UPMC journal 101922

[prismaticbleed]

+ Today we're focusing on DBT AND Bible study-- because without God's wisdom, graciously given to us through His Word, nothing is wise. Secular psychology CAN be VERY TOXIC, because it REJECTS MORALITY & RELIGION, and disparages the TRUE spiritual/ supernatural reality-- it uses terms like "wisdom" & "mindfulness" frequently, but they just feel empty & wrong, honestly because they don't acknowledge GOD. So I MUST make sure I DO, in this recovery process, or it WILL IRONICALLY DISORDER MY SOUL, craftily leading me astray with "empowering" and "nonjudgmental" language, darkly enticing me to rely on my "own strength & skill" instead of GOD'S GRACE & POWER-- to become a humanist instead of a Christian. The subtlety is terrifying. A lot of it IS good, healthy advice. Emotion regulation & distress tolerance skills are useful, IF used prudently-- again, I'm just honestly disgusted by the blatant lack of faith in all of it. Even the "radical acceptance" skills are hollow-- they DON'T acknowledge GOD'S WILL, and so they AREN'T GRATEFUL TO GOD; furthermore, the stance of "acceptance" they promote is void of virtue, because ONLY A CHRISTIAN CAN CHOOSE TO SUFFER, and doing so is BY THE POWER OF GOD! Not "your wise mind" or ANYTHING of human nature. By CHOOSING to suffer, AS CHRIST DID, we UNITE our pain to His and it BECOMES REDEMPTIVE-- AND NONTOXIC!! Disorder CANNOT EXIST when the LORD of ALL CREATED ORDER makes His Presence known. So yes, DBT helps, but the Holy Spirit CAN & DOES ACCOMPLISH the SAME beneficial ends, and INFINITELY MORESO. ...But I can't be an extremist even in this. I can't bash this program "because it's not explicitly Christian." Being so disdainful is ANTIChristian!! AND it's disgustingly hypercritical, because I AM benefiting from DBT, as are so many others. GOD GUIDED THE INVENTORS OF DBT, TOO, YOU KNOW!! The goal of DBT is LIFE, HEALTH, RECOVERY, COMPASSION, WISDOM, HONESTY, RESPECT... ALL VIRTUES OF GOD! The program IS FULLY COMPATIBLE WITH CHRISTIANITY; IT CAN ONLY BE ENRICHED BY IT. STOP BEING SO BLOODY JUDGMENTAL.
Ironically that way of thinking IS a distortion (DBT)-- "black or white" thinking! It's ALSO STUBBORNNESS AND PROUD ARROGANCE. It's POISON and you NEED TO STOP. Just because something exists "OUTSIDE" of religion DOESN'T MEAN IT'S "SATANIC." Geez honestly I'd be MORE afraid that YOUR "GATEKEEPING" of what is "morally proper" / "irreligious" / "RIGHT" IS "SATANIC," because it's FOCUSED ON EXALTING YOU. You're SO DAMN OBSESSIVE over "keeping yourself pure/ holy/ separate" that you FORGET that the REAL EVIL comes from YOU and YOUR dumbass choices-- MATTHEW 15:17-20-- and your STUBBORN-ASS RESISTANCE TO ADMITTING YOUR OWN SH*TTY CHOICES AND THOUGHTS AND BLATANT SINS IS WHAT CAN AND WILL SEND YOU TO HELL FOR BOTH IDOLATRY AND BLASPHEMY. GET OVER YOUR DAMN SELF BEFORE YOU ARE DAMNED, DAMN IT!!!
STOP MICROMANAGING REALITY AND STUPIDLY "TRYING TO BE PERFECT." YOU'RE NOT AND YOU CAN'T BE AND YOU SHOULDN'T BE. YOU'RE NOT GOD. ...AND I KNOW YOU KNOW A CERTAIN BLUE SOMEONE WHO CAN DRIVE THIS LESSON HOME BETTER THAN I EVER COULD. SO LISTEN. PLEASE. IF YOU DON'T OPEN YOUR HEART, WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE.







pre-snack//

+ Quick note-- Marisa just walked over to apologetically tell me we're TOTALLY out of flavored chips-- but with her broad stance, strong walk, and heavy eyebrows, I swear she LOOKED SO MUCH LIKE LAURIE. It went straight to my heart. So remember that. AND remember that SHE WAS IN MY DREAM LAST NIGHT, TOO!!! She's always there to protect me, LITERALLY from death/ being killed, in such dreams. God bless her, I love her so much.