aug 13 2015

[prismaticbleed]

today.

So I’ve discovered that wearing a ton of rave bracelets/power beads is INCREDIBLY soothing and I might just have to do this all the time now.
This is hilariously great. Now I have an excuse to be even MORE colorful and stuck-in-the-90s than I already was, with six Tamagotchis hanging off my laptop case.


On that note!
big focus on DEFINING OURSELF!
who we ARE versus who what other people TOLD US WE ARE, or we had "no other choice but to be," etc.

the hugely lethal risk of being a "blank slate" ESPECIALLY in leagueworlds
it is worst when the person is "faceless." nameless, a little less.
but when someone does not have a solid identity of their own yet,
ANYONE ELSE CAN DEFINE THEM IN THE MEANTIME.
AND THIS IS TYPICALLY HIGHLY ABUSIVE AND MANIPULATIVE.

this is why we have to be very very careful when working with outside people on the leagueworlds, people can get corrupted awfully fast.

BUT this is JUST as relevant in headspace!!


- the feeling of difference in outspacers depending on if they are in HEADSPACE or HEARTSPACE



forgot.
princess unicorn hacks?
I'd forget them but RAZOR WAS CRYING OVER THIS

awful awful vague numb vibe about the entire day.
TOTALLY CUT OFF FROM HEADSPACE.


still horrible gut-wrenching fear tied to this
hacks are now, always,
either FORCED
or ROUTED THROUGH AN UNAWARE PERSON.

still the disturbing "sacrifice myself for the good of another" motive with sexuality
very upsetting
especially since EVERY sexual context is TOTALLY DISSOCIATED FROM even then