dec 02 2014

[prismaticbleed]

 

Quick things about life lately.

Discovered that the local Wegmans has spicy coconut chips. I am addicted. Current favorite recipe is those + red lentils + cauliflower + lettuce + tons of curry powder + sea salt. It's fantastic. I miss eating good things like this.

Had a LEGIT dream last night, for the first time in too long. "Real" dreams for me feel magical and floaty but so real, I'm always lucid in them. I remember wandering through these labyrinthine empty half-ruined buildings, like houses and elementary schools. They weren't creepy, though-- it was broad daylight, and they were overgrown with plants in places. Lovely stuff. I remember my dad was there too. At one point I ended up outside, and ended up flying-- but when I did I turned into Eros? And I was flying over a sort of "fairy tale garden," like a hedge maze but with flowers and princesses and things. Hard to explain but it had a nice vibe. I was so contentedly blissful, I remember knowing clearly that I was dreaming and just enjoying the feeling of flight.

Today therapy was cancelled because of SNOW but I ended up on the road anyway because she didn't cancel until 5 minutes before the appointment, haha. Still I don’t mind, because Tuesdays are my driving days with Genesis, and I haven't seen him in at least a week the way it is. I missed him. He showed up while I was on the porch putting my sneakers on, and I nearly sobbed in gratitude, "don't ever leave" was the first thing I said to him. He said "I won't" and his expression matched mine.

LOTS of major inner healing going on lately, but disconnected from headspace. The stuff happening currently is very personal, almost detached? It's unusual, most of the "old troubles" can ONLY be dealt with from a non-self stance, a sort of glass-clear perspective uninvolved with anyone or anything else. So headspace has been very very quiet lately as a result. I think in general, it needs to be for a while. Events over the past few months suggest another System "reset" on the horizon, more of a "redefining" this time I hope. We're in heartspace now and we need to match that. So the groundwork is being done in isolation, right now, is what it feels like.

DREAM WORLD. I'm going through all the random written notes from 2012 or so, when the story got very jumbled and I wasn't sure what I was writing. Seeing how much I've learned and realized since then is astounding, really.
There is SO MUCH SYMBOLISM, it's gorgeously moving the more I learn of it. It jumps out of the woodwork and it's creepy and wonderful. I want to talk about it so badly but-- as always-- it is absolute spoilers. Ah well, it's groundwork and it's so satisfying to see it building up.

Been listening to a lot of music lately, trying to find new stuff via Soundcloud and Tumblr. There's a fad of 8tracks mixes going around so I have a list stockpiled. I've only listened to this one and it is really cool; it's obscure and interesting and there's even Son Lux on it. My current favorite song now is from Soundcloud though: Carolina Street. It's oddly soothing and I like listening to it when typing at night. So there you go.



That's it for tonight, just wanted to post something.