over the rainbow

[prismaticbleed]

I just finished Off.
What a spectacular game.

I'm still in emotionless mode, but there was one little second in the last scene where I thought I was going to cry-- the silent tearing-up kind, not the sobbing kind. So it found a chink in my armor. I didn't tear up, but I found that sudden possibility noteworthy.

"You have not purified this place. You have destroyed, eradicated it. You have immersed it into a pristine nothingness."
"It's better like that."

How marvelously depressing, that I would identify so strongly with the destroyer of worlds.

"Taste my holy wrath, corrupt souls...
I'm here to make you atone for your sins."

This is my current favorite picture of The Batter and Hugo.
I think it's obvious as to why.

I keep thinking back to February 24th... or whenever it was... the incomplete "scratch." My attempt at setting the switch of my reality to "OFF."
It didn't work then, not entirely.
I don't know if I should try again.
"Should" is the key word.


Infinitii's necklace came in the mail today.
I don't even remember who he is.

I don't remember a lot of things.

I'm very tired. The angry voices won't be quiet.
I feel as if I'm drowning in a sea of righteous rage.
I feel as if I deserve every single punishment I bring upon myself.
All the blood, all the pain, all of the despair... it is all delivered justly.


I'm the one swinging the baseball bat, insisting on my holy role,
when in fact, I'm the one who needs purification most of all.


Bis Vincit, Qui Se Vincit In Victoria.