the spectrum heart cathedral system

On Tuesday night?
Um... I had another fragment hack, which was really horrible and had me dizzyingly sick for hours afterwards. But what shocked me was that when I was trying to recover immediately afterwards, Julie showed up-- Julie!!-- and screamed at me for 'letting myself fall for that again.' I asked her what in the world she was talking about, wasn't she working with the splinters? But she said no, they had apparently been using her for selfish ends too, and she didn't want anything to do with them.
Then she told me she was done with hacking me. After 5 years of hell, she told me that I won. I had 'ruined' hacking for her-- with all the sacrifices I had made in trying to stop her, I had ACTUALLY succeeded, and she said that hacking me just wasn't worth it as she no longer got anything from it. She told me that letting my ego splinter hack me was only getting her in trouble, and she was sick of being blamed for it now that she wasn't involved.
Well I was shocked. I asked her what she was going to do and she said she didn't know. She was livid, still yelling at me for 'stealing her color' and destroying all her old hacking methods, but she was tired too. She said she didn't want to die, but being an id/shadow, she was losing her strength.
I asked Julie then if she had really meant it in the past, when she offered to try and change her ways. She said no, she only wanted to survive and playing along/ lying was just another way of getting what she wanted. That was no longer an option for her though because I was no longer fooled.
I told her she still had an option, that I would give her another chance if she cleaned up her act and changed her ways for good. After all, if she could no longer hack me and so had lost her main survival method, then she WOULD die eventually because I wasn't letting her use me anymore for strength. So if she wanted to live, she had to change.
Julie then spat that 'changing was dying,' as she was a shadow, so she couldn't live if she tried to change. I told her that maybe she only had to die to her old self? She could keep living, but she could no longer live for selfish reasons. She actually appeared to consider this for a second but then shook her head.
I knew she was only looking for ways to prolong her existence at that point, by any means necessary. She wasn't interested in bettering herself. But I knew that we had never hit this point before, and I was going to try.
I let her alone then, and filled Laurie and Chaos in on the new development. They were absolutely stunned and Laurie was freaking out at first, telling me not to jump into this or put myself in danger again, but I promised I would be careful and I wouldn't let Julie near anyone else.
The next day I tried to work with Julie one-on-one, trying to get her to be a little more respectful and less egotistic, but she kept trying to trigger me and abuse me. I called her out on it and said flat-out that I wouldn't stand for it. I told her that I was giving her one last chance, and she could take it if she wanted, but if she refused and went back to being a force of sheer negativity, I couldn't promise her survival. After all, I was changing and my life was changing, and she could no longer live as she had used to. That made her stay quiet for a while, but I couldn't work with her after that so I had to leave.
I didn't talk to her yesterday and I didn't yet today, but I'm going to try, so no one slacks off.
I am just absolutely floored by how huge of a development this potentially is in my inner life.