. Yet now he was content to lie on the floors of the same castle he once spat upon, suddenly shockingly gentle as he snored.
The princess smiled, softly, tenderly. Perhaps that was what it truly meant, to “tame” a beast. Perhaps it simply meant that here, with her, he felt no desire to bare his fangs. Here, there was no war, no danger. With her, he could afford to be tame… and so could she.

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stolen

“You’ve stolen my heart” was the sole speechless thought on the mans mind as he fell shakily to his knees, woozy with euphoric shock, hands clutching his sodden red shirt with all the ardor of a bridegroom. You actually stole it! How–?
But the creature before him– and what better word was there for you than creature, beloved created thing, breath of God wrapped in bones– was silent. Blood was murmuring in rivers down its velvet arms, black as night, black as the centers of his eyes. Black as love. God, what–
He watched and breathed as the being moved, blinked, lazily shifted its cradled arms and the man gasped as raw flesh met new starlight. There’s something that should be inside of me touching something that should be outside of everything, his mind flickered like confetti under a stage light. God. If he ever got it back he knew he’d never be the same, he’d have the fingerprints of angels under his ribs, butterfly-dust of galaxies in his veins, a rush of wingbeats in his ears–
You stole it, he laughed again, then sobbed. Did not. I gave it to you. Everything. How could I not?
The beloved thief sighed in its sanguine rapture. The man felt every atom of it.

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flour

She had heard of leaving a trail of breadcrumbs, sure, but this was something else– a line of floury white footprints leading from her kitchen’s back door into the deep woods.
The girl stooped down to look closely at them, puzzled. They weren’t even shoe marks, but impressions of bare feet, and they were surprisingly solid, as if every step had been freshly powdered. Even curiouser, there were tiny brown speckles dusted through every mark. Hesitantly, she dabbed a fingertip to one and tasted it. Her eyebrows arched as she identified not just the obvious flour but also cinnamon, nutmeg, and– was that a hint of clove? Had to be. She’d recognize that flavor anywhere.
The girl stood back up, furrowing her brow and humming a low note of consideration. This is the sort of thing they write fairy tales about, she mused. I’d best be careful…

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derived

The syringe glittered like a prism in the sunlight, strangely glossy and luminous, unlike anything he’d ever seen before.
“What’s that you got there,” a young scruffy man with a shaky voice inquired from where he sat, fingers tapping, on the side of a patient bed, as the doctor lifted the needle to squint at it in concentration.
“Very potent healing serum,” he replied matter-of-factly, pushing the plunger until the strange liquid dripped from the needle like dew, “very exclusive, very rare. We derive it from unicorn tears. So as you can imagine, it’s–”
“Oh please!” The patient scoffed, with a laugh that was half jeering, half hysteric. “You can tell me what it is, doc. I’m not a kid you’ve gotta make up stories for. I can handle the truth.” Yet he swallowed hard even as he said it.
“I just did,” the doctor responded with unusual gravity, and the man’s insides shook. “Better learn to handle it better, I might suggest, or it’s going to be much more difficult for you to adjust to your sudden transition.” He lifted the needle like a single horn. “I understand the shock, but keep this in mind… some worlds are more magical than others, and this is one of them.”
He smiled, showing a mouth full of teeth no human had any right to have.
“Now hold out your arm. This might tingle a little.”

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canned

"Dude, your family's got the weirdest shit in the kitchen," Deon commented over the television's background chatter. "Never even heard of half that stuff. Can't even tell what half of it even is. Glad I don't live here, man, imagine my looking for lunch in THAT Pandora's Box of a pantry." He good-naturedly elbowed Santiago in the ribs. "I'd probably end up opening a literal can of worms, am I right?"
"That or a can of wormholes," Santiago mumbled from where he was sprawled across the motheaten couch, eyes locked on the TV as he rubbed his side absentmindedly. "We've got enough of those too."
Deon let out a huff of laughter. "Psh, yeah, that would be a nightmare! Imagine: You get the munchies and end up halfway across the galaxy."
Santiago glared up at him through a curtain of rusty dreads. "It's no laughing matter, bro."
"Dude. Chill," the bro in question reassured him. "They don't even make canned wormholes, except maybe in bad sci-fi films. You're not gonna end up stranded on Alpha Centauri for misreading a label. That's literally impossible."
"Is not."
"Is too, dude, we ain't on Star Trek if you haven't noticed."
Santiago glared at his friend momentarily, then shoved himself onto his bare feet and purposefully walked over to the small kitchen.
Deon raised his eyebrows at that unusual response, quickly punching the "mute" button before shifting up onto one leg to peer halfway over the back of the couch. Santiago was sifting angrily through an upper cupboard, its contents clattering loudly.
The boy on the couch winced. "Hey man, I didn't mean no offense," he began, as Santiago suddenly stopped digging and began walking back with something clutched in one sleeve-hidden hand. "If your family's got canned space or some shit I'm not gonna question it, hell with that kitchen I wouldn't even be surprised--"
"Here. Look."
"This better not be some shitty joke, San, there's enough of those on these sitcoms--"
"LOOK."
"Sheesh, dude, I'm looking." Deon muttered, inspecting the item being presented two inches from his face. An oddly dark cylinder was gripped tightly in one of his friend's reddened hands, the other posed with its fingers locked onto the pull-tab top.
"Can’t see much through your hands, man," Deon began, tilting his head in a futile effort to read whatever was written beneath them, but his train of thought was cut short as Santiago yanked upwards on the tab.
There was a sudden whoosh like an airlock being opened too fast, and then total silence as Deon peered into 19 oz of infinity.
"…The hell am I looking at."
"A wormhole."
Deon shook his head. "No way, dude."
"Yes way," was the simple reply, as his unsettlingly unperturbed friend turned back around. "I thought you said you wouldn't be surprised?"
"I know what I said, I--" But Deon was still spluttering. "Just-- an /actual/ wormhole? In your kitchen? In a CAN?"
"Hey, you're the one who said my family's got weird shit, dude," Santiago smirked, as he placed it in the refrigerator.

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honorable

“Sacrificing your own honor in order to honor another,” she growled, “means there’s no longer any ‘honor’ in the equation at all. Do you realize that?”
The boy in the chair was silent, his body crumpled in on itself like a rejected script.

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stem

The flowers were made of glass. Stretching on for what seemed like miles in the sunlight, they carpeted the world with a glittering delicacy, catching the glow and holding it within their translucent hearts as if it had been born there. There were thousands– a sea of jubilant fragility.
Moved to silence, the traveler knelt to inspect a single rose more closely, awestruck by the hues. The perfectly-formed leaves were a luminous green; the petals were richly red, glossy and deep. Other flowers shone just as gloriously all around him– here, a blue to rival the sky; here, a yellow as vivid as joy… here, a triumphant violet, a stunning pink, a white as glossy as the moon on water.
He gently brushed his calloused brown fingers along an emerald stem, smooth as an ocean stone, and a tender smile crinkled his face. What wonders. What a beautiful place.

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psycho

“I don’t really mind when they call us a psycho,” the white-haired boy murmured in the dark, to violet eyes across the room. “You know why?”
“I’ve got a feeling, kid,” the bandaged warrior replied. “Fill me in.”
He smiled, brightly but vaguely, gaze still unfocused somewhere above his knees. “It’s the word root,” his voice glowed. “Greek. ‘Psykhe.’ It means soul. I know that’s not what they’re getting at, there’s a lot of mutation in the word history, but…”
The boy looked up then, visage bright as sunlight scattered across the ocean. “I like it. It’s all about the spirit, the mind, both. Deep down stuff. The real stuff, that burns down in your bones like harp strings. Everything that turns the dark night of the soul into the lightshow of the century. Things like…” he paused, softly. “…Like you.”
The violet one smiled at that, a genuine spontaneous thing, her eyes like neon turned down low.
“Kind of makes the bad days worth it, huh?” she mused.
The boy laughed at that, just as suddenly, just as sincerely.
“Kind of?” His voice was a cathedral bell. “Laurie. With you, there are no bad days.”
She grinned at that, widely. “Psycho.”
“That’s the point!”

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might

A soldier clad in gold stood alone, his people huddled in hope and fear behind him, facing the hordes of ghastly invaders now gathered at their city’s doorstep.
He was not afraid. There was a might within him that was greater than any force, any show of vicious strength, any martial grandeur they could throw at him.

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derailed

A heavyset man in a crisp white suit sat and watched the skytrains rumble outside his office. His desk was positioned directly opposite a grand floor-to-ceiling bank of windows, giving him a perfect view of the metropolitan docking stations, of their elegantly spiraling silver “rails” flowing out into the sky, and most of all, of the trains themselves– strange fluid engines that appeared more molten than machine, technology that blurred the line between automated and alive.
He was pondering this when the room intercom light blinked on, washing the white decor with a deep blue glow, and a splash of hasty clattering static from the speakers.
“Sir,” a voice immediately sputtered into the air, just as shaky as it was awestruck, “–Train #0076 has derailed.”
At this the suited man sat up straight, his eyes widening. “Derailed?” he repeated simply, as if he was convincing himself it was true. He was used to surprise news, but this…
“Yessir,” came the jittery reply.
He let himself sink back into his chair, unsure whether to worry or wonder, especially since the latter was already flooding him. A skytrain derailing was no ordinary situation, nor was it an accident. It was, instead, a rare and incredible incident when a particular train disengaged itself from its winding rail… and began to float along its own invisible path, entirely unprogrammed. To see one derailing a year was incredibly lucky, but the event was so unique– and so important to those who studied such inexplicable technological behavior– that it was constantly whispered about by those inside the industry, and the possibility never left anyone’s head entirely.
To think, that it was happening right now–
“I’ll be right there,” he spoke, and turned off the intercom channel, the only blue left in the room caught in his eyes. They turned to face the windows once more, and then he jumped up from his chair without a second glance, and rushed out the door.

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fortress

Her heart was a fortress, a battlement of cathedral spires, soaring spiked and indomitable into the violet skies of her life, spearing every rebel angel that dared approach.
Her fists were cornerstones. Her voice was a thousand calls to war, a thousand shouts of victory.

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blaming

Sickness, misfortune, disaster… when something went terribly awry, something far beyond the control of any mortal, every finger in town still pointed towards one shadowy figure. Every voice spoke in hushed tones of fault and power and fear, but it was all tempered by a strange relief, a sort of subdued reassurance in the very act of blaming. It was less frightening for them to assign responsibility to something solid, someone on whom justice could be brought, rather than to accept that some things simply happen. A storm can be crueler than any man and yet you cannot hold it morally responsible. To make a man a storm… he may become a god in the public eye, but even gods can fall. And so every crisis was another black mark against the bogeyman they had created, a soul imagined to hold all sourceless sins, a nebulous being damned to eternal offense. The people were placated by their attributions, but they had no sense of their own responsibility… for myths and legends eventually gain strange lives of their own, and what then, if their child of guilt were to gain awareness of the injustice against it? What then, if their scapegoat proclaimed itself a lamb? Could the people learn to see a different hand dealing, a different hand dealt?


prismaticbleed: (Default)

fatigue


Twilight, deep and heavy as the ocean, collapsed upon the barren land. A lone violet shadow rippled across waves of stone, parched white monuments that had not tasted rain in years.
Tiny pinpoints of blood marked his footprints like dying stars as his eyes desperately swept the heavens for familiar constellations. He found nothing but blue-- terrible, gasping depths of blue, flooding his eyes and lungs with smoke-thick shade.
The only spark of life for miles trudged on through the suffocating night. He imagined the thick clouds cracking open, pouring sweet light and water down upon his dusty face, but the air was silent as a tomb.
Morning would come again, eventually.
Another step. Another. Once more...
The landscape of bone shimmered wet with rubies.

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flailing

2AM. A dying yellow cathode buzzed above my head. The sick light slid down into the grimy bathroom mirror and sputtered backwards to catch in my hair like spiderwebs, painting my skin the color of last week’s obituaries.
I stood perfectly still. The mirror couldn’t see what my hands gripped desperately, shaking and white-knuckled, below the rim of the cracked ceramic sink, and although I would never admit it I was glad to not see it staring back at me.
My heart was flailing like a dying insect. I mentally told it to shut up, to stop making me sicker than I already was, but its frantic throes persisted.
The buzzing light was swallowing even the silence. It felt as if time had keeled over sideways. What was my name again? Did it even matter?
Cold metal shivered between my fingers. I closed my eyes.

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grasped


Reams of paper crashed onto the floor in sun-bleached waves as I struggled to swim through the thoughts that roared around me. A burble of strangled speech reached my ears but I was preoccupied with clutching my sandbar of a pen, praying that I could pull myself to shore. But the tide, the unrelenting tide, swept over my shaking hands and spilled incomprehensibly onto the shore, leaving great black stains that threatened to swallow what little I had left to hold on to.
The pen slipped from my fingers and I dived madly at it, choking on the saltwater that had suddenly slammed into my lungs, when I was suddenly yanked from the waves and tossed onto warm sand. I looked up, dazed, and met eyes like seashells.
“Why must you always overwhelm yourself with work like this?”
I wiped the ink from my shivering hands.
“It’s either that or drown.”

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returned

Seven days have passed since that fateful moment, seven aeon-long days, and my bones still ache with echoes of a lifetime scratched and forgotten.
True, those eternal hours had given me a new life, but they had first ended another, and the truth was that I had planned to die with it. Yet I had been snatched from the tar-blackened fingers of oblivion by aged hands touched with gold, begging me to breathe, to live. I had demanded that he let go, to let me fall into nothingness, but he refused, insisting that I understood neither the repercussions of what I had just wrought, nor the consequences that would splinter from my planned clockwork suicide. He insisted, in a voice painted silver, that I return.
I had sand in my eyes, snow in my hair, blood on my shirt. Time hung ragged and broken before me like a record snapped in two, like a velvet curtain tossed into a fireplace, dripping red notes that pooled around my bruised feet.
But I took his hand, and his smile shone with the promise of a future.

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bagel

“So I just learned that, I’ve got this extended cousin I never knew about, an’ everyone calls him “Bagel.” She laughed, running tiny candlestick fingers through her cotton candy hair, flashing a silver-studded smile. “An’ I said, if his name really is “Bagel,” why the hell haven’t we been introduced yet? Gotta be an interesting guy with a name like that.” She giggled again, like a kid at a birthday party, and shifted her perpetually shoeless legs. “Seriously! Who names their kid after breakfast food?”

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prismaticbleed: (Default)


bland

The room was the color of a sugarless milkshake, one that had sat out in the sun too long. In the stark light pouring from its single window, a cream-skinned girl fidgeted as the lurid glare soured her complexion. She ran her hands across the papery folds of her dress, longing for texture, for color. It was all so bland, so vapid. She licked her lips and tried to remember what sweetness tasted like.

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sparkling

I looked up, surprised, as the sound of the radio swiftly degenerated into a rushing hum, like an electronic riverbank on a crystal shore. Sure enough, he hovered there before me, eyes wondering but unaware, the firefly-bright motes around his head clear as ever. I sighed and flicked the radio off, feeling static jump to my fingers as the sound finally died. “You really have to stop showing up when I’m trying to hear the news,” I told him, meeting his questioning gaze with dry amusement. It wasn’t his fault. How was he supposed to know that radio waves didn’t take well to sparkling specters?

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conceal

“I’m tellin’ you Dave,” Joe whispered loudly between the two desks, “Miss Gheram’s got an eye on the back of her head!”
“Don’t you mean she’s got ‘eyes?’” Dave replied, unfazed.
Joe shook his head. “No no no, she’s just got one, like a cyclops. Right in the back. She’s got all that big hair to– to conceal it,” he concluded with emphasis.
“Stop using big words, Joe.”
“Conceal isn’t a big word! It means she hides it!”
“Whatever. I still wanna see this eye.”
Outside the classroom door, Molly Gheram made a mental note to start buying hats.

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bench

A sterling-haired man sauntered into the park, humming tunelessly, and sat down on a faded bench by the old willow tree. The wood creaked as if to greet an old friend.
“Lovely day, isn’t it?”
He turned and spoke to no one in particular, carefully shaking the jacket from his thin shoulders. Something like dust spilled from its faded folds, distracting the butterflies in the air. Sunlight glinted through the particles.
“It’s a little too warm for this. Would you mind?”
There was no objection as he held out the coat, summer winds swirling voicelessly about him. For a moment it seemed as if the man had forgotten that he was alone, his arms held out expectantly, his eyes bright.
Then his hands were as empty as the seat beside him, and he smiled.

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accordion

Accordions are ridiculous. That was an axiom I refused to reconsider, soldered into place from a childhood tainted by bad polka music. But that was self-evident, too. You couldn’t make that instrument sound tuneful if you tried.
These are the thoughts I entertained from the city sidewalk, before I was stopped in my tracks by the bellows of that same irksome contraption. It was impossible, I protested, but there he was, idling at the junction of Washington and Main, an infernal squeezebox between his liver-spotted hands.
I was vexed. Who plays an accordion on a street corner? Even worse, who plays an accordion where I can hear it? It was offensive, and I strongly considered letting the old man know, when my bitter glare caught sight of his fingers.
It was… astounding. For a moment my thoughts were silenced by the deft motions of his hands, dancing over the tiny keys with unexpected grace. For a moment I was transfixed, and in spite of my youthful enmity I found myself feeling genuine admiration for not only the man, but also for the accordion– the accordion!– as its lilting melody sang warmly in the smog-bitten air.
That’s when I realized the air was now quiet, the instrument still, kind eyes fixed on my face. I coughed, feeling sheepish, and tossed a tenner into his hat as I slid away.
His grateful thank-you reached my reddened ears without affront and I couldn’t help but smile.
Look who's talking, old man.
I guess accordions weren’t so stupid after all.

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hinge

The hinges of his jaw creaked as he grinned, his sallow skin twisting into that same dead expression my nightmares loved to remind me of. A row of unnaturally gray teeth glinted from between his wooden lips, shining like frog eggs. I shivered.
“What’s the matter?” Even his speech sounded like rusty nails. “Afraid of dolls?”
Yeah, I thought, swallowing hard. Yeah I’m afraid of dolls, no thanks to you.
Beady eyes glinted back at me in the dark, all-seeing, more aware than I dared contemplate. He didn’t stop smiling.

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racket

His feet slammed into the bronze-slick floor as he ran, breath quick with hopes and terrors, through the clamorous house of bells.
He had an absurd mental image of a box of fireworks, dropped into the middle of a pantry, sending pots and pans screaming in blinding flares of red and gold. The thought faded quickly, however– no thoughts could survive in this racket.
It was unbearable. His ribcage was vibrating, his teeth jarring together with every resonating clang. He was trapped in an absolute disaster of sound.

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switching

The colors of his irises were switching rapidly, like schizophrenic christmas lights. Brown, green, blue, gray… now deep black, now albino pink. His eyelids fluttered in time to their shifting hues.
From across the subway aisle, a girl in a knitted scarf watched intently. His pupils were wide and hazy, and seemed to be gazing straight through her into another realm. But she stared into them from across the subway aisle, just as ignorant to the din around her as he was.
Whatever realm he was viewing, she mused, it was reflected in his eyes.

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brief

Living in this blighted world was hell, he thought. On every street corner there was death, despair, devastation. Families he had known in his youth were rapidly fading from the earth, swallowed up by the insatiable maw of the plague.
Raven-dark death danced about his footsteps, jeering at his face, so like its own. He couldn’t get the stench out of his lungs.
And this child, this poor child, couldn’t get the oozing tar out of his body.
The plague doctor readjusted his ornithic mask, the scent of lavender and clove reminding him of better days, when he didn’t have to watch innocent children bleed.
“Let’s make this brief,” he rasped, and prayed that it would be true.

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straw

I looked up from the daily news at the sudden sound of jingling, a cheery metallic twinkle that cut through the din like a shooting star. I was surprised to find it radiating from the keychain-weighted hips of a young woman, bouncing on her heels as she swirled past my table.
For a moment I simply stared, caught off guard by this sudden burst of color. Striped tights, slim figure, wearing more pink than a rose garden in June… geez, she looked like something you’d drink a strawberry milkshake through. Even that swirl of vanilla-colored hair looked unusually perfect, and that’s from a guy who prefers brunettes. She was cute. Like a cupcake, I decided, and stifled a laugh.
That got her attention. The keychains jingled sharply then, and two ice-blue eyes (look at the size of those lashes!) focused on my own. The gaze she shot at me was strikingly incongruous with her cheery getup, and accusatory enough to summon a twinge of guilt. I cleared my throat, suddenly all too aware of my dress shirt and slacks.
“S’cute,” was all I said, nodding politely at her soda-straw figure.
For a second she looked at me like I was on a sugar high, then simply twirled on her feet and continued on her way, bright as a cherry against the monotonous crowd.
A moment later I put down the newspaper and decided to buy myself a milkshake.

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cathedral

Melancholy rainbows danced across the crystal floors of the Cathedral, great streaks of ethereal blood spilled by the moon. The Prince tread across them like a war hero, proud of the fallen spectrums splashing across his gold-rimmed feet.
This was his stronghold, his sanctuary: a house of worship dedicated to his own name. He was the angel that watched over it, and he was the deity that walked within it. In this hall of mirrors, he was everything; limitless, transcendent, omnipresent.
He paused, his pale face awash with color, at the largest stained glass window, where an elegantly twisted image of his father beamed down upon him. Devotion blazed to life in his chest, filling his amber-blue eyes with sparks.
I will make you proud, the gilded Prince promised wordlessly, ignorant of the creeping shadows beneath the bleeding light. I promise. I will become the god you created me to be.

Behind him, the devil waited with infinite patience, a single splinter of color scarring his darkened face. Soon the kingdom of light would fall, and his hands would have cut the first throat.
He did not smile as he swept forwards, the void about him reaching out to swallow his prey. This death would be just, he swore; this blasphemous act would be a secret saving grace.
For the devil knew, as the Prince turned to him in fear, that an illegitimate Son was no savior at all.

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chills

The glass of shocking-pink liquid spun once, like a soporific lunatic, before fatally crashing to the floor. Simultaneously, a moonlight-colored figure collapsed to his knees, staining them with technicolor liquid. His arms and legs were screaming mutely now, shivering up and down with nauseating chills that he unfortunately recognized all too well. He bit his lip, cursing his own optimism. Roseate refreshments were never safe, no matter how intoxicatingly they shimmered. Yet here he was again, crumpled on the unfeeling marble, his entire nervous system a frozen mess of crushed glass.
He fumbled for the edge of the counter, fingers numb to the icy smoothness above his head, and tried to stand, but his feet were floating and he succeeded only in soaking his silver sleeves as well as they took the brunt of his fall.
By now his body was too shocked to move any more, and his consciousness was quickly dissolving into that nightmarish static void. But even now, he could hear candy-pink heels echoing from the adjacent hallway, tapping out his fate in morse code.
God damn it, the snow king swore, as shooting stars swallowed his world alive.

----------------------------------------------

trap

The evening sky glimmered far above, bruised violet and starlit red, wrapped tightly with fishing-line threads of cloud. He thought it looked like a dying god; some great, magnificent thing, bleeding to death in the twilight of the world.
Kind of like me, was his next thought, as he weakly shrugged a pair of bony shoulders. The wires pulled tighter in response, scattering another layer of bloodied scales to the dirt floor. They lay in a pitiful mosaic around his feet, glittering like dying stars.
He did not look at them. He was trying not to show the pain that seared along his freakish spine, burying itself between his temples like a parasite.
Still, a being like him could bear the pain, the solitude, the shadows. The humiliation of being trapped was but a splinter. Yes, it would have been useless to keep him here, bound in the bowels of the earth, under any other circumstances.
But his eyes were locked on the wounded sky.
This, indeed, was the cruelest torture.
His shoulders moved again, in the memory of stolen wings, and the wires cut deeper.

----------------------------------------------

camera

I’d often wondered what I would sacrifice, just to experience immortality at her hands. She was a goddess of creation, terrible and wonderful; she was a sunbeam, turning the dust of the world into gold, and everything she gazed upon was transformed.
She made it look so simple, so elegant… but I knew better. I had tried to imitate her magic once and the beauty had nearly killed me.
And yet I knew, with absolute certainty, that she could take my broken bones and weave them into a masterpiece.
It would only take a moment, and my soul would be forever illuminated.
A smile turned the corners of her mouth ever so lightly, and she raised her camera once more, preparing to bring beauty into the world anew.

----------------------------------------------

secret


A few seagulls careened past my window, casting fluttering shadows across my perpetually catastrophic work desk. I sat alone on my bedsheets, rumpled from another restless nights sleep, and listened intently. I wasn't quite sure why I was suddenly struck by the typical silence surrounding my life, as I usually put great effort into shifting my attention away from it. Still, I guess you can only go so long before the understated gravity of such things broadsides you.
The sudden sound of birdwings was oddly comforting in light of those resurfacing thoughts, reminding me that benevolent life still existed outside of this lonely place I called home... outside and close enough to touch, which was more than I could say for the few other lives I treasured. I was at least close enough for the birds to seek solace in. As for my source of hope, well...
I let out a sigh, trying to sound nonchalant about it, but the sudden ache in my ribs spited me, too sharp and real to stay hidden in there. For a moment I frustratedly considered running to the window and telling those damn seagulls about it, but that would've been criminally uncool. True, the puppets scattered around my lonely room had heard about this a hundred times before, but I didn't feel like repeating myself, even for the sake of alleviating this recurring melancholy.
See, shouting into the void wasn't an issue. The ocean depths beyond these four walls couldn't respond, and didn't seem to care all that much anyway. The real problem was that I stored my secrets in my fingertips, and maybe I was secretly too used to this silence to risk forever shattering it, even if I'd never admit that, not even to the gulls.
The problem was that you can only live under such pressure for so long, and I knew that my heart had already started to crack.
What irony.
Sometimes it really sucked to be the last man on earth.

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event

It was one in the morning, and yet time had ceased to exist.
True, the reality of space still lingered within my worn-out bones, but even that was tenuous now, slipping away in the morning hours like blood into a drain.
My eyelids fluttered under the weight of exhaustion, adamant in their refusal to welcome sleep. I had been surviving as a mote in the threads of society for the past twelve hours– an eternity now, a tick of the dying second-hand now– and I had no intention of escaping this transient state of being. This freedom from existence itself was all that mattered.
The sparse few souls around me slept, sprawled out across hard carpets, collapsing into unfeeling chairs. I sat alone beneath a symphonic fractal and breathed, forgetting what it was like to be somebody, and smiled.
Time had ceased to exist, and so had I.
And within that impossible cosmic event, I was infinite.

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comfort

I was told that there would be blood; there would be tears, and sweat, and disaster beyond knowing. I was assured of our total failure, of catastrophe, of defeat.
I did not doubt this, when I saw the blade pressed against your throat, burning cold with inexorable sacrifice. I did not question this, as you screamed into the unfeeling night with an anguish no mortal soul could fathom.
I prayed for sleep as the shadows danced about my feet, dripping tar-pink fever dreams and bile. You never tired as you pursued them, hands stained dark beneath old bandages and scars, every last thread seared with bitter fury.
The years dragged on, and we followed suit, white and red and violet rage beneath a sunless sky. Our death had been guaranteed, but in spite of eternity, an impossible life dripped from my arms, leaving breadcrumb hopes in the soulless dust. You watched them wordlessly, as great black stains crept across your body, hidden by the void pulled tight about your shoulders.
It was a strange comfort, to know that I could gaze unafraid into your blazing eyes.
Whatever wars we may still have to fight, whatever wounds we will wear anew, whatever anguish and horror must come, in this anomalous life of ours... if only you remain by my side, I shall never despair. 

----------------------------------------------

half

Something was wrong.
Those three words, unsettling as they were, could never describe the way his very presence sent spasms of dread through my veins. And yet there he was, sitting across the room from me even now, sepulchral eyes staring into an inner world no one else could perceive. I wondered if he even knew I was there.
He was indisputably, irreparably divided, that was evident. Not conflicted, disorganized, or alienated, although those were indeed true as well: no, he was split in half to a depth I could not fathom. His heart had been dimidiated, and he had been left with nothing but sinister scars, memories of wounds suffered for the sake of a love not forgotten, but denied in agony.
The algorithms of his existence were all wrong, I decided. No matter how many times his shattered mind was plugged into the system, an answer could not be found. There were no solutions to his madness, only a sole hope of restoration, the impossible dream of a long-dead counterpart and the ashes of tortured faith.
He stared on, seeing nothing. It was all he had left.

----------------------------------------------

begin


I stood at the threshold of the Cathedral and watched in serene silence as tar-blade shadows wound about my feet. I did not resist, nor would I fight back when its imminent onslaught crashed into my bones. Its seething rage sunk metaphorical teeth into my veins but I stood fast, ignoring my trembling hands. I had survived our first encounter, had I not?
Two months had passed since then and my blood still beat within these walls, silent but strong, deep red within white, an invincible truth that this tainted shade could never defile. This atrium had not ruptured, despite the scars that lined my arms… indeed, it was only by virtue of their agony that I could now breathe, clear and faithful, in the shadow of death itself. Its devotion to my ruin had instead brought about a rebirth… a miracle manifested in the small child now entering the Cathedral behind me.
The tar rose up then, frenzied and screaming, utter destruction its only thought, but its loss was already guaranteed. In that moment, as the first blow rushed towards me, I knew that we could not lose. No one would die here tonight, not in this holy twilight. This was our atonement; we would not be forsaken.
And now, it was time to begin…

----------------------------------------------

determined

Flashes of red and pink were dancing in the corners of her eyes, filling her with a strange and impossible hope. For too long, she had simply stood and watched like this. How many years had she spent, praying and wishing and trying until her bones ached, looking to the skies for an answer? But now that the moment was here, was it worth taking a chance? Or was she really going to spend another lifetime waiting?
No… she refused to wait any longer. If there were going to be any miracles today, they would be wrought by her hands, clenched in determined fists.
I do belong here, she told herself. I am worth something. I can do this.
And this time, as diamonds sparked to life within her, she believed it.

----------------------------------------------


prismaticbleed: (held)

route


“Man, you really took the scenic route there,” Laurie laughed aloud.
It was 3 in the morning, the first day of the new year. I had ventured out into this forest around 11PM the night before, and… well, let’s just say I thought we would have been out sooner. I embarrassedly smiled at this as my superego continued loudly, gesturing incredulously at the icy landscape around us. “We’re, what, four hours out of the way?”
“It was worth it, though,” I replied simply. “Four hours doesn’t seem like a lot in the grand scheme of things, but… well, those were a pretty awesome four hours.”
“You said it,” the violet shade grinned, as we kept walking. “Just… let’s be a little more direct next time, all right? You do need sleep.”
I couldn’t help but smile back as the snow fell, and turned back onto the main road.

----------------------------------------------

notice

Dear God, he's my best friend. I can't do this.
No one heard my thoughts over the suffocating silence. I was terrified, more aware of my fragile mortality than I had ever been.
The moments were ticking away like a time bomb, each unforgiving second dragging me a step closer to death; but it was either mine or his, and if I had to die to keep him alive, then so be it.
No one noticed me hesitate. No one noticed the pain in my eyes.
I turned around and my fate was sealed.

----------------------------------------------

discover


Mankind was not born for this. We were not meant to laze away our lives in two-story houses, with a dog and a spouse and a 9-to-5 job. We delude ourselves into thinking that this false ideal born from society is all there is. We grow old and we are too busy mourning the ephemerality of life to appreciate the beauty of it. We put on a different mask every morning, but repeat the same actions, day in and day out. Yet in the end, we all stare up at the stars at night, our souls aching for that final frontier, seeking the only true magic in this world… discovery. There is so much more to life than this.

----------------------------------------------

perfectly

I don’t like using the word ‘perfect.’ Personal reasons. Yet, it seems that the world’s perception of perfection is quite flawed. My life is far from the ideal most expect it to be, and frankly, it’s far from what I’d like it to be as well… but then I stop and think. Would it truly be better that way? I have suffered, yes. I have seen and felt and known things that I would give almost anything not to have experienced. Yet despite all of the blood and bones and broken hearts, everything seems to be working out… perfectly. Life’s a funny thing.

----------------------------------------------

perfectly, take two

“This is FAR from perfect,” she spat, violet eyes lingering on my scars. “You don’t deserve this. No one deserves to suffer through this sort of living nightmare every day of their lives. Yeah, I know you believe in justice and all of that but come on! You haven’t done a damn thing to deserve what she does to you!”
“Yes I have.”
“Don’t give me that; I know you better than you know yourself, kid. Bottom line, this is far from perfect, and I refuse to put up with it any longer. You shouldn’t either.”
I looked up at her then.
“Maybe that really is the better perspective…”

----------------------------------------------

ragged

His shadow was as ragged as the edges of his thoughts, and he moved with the grace of a falling star. I must admit I was fascinated by his paradoxical beauty, by the dark gold hum of his eyes, by the way his voice caught like a wave breaking in the night.
There were secrets hidden in the spaces between his fingers and I spent far too many aching moments wishing I could feel them, that I might know even the smallest fragment of the days he had lived as an ephemeral specter upon the earth.
But the years are cruel to us all, and I knew we both still bled the same.

----------------------------------------------

truth

I just realized that everything I’ve written here is taken directly from my life or from those of people very close to me.

I’ve never been able to write about ’whatever comes to mind’ without simply elaborating on what is, without simply giving gilded glory to existing experiences. Every word I type has a deeper meaning, and a purpose far beyond the fleeting gazes of restless eyes.

When I write, I write in truth.

----------------------------------------------

blotches

The city was an insomniac, its streets roaring in razorbright hysteria.
A lone shadow turned his tricolor eyes to the miasmatic sky, burned an infectious orange from years of abuse. I haven't seen the moon in years, he thought disjointedly, his lungs heavy with smog.
Thick lines of neon blood poured down from the man's hairline, leaving unearthly blotches that glowed against his chest. He shuddered slightly, the unforgiving masses paying no heed, as a roll of static crashed beneath his collarbone.

----------------------------------------------

drain


“I’ve become voiceless,” I confessed. “Every day, I try to communicate, but nothing comes out right. I feel as if I were mute, for what it’s worth. I’ve been drained of all the words I used to have.”
The creature beside me said nothing at first, and I felt a sudden terror that he had lost his speech as well before he took my hands in his.
“Then find a new way to speak.”

----------------------------------------------

chocolate

It was a cold Valentine’s day evening, and although I wasn’t as alone as I looked, the dim silence of my footsteps still caused my head to ache. All I wanted was for someone here to accept me, for the 21st year in a row. That can’t be too much to ask. How much love had I given so far? To how many individuals had I offered my heart? Yet as the second week of February lilted in on pink-edged wings, once again it could only shake its head at me, as if in apology. I suppose that in todays world, when having to choose between superficiality or sincerity, too many people pick the chocolates.

----------------------------------------------

flare

The woman drew the cigarette away from her lips, its tiny red flare burning a distress signal into the darkening twilight, and exhaled a thick curtain of smog. Her left hand was locked around a bottle of beer, fingers anxiously tapping against the cold glass. He was late, just as the others had been, and she had given up. Maybe its better this way, she thought bitterly, taking another vengeful gulp of alcohol. I’m not ready for love. But even as the numbing fire crawled up through her ribs, she knew it was a lie.

----------------------------------------------


prismaticbleed: (Default)

 

rejection

"This isn't what we're looking for," as the paper slid back across the table.
The shadow of a hand covered my face. Cold. Didn't you want to see me? After the countless hours you spent with your eyes fixed on mine, couldn't you bear to look at me?
If I'm not what you were looking for, if I truly have no use, what will become of me?
Was I born only to die?
Was I created only to be rejected?

----------------------------------------------

paperclips

I held the tiny, twisted metal shape between my fingers.
One paper clip. That’s all it took to hold my life together.
My hands moved to pick up a stack of papers, drowning in letters and punctuation, overflowing with ideas and thoughts. Ten years of writing. Ten years of purpose.
I slipped the paper clip over the left corner and smiled.
Funny how the things we take for granted are often the things we need the most.


“Look at them,” I implored, holding my hands up to him. Colors fell from my fingers. Red, yellow, white, green. “Look at how many there are.”
He smiled at me, intrigued and amused, as I scrambled to collect the ones I had dropped. “Sure, but why do you need so many paper clips?”
I grinned in reply as I turned back to my work. “I ran out of staples.”

----------------------------------------------

alter

I stood in silence, taken by surprise. He had stopped speaking mid-sentence, and was now gazing blindly at the pavement. Was he feeling sick?
“Hey, what’s up? Can you hear me?” I asked, waving a hand before his glassy eyes. No response. I sighed, shifting on my feet indecisively, and tried again. “Listen, I just want to help. What’s going on? Are you feeling okay?”
The man’s head snapped back up then, a grin bursting onto the grey countenance like a silent gunshot. I flinched.
“Okay? I’m just peachy,” a voice quite unlike his laughed, shaking hands reaching up to run through matted brown hair. “Just fuckin’ peachy.”
My breath caught in my throat, and I took a step back. This is not okay after all, I thought, feeling my nerves tense and sting. This is not okay at all. I was speaking to an alter.
The stranger’s grin had not faded. The air was thick with gunpowder.

----------------------------------------------

obvious

“You should have realized it by now,” the violet-eyed specter sighed from across the room. “It’s obvious that she’s only trying to harm you. I don’t care how well she tries to hide her real motives. You should have realized it by now, for the love of God!”
I said nothing, my arms wrapped tightly across my aching ribs. I was miserable for the third day in a row and it was all because I was far too naive. Second chances lose their light when they are given to devils, I mused as another dagger of pain sliced through my chest. Why do I never learn?

----------------------------------------------

mythology

As a child, my head was full of dragons and unicorns, old gods and old magic, knights and wizards and immortal heroes. I was fascinated by mythology: the stories laced their fingers through the spaces in reality and molded them into a gilded fascination. Then I grew older, and legends were swallowed up by logic, science and hard facts pervading the corners of my mind where the phoenixes hid.
Have we destroyed that old world? Are the minds of children its only hope?

----------------------------------------------

lucky

You’re so lucky, my mother has always told me. You’ve always been lucky. But is there really any such thing as luck? Are there any real coincidences? Or is it all fate, some invisible plan, the myriad blessings all lining up to serve a greater purpose? No, I say; I am not a lucky man. I am something more.

----------------------------------------------

tarnished

The hot water jets were at full blast, my aching fingers thrust into the boiling stream. I cringed at the futility of it all, reflexively drawing back as the pain seared through my bones once more. What did I hope to burn away? What did I hope to erase? I could scrub this skin until it bled. I could slice clean through to the bone. I could cauterize every nerve this cursed form possessed, and it would still fail to remove the stains. My very soul was tarnished, I thought, biting my lip against the pain. Still, I could at least hope. I turned off the water and picked up the knife.

----------------------------------------------

wishing

Wishing, hoping, praying… it was all I could remember doing. How long had I been fighting this harsh reality? I stared in the mirror, coldly observing my stolen body, as I did every night. It was not mine; it had never been mine, and I despised every inch of it. Even now my consciousness burned at the awareness of these loathsome bones. There would be no shooting stars tonight, I thought bitterly.

 

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