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[prismaticbleed]

 

Extra Eucharistic prayers for family & friends today. took at least 20 minutes. exhausting mentally and physically but worth it. reminded us very clearly of how much we truly love everyone and fervently want them to be saved.

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VOTD = Proverbs 10:17
We must WELCOME discipline & correction, even ASK for it, because when we obey it, it will help us become the person God created us to be! After all, correction & discipline can only occur in response to a wrongdoing or failure to do what is proper-- this means that discipline always leads us back towards God, onto the "path of Life."
Also a very important warning that if you REJECT discipline, you are WILLFULLY OPPOSING GOD, essentially claiming that you "don't need to be corrected," because "you did nothing wrong" or even "imperfectly"! THIS IS PRIDE. And when we are obstinate like this, refusing discipline, WE LEAD OTHERS ASTRAY. That's TERRIFYING.

"Remaining teachable begins with humility. It begins with realizing that we're not perfect and need others to see our blind spots."
This means OUTSIDE THE SYSTEM. Yes, we can do this for each other inside to an extent, but we share the same soul so we WILL share "blind spots" whether we like it or not.
That "you're not perfect" phrase still hits our childself mentality like a death knell. As a child, we were effectively told that we MUST be "perfect". Our shortcomings & flaws were constantly pointed out, often in comparison to other kids who did not have such defects.
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Humility felt like suicide, in that sense. Humility meant "giving up fighting," giving in to the terminal illness of our imperfection. We were too terrified to even imagine how our family would have responded, had we done so. It's sad. They felt they "had to be perfect," too. It's why they didn't give us any leeway; there couldn't be a double standard. They were afraid of their own imperfections, so by forcing us children to be "perfect," it would reflect on them too. We were all fighting a losing war.
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As for being teachable, we yearn for that virtue.
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The KVOTD had one line I want to highlight =
"Lord, please show me how I can use my daily decisions as acts of worship to You."
I forget that's even allowed, let alone possible! It's why we're so exhausted from prayer-- deep down we are fearfully convinced that ONLY "RECITED" PRAYERS COUNT. Everything else is "cheating," and is therefore blasphemous & irreverent.
But all this pseudo-pious fear is actually doing is divorcing our physical life from our spiritual life. It's labeling our general existence as unholy and unclean. Hence all the OCD rituals, probably!
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We just got this amazingly relevant bit from the guided prayer =
"We pray because prayer is the expression of an intimate relationship with God, an ongoing dialogue that brings Christ into every detail of our lives. Prayer can feel risky because it requires two things of us: trust in God’s goodness and submission to His sovereignty. Prayer is the alignment of our heart to His... A strong prayer life is not a destination but rather an infinite exploration of the Heart of God. You are always a student of prayer because God uses it as a vehicle to reveal Himself to you."
1) You cannot truly pray if you DON'T have an intimate relationship with God. This is
2) Prayer isn't "talking at," or giving a speech, or even just studious recitation. It is a DIALOGUE, and therefore it REQUIRES THE INVOLVEMENT OF YOUR PERSON. Prayer requires that you speak in order to listen, to commit to communication at the very outset. It's not ever about you. It's about you and God.
3) Prayer opens the door of our daily life for Jesus to come in? Even more truthfully, it's like a marriage-- you're letting Him into your "private existence" to SHARE it, not just visit! It's an intimate relationship, not a casual one!!
4) Prayer requires TRUST.
5) Prayer requires SUBMISSION.
6) This is the point that's hitting the hardest. Prayer aligns our heart with God's Heart.
7) Our goal in prayer should NEVER be to "level up"-- to "say more" for the sake of sheer effort, or just to add more hours to our prayer schedule. It's not about "stacking indulgences" or "doing the dailies". It's not even about "if I don't say these specific prayers, for this specific amount of time, I'm not really a good Christian and God will be angry with me." Et cetera. You're treating prayer like a sentence, a legal obligation, an almost penal effort you must power through "or else." You're desperately trying to reach a destination of "holy enough," of spending "enough time" and saying "enough words", and yet you keep adding more numbers to each. You keep raising the bar. It's unreachable. It's inevitable. Any lower and you'd be "punished for spiritual sloth & lack of zeal." So you drive yourself scrupulously insane, trying to "become a saint" through sheer mental labor, when deep down you're just a frightened sobbing bruised & battered child trying to one day "make God happy with me", trying to appease the God Whose back is turned in disdain.
That's not what prayer is. That's not Who God Is. No wonder we have it all screwed up.
8) Prayer is, almost scandalously, "an infinite exploration of the Heart of God".
9) We're not the focus of prayer. It's not even ours, not entirely-- after all, if it's the result of a relationship, then the other party is already intrinsically involved in it.
it is to be used BY God, literally as a vehicle of the Almighty, to come to us??
10) We are STUDENTS of prayer-- but not in an academic sense. Prayer is not something any textbook can hold, or even describe. Prayer IS DIALOGUE. It is relational. It can only be learned within itself. We are students because we can never teach prayer. It's impossible.
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11) Love is a state of Being. Prayer is a result of Love. Therefore, prayer is also a state of Being?
Is this what Mallett was talking about, with the Flame of Love and the "new era of sanctity"?
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"I need to be connected to You, and I know that the Bible and the Holy Spirit are my guides... Help me keep Your words in my heart and mind so that I might be more like You in my reactions."
THIS is why we need to just straight-up READ THE BIBLE, "in bulk." We need to be INUNDATED with it, to drink it in so thoroughly on a daily basis that it REWRITES OUR VERY INSTINCTS.
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Taking a minute to GET SLAMMED by the First Reading=

"God made man imperishable, He made him in the image of His Own nature."
Another translation given=
"‘God created us for immortality and made us in the image of His Own eternity’."
1) MAN WAS MEANT TO HAVE ETERNAL LIFE-- Man was literally designed for it!!
2) MAN REFLECTS THE VERY NATURE OF GOD, which is equated with His Eternity-- what makes Him Eternal IS His Nature, and His Nature is Love & Truth, among literally infinite other virtues & perfections. AND HE APPARENTLY MADE US TO MIRROR THAT.
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"It was the devil’s envy [and malice] that brought death into the world, as those who are his partners will discover."
1) THE DEVIL IS ENVIOUS OF THIS LIKENESS!
2) ENVY CAUSED DEATH.
3) YOU WILL EXPERIENCE THIS MURDEROUS ENVY FIRSTHAND IF YOU JOIN HIM. The devil is NOT your friend. He's not even your business partner. He's out to devour you.
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"But the souls of the virtuous are in the hands of God; no torment shall ever touch them. In the eyes of the unwise, they did appear to die... but they are in peace. If they experienced punishment as men see it, their hope was rich with immortality; slight was their affliction, great will their blessings be. God has put them to the test and proved them worthy to be with him; he has tested them like gold in a furnace, and accepted them as a holocaust... They who trust in Him will understand the truth, those who are faithful will live with Him in love; for grace and mercy await those He has chosen."
1) The massive implications of the first verse. No matter WHAT happens to the virtuous soul-- even punishment, even death-- they are safe from all torment. That's an ASTOUNDING distinction.
2) I'm struck by the immediate parallels between death & punishment, because that applies both literally & figuratively, and the Cross demonstrates this.
Our humility IS a small "death," which fittingly enables us TO "take up our cross."
3) This is the VOTD! For the virtuous, punishment is a means of holy discipline.

"Christ taught us to set our hearts on the Kingdom of God, and on its justice. In that Kingdom all that we need will be given to us. Until then, let us pray: Your Kingdom come, O Lord."
There's a very rich deeper meaning to this.
God's Kingdom is to come ON EARTH, as it is in heaven. This poor world plagued by injustice is to become the very location of Divine Justice's future realm. So we CANNOT abandon it. We CANNOT "let it be destroyed" in the false heartless "hope" that "God will just make a new one." NO. CREATION WAS MADE TO SHARE IN GOD'S ETERNITY TOO.
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"Blessed are those who know their need of God: lead us to seek your face in purity of heart."
This made me realize, we can "seek God" with impure hearts. We can even "seek God" while denying that we need Him. That's what so many ironic "truth-seekers" nowadays do. Their problem is exactly what this verse highlights: they don't feel a need of God AS GOD.
Too many "truthseekers" see God just as a "force" or some other impersonal thing, NOT A PERSON.
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There were some people on Christian YouTube commenting about rapture dreams, and all hoping Jesus comes back soon to set things right, and I just suddenly felt this wave of deep affection well up in my heart as I thought, "I hope I get to meet them all in heaven." In that moment I felt such a love & yearning for the universal community of faith; it was transcendent. It left me feeling changed inside. I can't quite explain it. Suddenly, I just... felt like I WAS part of God's family-- something infinitely bigger than myself, something REAL and TRUE and BEAUTIFUL, something completely devoted to & defined by Jesus Christ.
It's the "joy set before us" as we take up our crosses, as the Church prepares to join her Bridegroom in His Passion. No matter what, in the end, there is the Resurrection, and Eternal Life with Christ, with all His Children. That's worth all the suffering we must endure until. May we endure it together for love of God and each other until then.  

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Today's SPARK =
"Before His Passion and Death, Christ gave His very Self by becoming bread to sustain us with His everlasting Presence. To use an analogy, just as a television can only operate properly when plugged into an electrical socket, Christians only function properly when they are connected to the Living God. God becomes our food, the power source for the human soul. When you have a Source of Life, you can be a source of life."
Dude I have never heard this phrased so simply yet profoundly before. It's admittedly probably because I never understood what "food" properly IS, thanks to my disorder-- it's SUPPOSED to be a POWER SOURCE!!
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I also had to look up "ecclesiastical ministries and works of the apostolate," and apparently etymologically, at the roots, the former means "one who shouts out" and the latter means "one who is sent forth." And that's beautiful, in how simply it puts the work of the Church: to "go out to all the world and proclaim the Good News." We show our faith "in words AND works." We are heralds and envoys, speakers and witnesses... for the Eucharist. Here's the context, that most magnificent catechesis:
"“The Eucharist is ‘the source and summit of the Christian life.’ The other sacraments, and indeed all ecclesiastical ministries and works of the apostolate, are bound up with the Eucharist and are oriented toward it” (CCC 1324)."
That speaks volumes. It changes our perspective on everything.
What are we preaching, at the very heart? The Eucharist. Yes, we proclaim the literal Gospel, the teachings & message of Christ, but consider this truth now-- ALL of that has its source and summit, too, in the Eucharist. EVERYTHING in the New Testament finds its perfection & purpose in the Eucharist. That is a FACT, even if it is too deep for my poor mind to fathom. It is still utterly trustworthy.
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"There is NO act of worship that is perfect OR pleasing to the Father, EXCEPT for the obedience Christ offers to Him, shown in its full glory through His Paschal Mystery. We have been given the chance to share in this worship through our participation in the Eucharistic Sacrifice. Christ in the Blessed Sacrament is a foretaste of our heavenly worship and our eternal reward. Christ’s True Presence in the Eucharist allows us the opportunity to encounter this reality daily... In the sacrifice of the Mass, God offers us a chance to participate in Divine Communion, sharing His Own Life with us. In the Eucharist we are offered a chance for a deep and personal encounter with Jesus, who is both the foundation of our faith as well as the height of it."
1) That first line knocked me right over. NOTHING I ever do as "worship" can please God. Let that sink in. Pride fights that truth, tooth and claw, every moment of every day. But it's unquestionable. It's shockingly obvious. Pride can fight, but it cannot deny. "Filthy rags" are all any human has to offer God. We are fundamentally imperfect, intrinsically flawed. All created things are, because we're not God, and we CANNOT be God. Pride will deny that, terrifyingly enough; modern society proves it, and the devil shouts it as a rallying call to selfish hearts. But that's not tonight's discussion. My point is that, in absolute basic reality, human beings cannot do anything that is objectively "good," and therefore cannot properly worship God as He justly deserves & demands by nature.
Our only hope is the Eucharist.
2) Christ Jesus is sinless, and incapable of sin. He is spotlessly holy by nature. His Heart and Will are entirely united with the Father's. And why? Because He is fully God. He CAN do good, objectively & definitively, because "no one is good but God." But He is also fully Man, and therefore, His worship is shown in the only say a human can properly worship God-- through humble, pure, loving obedience. And so, when we unite ourselves to Him by baptism, and we participate in the Eucharistic Sacrifice, His obedient worship becomes ours, as members of His Mystical Body, as the people He purchased with His very Blood offered IN the Eucharist! He WANTS to offer this worship on our behalf; that's WHY He is our eternal and perfect High Priest! He knows that's the only possible "pleasing" worship-- to claim anything less sufficed would be a blasphemous affront to The Father's Holy Perfection. So Christ offers it for us, for His Glory alone-- no mortal can claim any merit. But we are blessed by grace from it, abundant beyond our ability to even imagine. Remember: the Eucharist, the Paschal Mystery, is indeed the only perfect & eternal Sacrifice, but it is also our salvation, our redemption, our food, our life. That's astounding. This perfect worship offered to God is simultaneously the perfect mercy offered to sinners.
3) IT IS ALSO HEAVEN. Every single Mass is a glimpse of the eternal bliss won for us by the "Mass" of the Passion. We will be in the very Presence of God, adoring Him, praising Him, loving Him... and He will be our everything: our light, our joy, our strength. This is our "reward," for doing nothing but staying united to Christ, for letting Him live in us, through us, to sanctify & save us... our reward is God Himself.
4) And we receive God in the Eucharist every single day.
There is no way to express the profundity of that fact. It's ineffable. It seems impossible. It boggles the mind. It stuns the senses. And it's TRUE. It's also sadly why so many people struggle to accept it-- it is literally a world-changing revelation; it MUST become the center of your entire existence. But we are so foolish, so weak, we are afraid to let go of the world, we don't truly understand WHAT and WHO is being given in the Eucharist. If we did, we would run into His Arms immediately and never leave. But we have chains to this passing life, and we hesitate, we avert our eyes, we don't try to understand better because we KNOW what it will cost, what that awareness will justly demand of us. We play the fool, not realizing that we're running from Life Himself.
...but He's there, every day, just the same. He waits in the Tabernacle. The depth of Love is unfathomable. Why are we afraid to respond? Are we afraid He will demand the same? Don't we realize that to love Love Himself is the purest joy, and an effortless one at that?
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There's really nothing more I can even attempt to type about this. I'm still so new to the faith, in truth. All of this is new to me. I can only grasp what little glimpses the Spirit gives me, and even then my own ego & ignorance get in the way, and see things so imperfectly, and so incompletely. Everything I say in response is just snowblind childspeak; I have no authority, no credentials, no wisdom. If I speak any insight it is of the Spirit. I am just a poor dazzled fool, dithering on about some great beauty I can barely even perceive, and yet which stirs my very soul to shimmering. I can't help but respond to it, like a bell struck, even if my tone is laughable. It's still the only music I can make, and therefore I owe it to God as my only offering, however poor, with all the stumbling sincerity I can muster.
Even then, Christ is my hope. If anyone can write my pitiful notes into a symphony, He can. To Him be all the glory. Amen.


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We need to get a sense of direction & purpose in our daily typing again. It's been too random & unstructured; we can't make any measurable or coherent progress that way, and in any case, we NEED to be reading ACTUAL SCRIPTURE daily, not news articles.
Back we go then to the Expositor's Commentary!

"...What if, when we come to the dark valley at last, we have never seen Him Who alone can safely guide us through the dark valley?... if ever you and I are to die in peace, it can only be on the ground of having seen Jesus as our sanctification, righteousness, and redemption."
And remember: whoever sees the Son, sees the Father as well.
So really, in a way this is asking us: do you have the right view of God? Have you ever seen God for Who He actually Is?
Jesus, Who is God, IS our Sanctification-- He gives us Himself as Sacrifice to purify us, and as Food to give us true Life. He calls us out of the fallen world to be His Own chosen people, marked with the sign of the Cross.
Jesus, Who is God, IS our Righteousness-- He offers all the merits of His sinless Life on our behalf, forgiving us our own sins as we repent and enabling us to do good through His own Grace and Power generously poured out into our helpless & humble hearts.
Jesus, Who is God, IS our Redemption-- with His Blood, He has paid our infinite debt in full, has freed us from slavery, and has given us both citizenship and a family.
If you see Jesus in this true Light of His Love, as the Good Shepherd that will not, cannot ever forget or abandon you, His beloved lost lamb-- then no dark valley in the universe, not even death itself, can frighten you, because you know you are held safely in His Everlasting Arms... and there, so close to His Heart, is eternal peace.


"A view of the Saviour transforms our souls and moulds them into His likeness... a view of the Saviour produces moral and spiritual, as well as physical, results... If you want to live the Christ-Life, strive to see Jesus and study His character."
I'm getting the strong impression that this "seeing" is no brief glance, or casual look, or even an admiring attention. To "SEE" Him is to see HIM, and He is more than the eye can see. To truly see Christ we MUST view Him with our heart.
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