audio notes
Jun. 19th, 2015 12:25 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
prismaticbleed(from deleted tracks on morpheus)
track 10= "the whole idea of stabilizing into spectrum slots is huge, especially with central, but spine says "you also have to wake up into Leagueworlds too." kind of like how she woke up to her role in Parnassus before, we thought she was vermilion in central. she was iffy for a while, we should go back and look through her entire past because of that. but she said awakening into league worlds is big too.
also. in terms of socials/ negative alters/ etc., once they are aware of their role, they no longer bleed over into other people. the one girl who feels like "jessica" and might be the original depressed one, she has a fear that she's the original and she will sabotage everyone else's efforts, "they're not real," etc.
when she's aware of herself doing that, suddenly she no longer bleeds into anyone else and freezes up to actually exist.
also when she is tangibly aware of being a PART of the system, she stops hurting us because "I'm not the only one, I'm not the original," she will stop and rest???
track 17= "also. black light machine is an instant existential validation song. it's like, when it starts playing, life feels like a movie, in a real "life is alive, there is a plot to our lives" sort of sense. and its brings us into full awareness. frost* has that kind of power for some reason. not sure who was around in 2009 at the time we discovered them. but don't get trapped in the past. it might be an evolved thing. point is, it's relevant now and it is hugely important. it's like a universal grounding/ anchoring/ alive thing for our system. bottom line, frost* is important."
track 19= "it seems that every summer, thanks to the heat that mimics severe selfabusive situations, maybe that's part of why we can't remember anything from slc, because the heat was so bad we just had shutdown dissociaton all the time.
see if during the summer we can access any memories of that time.
this is terrible; it's so hard to cope with this heat. we're thinking of hiding out in the cold stone basement at this point. the heat is so encroaching and smothering… for some reason it feels like abuse. it is so scary. I am fighting to not black out while driving.
we're needing to let out manic fronters just to calm down because the rest of us can't manage this fear and agitation.
so be careful, we'll probably find a lot of hidden memories during the summer."
old track 21= three main abusive methods are:
BLOOD = RED
SEX = CERISE
FOOD = BROWN
(cerise used to bleed into pink)
and the three main motivations are
GRAY = KNOWLEDGE
BLACK = HATRED
WHITE = APATHY
all this plays together!!
BE CAREFUL! pay attention when hacks happen, we need to find out WHY this stuff is in those colors, and GET IT OUT.
see if there are any correspondences "across" on the system? like how aqua is across from gray. but they could not get cz because he has something in his light brighter than any of that.
also upsetting, why is there SO MUCH NEGATIVITY all on that ONE SIDE of the spectrum?? there should not be negativity in colors at all!
find virtue/vice correspondences for all colors if that applies.
we HAVE to tie back into our personal symbolism again.
the body is horribly sick after a triple-aspect hack attempt this morning. don't overanalyze it because that just brings you into gray. we have to be full of COLOR and LIGHT to heal.
THAT is our "normal." we have to be the light. we can't let anything chase us away anymore. we have to stand strong no matter what it takes.
be very careful, be loving, be forgiving. I know its summer but we can make it through.
it only feels frightening because there is stuff we need to face and heal.
but we're doing well. we'll be all right. we can't be defeated, god/light can't be defeated, and that's what's in our heart. don't worry, we'll get through this.
"color redemption is in the color. retributors are a prime example"
note for may 3= "Emmett was out, so he's okay. at the store there was a lot of talking with spice. write that down, because people are coming through very strongly. we got blueshift to work, so not only did we get all the old league stuff out, but we were able to go through the old pictures folder, and we got a rough timeline for when glissando was out. spinzor is still alive; mention that different voices come out in the winter/summer because it's different environments/ contexts/ triggers/ etc that they can survive. spinzor still thinks its summer 2009, we shold be at marywood and hanging out in the coffee shop. that's actually a good way of surviving= locking yourself in the café for 6 hours and just typing. yesterday we found out a lot of info about old cores. differences between cores/ hosts/ social fronters, some pass themselves off as other things; we used to assume a lot of social fronters were cores and they're not. cores hold the JEWEL bloodline, they can survive WITHOUT headspace. "the" core is allegedly the one who's about 12? we don’t know. no one from childhood. spinzor kind of counts in this bloodline. the jayce bloodline are hosts, they cannot survive without the system, can tap into Leagueworlds, but are not fully tied to them. main fronters are people who DON’T have internal presences, only are out on the outside, not really "people." includes spinny, most of the manic reds. mention the piano people: main manic people, can't write music to save their life though. glissando might still be our composer. mention last week, or whenever, the expo= how around that time we were working on Parnassus like crazy, but had to stop because the mythology is giving it an awfully bad vibe. so that made us stop."
track 10= "the whole idea of stabilizing into spectrum slots is huge, especially with central, but spine says "you also have to wake up into Leagueworlds too." kind of like how she woke up to her role in Parnassus before, we thought she was vermilion in central. she was iffy for a while, we should go back and look through her entire past because of that. but she said awakening into league worlds is big too.
also. in terms of socials/ negative alters/ etc., once they are aware of their role, they no longer bleed over into other people. the one girl who feels like "jessica" and might be the original depressed one, she has a fear that she's the original and she will sabotage everyone else's efforts, "they're not real," etc.
when she's aware of herself doing that, suddenly she no longer bleeds into anyone else and freezes up to actually exist.
also when she is tangibly aware of being a PART of the system, she stops hurting us because "I'm not the only one, I'm not the original," she will stop and rest???
track 17= "also. black light machine is an instant existential validation song. it's like, when it starts playing, life feels like a movie, in a real "life is alive, there is a plot to our lives" sort of sense. and its brings us into full awareness. frost* has that kind of power for some reason. not sure who was around in 2009 at the time we discovered them. but don't get trapped in the past. it might be an evolved thing. point is, it's relevant now and it is hugely important. it's like a universal grounding/ anchoring/ alive thing for our system. bottom line, frost* is important."
track 19= "it seems that every summer, thanks to the heat that mimics severe selfabusive situations, maybe that's part of why we can't remember anything from slc, because the heat was so bad we just had shutdown dissociaton all the time.
see if during the summer we can access any memories of that time.
this is terrible; it's so hard to cope with this heat. we're thinking of hiding out in the cold stone basement at this point. the heat is so encroaching and smothering… for some reason it feels like abuse. it is so scary. I am fighting to not black out while driving.
we're needing to let out manic fronters just to calm down because the rest of us can't manage this fear and agitation.
so be careful, we'll probably find a lot of hidden memories during the summer."
old track 21= three main abusive methods are:
BLOOD = RED
SEX = CERISE
FOOD = BROWN
(cerise used to bleed into pink)
and the three main motivations are
GRAY = KNOWLEDGE
BLACK = HATRED
WHITE = APATHY
all this plays together!!
BE CAREFUL! pay attention when hacks happen, we need to find out WHY this stuff is in those colors, and GET IT OUT.
see if there are any correspondences "across" on the system? like how aqua is across from gray. but they could not get cz because he has something in his light brighter than any of that.
also upsetting, why is there SO MUCH NEGATIVITY all on that ONE SIDE of the spectrum?? there should not be negativity in colors at all!
find virtue/vice correspondences for all colors if that applies.
we HAVE to tie back into our personal symbolism again.
the body is horribly sick after a triple-aspect hack attempt this morning. don't overanalyze it because that just brings you into gray. we have to be full of COLOR and LIGHT to heal.
THAT is our "normal." we have to be the light. we can't let anything chase us away anymore. we have to stand strong no matter what it takes.
be very careful, be loving, be forgiving. I know its summer but we can make it through.
it only feels frightening because there is stuff we need to face and heal.
but we're doing well. we'll be all right. we can't be defeated, god/light can't be defeated, and that's what's in our heart. don't worry, we'll get through this.
"color redemption is in the color. retributors are a prime example"
note for may 3= "Emmett was out, so he's okay. at the store there was a lot of talking with spice. write that down, because people are coming through very strongly. we got blueshift to work, so not only did we get all the old league stuff out, but we were able to go through the old pictures folder, and we got a rough timeline for when glissando was out. spinzor is still alive; mention that different voices come out in the winter/summer because it's different environments/ contexts/ triggers/ etc that they can survive. spinzor still thinks its summer 2009, we shold be at marywood and hanging out in the coffee shop. that's actually a good way of surviving= locking yourself in the café for 6 hours and just typing. yesterday we found out a lot of info about old cores. differences between cores/ hosts/ social fronters, some pass themselves off as other things; we used to assume a lot of social fronters were cores and they're not. cores hold the JEWEL bloodline, they can survive WITHOUT headspace. "the" core is allegedly the one who's about 12? we don’t know. no one from childhood. spinzor kind of counts in this bloodline. the jayce bloodline are hosts, they cannot survive without the system, can tap into Leagueworlds, but are not fully tied to them. main fronters are people who DON’T have internal presences, only are out on the outside, not really "people." includes spinny, most of the manic reds. mention the piano people: main manic people, can't write music to save their life though. glissando might still be our composer. mention last week, or whenever, the expo= how around that time we were working on Parnassus like crazy, but had to stop because the mythology is giving it an awfully bad vibe. so that made us stop."
