Christmas!

[prismaticbleed]

 

Just a quick update to close this lovely Christmas weekend.
The next week feels busy but in a joyful way, and very important.
I've tapped into my sparkling red-white self again, aha, it feels so amazing. I don't want to ever forget this again.
By the way, I'm studying anatomy again for art purposes, and wow, have you ever realized just how beautiful everything is? Not just the body and how it's built, but everything. Animals, plants, manufactured things, SPACE... seriously space is the most beautiful thing but we're part of it, remember! So I'm sitting here and staring at my computer and thinking "wow, what a gorgeous piece of technology you are." The same for my violin, the books all over this desk, the sparkly ribbons everywhere, my pens and pencils, all of it. It's fascinating.
There's that word 'my' and I don't like it at all. It's not 'mine,' none of this is 'mine!' I need to find a better word, something that isn't possessive at all.
I played violin at midnight mass yesterday by the way. Man I got absolutely no sleep, it was worth it.

Best Christmas gift: remember when I went to the MUM expo? Remember that woman who did the sparkling spirit pictures? My mother actually BOUGHT one for me, oh wow this thing is beautiful, I had no idea she did that for me! I'm so thankful.
I am secretly very moved by the colors used in it though. There's a tiny bit of pink and violet, sure, but it's mostly this greenish sort of blue... and when I put the picture on my desk, what do you know, it is the EXACT same color as Chaos in the original of this picture (Which, incidentally, my mom's boyfriend noticed on my wall today and said it was a great picture of him, how great is that). I am dead serious, take a look.
So I'm going to call the artist in a few days to talk to her about the symbolism she put in it, as well as the symbolism I am seeing all over it (there is so much), but until them I'm still smiling at that little non-coincidence.

Speaking of Chaos. I am still absolutely dying of bliss from Friday night. I'm serious.
I'm laughing because in my workspace right now there are... about fifteen visible pictures of him, no kidding. He's just everywhere, I absolutely love him.
I didn't get to spend time with Laurie or Genesis yet, though-- everyone insisted I take a break for heavens sake because I really have been spiritually exhausted. So the only person I've really spoken to since Friday has been Xenophon, because seriously, I'm not going to shun my daughter over the holidays! She is having a lot of fun, I just wish I could do more for her.
By the way my friend drew her for me, as a bonus for the commission I bought, and that was just perfect. Surprise Christmas present, haha! She loves it, I'm so glad. Plus she learned today that if she hides under the kitchen table she can eat all the cookies she wants and no one will accidentally 'walk through' her while she's ghosting. It's hilariously adorable. I think she likes gingerbread even more than I do.

It feels so weird to not be wearing my ring, really this is funny. I started wearing it again after my SC chat group brought up the topic, mostly why most of us don't wear wedding/ engagement/ etc. rings because how in the world do you explain that to curious strangers? Seriously I had someone at a gas station ask me once, "so who's the lucky guy?" First of all don't assume it's a guy, haha, and second of all the 'lucky guy' is an alien who doesn't exist on this physical plane, yes I'm dead serious, would you like to meet him he's an absolute sweetheart. But yeah I absolutely refused to lie about it so I kept awkwardly avoiding questions instead and just stopped wearing it after a while. Now I'm just shrugging and wearing it anyway, haha. So it feels odd not to have it on right now, which is a nice change of pace actually. I mean I don't need it to prove anything but it's a nice gesture. Why yes, I'm in love, going on nine years now, it's opened my eyes to everything.

There's only one tiny bit of bad news and that is that I had a sudden dream hack this morning. I tried to fight it off but I couldn't wake up in time to get away. Oh well. I refused to let it ruin my day.
My boss, Mr. Sandman, showed up later this morning to apologize for not being able to prevent that, and it worried me because he looked tired when he showed up and his first question was 'who was responsible for this?' (The man packs a mean punch when he's angry, remember?) I assured him that I was okay, and if anyone was 'responsible' it was that tar shadow we've been dealing with, but fighting it doesn't help so please don't go brawling with it even for a good reason. So yeah, that was a challenge but I dealt with it well. I know Laurie took my boss aside after that to talk to him, so I'm sure she managed to calm him down even more so than I was able to.

I was very aware of what Christmas really is about today. Love and compassion against all odds. The Son of God, this Being of holy light, being born into this world to lead the lost home, all of them. It's about gratitude and forgiveness and unity... but love above all, once again. Even if you don't believe the story, or even if you only see it as symbolic, you can nevertheless appreciate the message it brings. Don't lose this! Just because it's not Christmas doesn't mean you can't carry that with you. Heck, I think that's the whole point.

And now it is late and I have art and music work due for friends as soon as possible, so I need sleep. Plus I'm not communicating well right now, as you might have noticed, as I'm already half asleep.
On that note, have a good night.