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[prismaticbleed]

 
THREE failed mass livestreams
The one we finally got was PERFECT
https://www.youtube.com/live/t7wy-QIZ4hg?si=v6BJNB2JxnoCWbxA

...

Apatefoni on Godphone
"I wish the System was gone. I just want to focus on You"
"Remember how bad things were for you the last time you asked for that"

"I don't want to have to worry about their lives. They're not real."
"They're part of your soul. So are you part of theirs. You exist together."
"I just want to be alone with You"
"And what will you do when you're called out into the world? What if i ask you to get your elbows dirty? Will you refuse and run back to your altar? That isn't serving Me in truth."
"...They aren't serving you!!"
"They practice mercy & forgiveness, which you don't."

"You don't want the burden of their lives" "without them, your religion is selfish"

"Why do you want them to go away?"
"For love of You"
"But is it also for hatred of them?"
"..."
"The two cannot coexist as motives, my dear child"


Bible study note in light of that^
"...the pain of a few was permitted for the benefit of the whole Church."
I reiterate this. YOUR LIFE IS NOT ABOUT YOU. IT'S ABOUT EVERYONE. AND THAT INCLUDES YOU!!!!
IT'S NOT A CALLOUS EITHER-OR DIVISION. IT'S A COMPASSIONATE BOTH-AND UNITY.
Your life is a GIFT to begin with.

Thriskefoni switching got us SO DARKLY DEPRESSED that a "demiJewel" (similar era roots, internal anchor, but no League function) suddenly switched in at the kitchen PURPOSELY to eat the cereal "because we're stressed"??????
Xenophon, Laurie, and Jay talked her out of it BUT cooperatively-- she's fully open to reason.
STILL anxious though & someone else started portioning carrots??? Lynne took over & held stable.
We all began to talk during the mechanical activity to prevent dangerous dissociation. Somehow the MASSACRE was mentioned??
Laurie OBVIOUSLY SHELLSHOCKED as she talked notably around it. That was shocking and agonizing to see. She's traumatized by it. I don't think we considered she COULD be, with her brutal function. But that's why CNC killed her-- she was assumed invincible, and it ironically destroyed her.
I remember her saying specifically how Cannon walked in "with a railgun strapped to her arm"
I think that's actually how we got into this subject. Cannon was then just working mercenary for JESSICA, whose motives are way too close to those of Christina & Tatiana, albeit far more hideously apparent. The thriskefoni are worse in their hypocrisy-- they want you dead, but they'll keep their own hands spotless; and when they do bring about your utter annihilation, it will be with a pretty plasticine smile.
...
Jay fronting then, joyfully mentioned Christmas coming, then bluntly yet gracefully shifted RIGHT into the massacre topic, consoling Laurie and telling her that her actions on that terrible night "proved the depth of her love for us" more than even he could have imagined.
I know we also mentioned how Cannon has since begun dealing with her darkness and, like Razor, is no longer a homicide threat.

Rather compulsively requested 4 more DVDs from the library.
...

Bible study = Mimic suddenly noticing a parallel between the Harrowing of Hell & Psalm 139


...I want to make a subversive comic-image? Comparing the lgbtq+ "explore your sexuality" to "colonizing" violence, on earth AND in space. Because it is.
"I'm not land to be explored." "I am not your mountain to climb, just to plant your triumphant flag upon." "I am not just another part of your empire." Parallel actual terms. Use Metaphors to call out misdemeanor.
EMPHASIZE COMMITMENT & FIDELITY & RESPECT.
NO PROMISCUITY. NO SLEEPING AROUND.


Noise next door made us realize =
WE STILL GET PANIC ATTACKS WHEN WE HEAR THE SKYPE PHONECALL RINGTONE.
...that's very saddening. Fifteen entire years later we STILL are triggered by those memories and WE DON'T KNOW WHY.
We have no idea who was driving before Cannon showed up.
...


"What is perfection in love? Love your enemies in such a way that you would desire to make them your brothers ... For so did He love, Who hanging on the Cross, said 'Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.' (Luke 23:34)"
- St. Augustine