miss you

[prismaticbleed]

SESSION PARTICIPANTS
  LAURIE UBERICH  JAY IRIDOS



Laurie, we need to talk.

I know, kid. I know. ...Thanks for reaching out to me like this. It means the world to me, really.
Also, why the heck are you talking in red? That's Javier's color, dude. Get your own bloody pen.

How's silver? Also, that "dude" felt really unstable for you.

You're rubbing off on me; who bloody knows.
But you gotta expect some mistranslation and delay-mixups here, kid. It's been a heck of a long time.

Too long, I want to say, but you know how God works.

Yeah, no kidding.

Perfect timing, even if it may not seem that way whatsoever when you're caught up in the storms and shadows of it.

...It says a lot that that's me and Infi, y'know.
Even the hard times love ya, kid.
...Guess that's the point you were trying to make, huh.

...at heart, yeah. same with the time thing.
...and the deep waters.

And rainbows, for extra reason lately, so I've heard.
...Sorry. I shouldn't be pushing that issue so casually. But for heavens sakes, it's important. If there really is genuine love glowing there, which I genuinely suspect it is-- then holy swords, Jay; that's HUGE.
Pun 100% intended, but seriously.
Don't you dare deny or dampen or run from that, kid. Please. You know how I feel about this.

...I do. I really do. Love is... it's our reason for existing, at the absolute heart of things. Especially mine, no matter how scared I may be of the past sometimes.

Leave that nightmare behind, kid. It's over, and God willing, I will put my very life on the line to keep it that way.

...I know, and I love you, too, just as much, with my whole heart.

...My point exactly, kid.
Now I really hate to change this subject, but why exactly did you call me in here tonight?
I know it's about that letter, but I've only got secondary awareness and besides-- I want your specifics. Talk to me.

...all right. let's just put it all out, for sincerity's sake.
So I just got a letter in the mail from grandma, but it ALSO included a note from viral, AND it was signed by Diamond & Lightning, too. And that's rare enough, but...
...everyone's handwriting looked so heartbroken.
grandma was misspelling things and her words looked all shaky and sad. viral, too, but far less so.
and... Lightning, of all people, wrote "miss you."
...
but grandma's words broke my heart.
Laurie, forgive my language, but I need this verbal punch-- I don't give a damn how "scared" part of us is to go back home. Like you said, that fear is rooted in the PAST, and we are NEVER going to let that repeat itself.
I will put MY life on the line, too, for love-- because PERFECT LOVE DRIVES OUT FEAR. and isn't that a shot to the heart-- but that's the point.
I'm only alive-- WE'RE only alive-- because of love. Because we ARE love.
And I want to crush that family-fear WITH love, because right now, I'd walk through hell itself to do so.

We've done it before. Key word being "we."
That's the thing "you" were missing with the E.D., kid. Love and unity on BOTH sides of the board.

which is why I feel so safe & happy here 99% of the time. there's a LOT of love & unity here.

Betcha it's waiting for you back home, too.
I mean, you'll always have it in here with us, but... maybe that's the key, too.
You.
Maybe you're a much brighter light than you realize, or want to admit.
God works in mysterious ways, kid.
And I am dead serious when I say that He is undoubtedly working through you.
And you wanna know why?
Because you love, Jay.
Because you love God, and let Him shine through you. Because you love everything He created, fiercely and honestly. Because when you see something or someone unloved, you challenge that void with everything you are-- you look for the light in them, for the light of God in them, and you find it. Without exception. And you can't help but love them-- everything-- with every prismatic fiber of your being in return. It's your nature. It's your heart.
Do you have any bloody idea how that affects people, kid?
Look at me.
Look at Chaos Zero.
Look at Julie, for God's literal sake.
Don't you dare ignore all of that light.
If it's too bright to bear, get your eyes fixed.
Open your heart, kid. Everything's gonna be all right.

That is literally the deepest thing I can say about this.
Keep on loving with everything you are, kid. Please.
It is literally what is keeping all of us alive.